Welcome to the Misadventures of Widowhood blog!

In January of 2012 my soul mate of 42 years passed away after nearly 12 years of living with severe disabilities due to a stroke. I survived the first year after Don’s death doing what most widows do---trying to make sense of my world turned upside down. The pain and heartache of loss, my dark humor, my sweetest memories and, yes, even my pity parties are well documented in this blog.

Now that I’m a "seasoned widow" the focus of my writing has changed. I’m still a widow looking through that lens but I’m also a woman searching for contentment, friends and a voice in my restless world. Some people say I have a quirky sense of humor that shows up from time to time in this blog. Others say I make some keen observations about life and growing older. I say I just write about whatever passes through my days---the good, bad and the ugly. Comments welcome and encouraged. Let's get a dialogue going! Jean

Wednesday, May 17, 2017

High Drama, Laugh-Fest, Body Parts and Quirky Widowers



CNN ran a story on Monday with the headline: The 'Trumphaustion' plaguing the GOP. In it their chief national correspondent, John King, said: “A number of veteran GOP members tell friends and associates they are at, or near, a boiling point – ‘Trumphaustion,’ as one put it -- after another week in which efforts to sell their agenda were overwhelmed by Trump's brash moves -- in this case the James Comey firing.” And that was before this latest round of whatever-you-want-to-call-it where our loose-lipped president raised the hackles of both Washington and the Heartland by revealing highly classified information to the Russian foreign minister and their ambassador. Trump has a mouth like Linda Blair…the crap just keeps coming out. When a photo of those two with Trump appeared---taken during their meeting by the Russians and released to their press, then to ours---an angry White House spokesperson said, “We were tricked! They lied! We did not anticipate that the photos would ever be used.” I’m starting a support group for people suffering from Trumphaustion. We’ll find a litter of puppies or kittens to hold and play meditation tapes while we suck on Chocolate Tootsie Pops. Goodness gracious, can we really stay sane with this head spinning, human drama queen machine in the White House?

That was Sunday. Monday I had lunch after The Gathering with my posse of new friends plus another woman new to the group. We talked---or I should say we laughed for nearly two hours about silly things like super-big butts and buying bras and the new lady gave a scathing monologue about young people and sex. According to her, they all have a check list of sexual things to do and they don’t care who they do them with or where. The way she pursed her lips and poo-pooed the morals of everyone under thirty-five reminded me of Dana Carvey’s church Lady character only this was no comedy act on her part. I thought I’d bust a gut laughing. She looked like she thought she could get a venereal disease just talking about the subject. Then the group gave me a crash course on how to shop on QVC which I doubt I’ll ever do but it was interesting how enamored two of the ladies were with shopping via their television sets. I must admit they were both better dressed than I was. I was wearing a burgundy blouse that’s much older than Levi my dog who turned nine last January. I can’t help it, I love that blouse and I refuse to donate it to Goodwill when it’s still in great condition and it fits in the loose and comfortable way I like. 

Tuesday I had another one-on-one session with my personal trainer. Only two more sessions to go before I have to decide if I’m going to buy another block of sessions. I’ve been going to the YMCA three times a week for two hours each time since early February and guess which parts of my body are getting smaller---my wrists and my ankles! I’ve lost some in other places, too, but not enough that the smaller clothes in my closet are calling me down to their end of the rack. I’m almost there but ‘close’ only counts in throwing horseshoes and grenades, as baseball player Frank Robinson used to say. My trainer is suggesting if cost is factor that we could meet once a month, stretching the sessions out. She’s concerned that I’ll get bored and quit coming without the accountability. Duh, it’s going to happen sooner or later whether I set up for more sessions or not. I’m more concerned that I'll be free to change to another gym where my health insurance will cover the monthly fees. $55 a month plus the cost of the trainer at the Y is nothing to sneeze at. The other place is near-by, too, but it’s teeny-tiny in size and what they offer in the way of equipment. I checked it out when I first learned about the deal, but at the time I thought I’d be using the Y pool.

I forgot to mention above when I talked about The Gathering that there were two newbies---a man and a woman who both lost their spouses seven/eight months ago. They go to the same church and came to the meeting together. I’m taking bets that they’ll be dating before summer is over. Heck, they already are but they just don’t know it yet. In his introduction he said they are both going through all the same things so they have a lot in common. No kidding. There was another new guy at The Gathering, too, who refused to tell the group his name. I’m guessing he feared all the widows in the room would track him down and start dropping casseroles off at his front door. Who goes to a group that's advertised as a place for people looking for friends and refuses to give their name during the round-the-table introductions? Mysteries like this drive me crazy and I was glad he didn’t join us for lunch afterward. “Hey you with the set a balls between your legs, will you pass the pepper please?”©

Russians in the Oval Office with Trump

22 comments:

  1. Trumphaustion, got it, how do we get rid of [him]it?

    Sounds like a lively gathering this time! I could use some of that.

    You are dropping a goodly chunk of change to have a personal trainer. Think if it was me after 3 months, I'd rethink her if after all that work I hadn't gone down a size. JMHO

    Newbie with no name. He really is scared of commitment, isn't he? Must think you gals are going to drag him off to the chapel.

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    1. My clothes were getting very tight when I started and I'm at that iffy point where I could go down a size if I didn't mind wearing the tight. I probably won't use her after my block of sessions are over.

      I can think of no other reason why he wouldn't give his name. LOL

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  2. LOL about the guy who wouldn't give his name. Too funny.

    In one of the photos, Trump had a positively beatific expression on his face as he gazed at Sergei Kislyak. Who would have ever thought we'd see Russians standing around the Oval like they owned it. The Russians got some great propaganda shots! :(

    I always love a Linda Blair reference. :)

    I bet you're right about the man and woman who both lost their spouses. Something similar happened to my sister. She and her present husband met each other about a year or so after their spouses died. I'm not sure they ever would have been a match before their losses, but they have a lot in common at this stage of life.

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    1. This morning on the news they said Putin offered to give congress the tapes THEY made at the Oval Office meeting with Trump. I hope our people sweep the place for bugs after they left!

      It will be interesting to see if the couple comes back and the other guys comes back. A lot of people just show up once and never come back again. How do you make friends that way?

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  3. Trump is such an embarrassment, but I can't tell you how many I know who like him and he seems to do no wrong in their eyes. Wow dating after just 6/7 months. It's four years for me and I just have no interest in finding another man. I had a good one. The new lady may be a bit prudish, but some younger people really do have some mighty low morals when it comes to sex. It's long past what it meant to a relationship in our day. Love your blog!

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    1. I have family and friends who love Trump, too. I don't think they really understand how complex the law and our constitution really is. If Trump breaks it, they see it as him just shaking up Washington while I see it as him as mentally ill and unsuited for the job he has.

      I agree that a lot of younger people are too causal about sex but I don't agree with her broad brushing of all young people. She was really funny (but didn't mean to be) when she described the fornicators.

      I have no interest what so ever in dating either but I know a few other widows who are or did within the first year. I had a good guy, too, and I know how long it took me to find him. I'm too old to do that again. LOL

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  4. As I posted on Face Book, if the man in the White House would just shut his mouth.......I also claimed that he might be insecure as he has to brag about everything he does and how YUGE it all is. Maybe not insecure, just an A** with a very large ego? I can't stand him and I voted for him!

    I would stay away from "Mr. No Name"--how weird is that?

    I think some young people are that way, but I'm so glad my grand kids aren't--at least my five older ones aren't.

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    1. I know too many young people who have taken the purity pledge or have otherwise given me reason to believe they aren't sexually permissive to think badly about the whole generation based the actions of some.

      Mr. No Name! Why didn't I think of that. Maybe I should go back and edit it into my blog.

      Trump just set a new record according to the morning news. He went a whole 16 hours without tweeting. I think someone finally got through to him, that's he's digging his whole deeper. I'd buy your theories and I also think he's an attention whore kind of like your neighbor.

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  5. I think he thought he was doing the reality show Apprentice - You're Fired!! The man is an egomaniacal A**H***, arrogant and stupid. That alone is a deadly combo. He is clueless and narcisstic and the list goes on.He needs to go away....far far away!...and please bring Pence the puppet with you.

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    1. You're right! He thought he could run the country like he runs his businesses and he needs a basic course on how the constitution and the government is set up. He steps in his own way with his arrogance that's he's the smartest person on earth.

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  6. I wonder if the man with no name will show up for the next gathering? If he doesn't share his name then you should all just give him a random one...like Homer, or Randolph.

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    1. LOL. If he shows up I'll have to give him a name for this blog, too. I like Judy's Mr. No-Name.

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  7. I am becoming more and more at east with The Donald. Finally even those on his side are getting weary of this bizarre reality show. We just need to relax and let him keep shooting himself in the foot. I have the feeling there is no way we have to deal with him for 4 years. I doubt he makes it to September.
    I wonder if no name is actually married and trolling. He is hiding something.

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    1. So many things he'd done have rolled right off his back that would have ended other careers in public life, it's hard to believe he's finally given himself a wound he can't recover from. I hope you're right about September but my money is on after the mid-term elections.

      Ya, the guy was hiding something! His name. Never occurred to me that he was trolling and was actually married. LOL

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  8. Most everyone I know is suffering from political exhaustion and the roller coaster ride that is not healthy. I know politicians warned us that fatigue would set in and that we shouldn't give up but we do need to preserve our sanity. And SNL, Colbert and Noah are helping us preserve it.
    I am still so impressed with your exercise regime...3 times a week @ 2 hrs a time. Wow! You say you lost weight in your wrist and ankles but I am sure that you have toned your muscles, which is as important. Good luck with it.
    Regards,
    Leze

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    1. Couldn't agree more with what you wrote in the first paragraph.

      My muscle power was none existent before and I am definitely making a difference in that department. I've written about doing stairs now in the normal way and I no longer fear not finding a handicapped bathroom stall in public places...I can do the low squat needed and get back up without the rail. The strength training is making a huge difference in everyday things. When my trainer does her final evaluation at my last training session I'll have actually stats to share. One stat, though, I'm already impressed with is that my leg presses started at 15 pound pushes and I'm up to 85 pounds. And if I fell now, I'm pretty sure I could get myself off the floor now which was a big fear since my last fall a few years ago.

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  9. I laughed out loud at your descriptions of everything in this post. So spot on and funny! Sex has been with us for a long, long time so I'm always surprised at people who spend emotional energy condemning what others choose to do. Made for some mighty entertaining reporting however!

    I don't have trouble getting off the floor, but sure would like to be able to rise from a squat without pushing off the floor with my hand. That bottom shelf at the grocery store is a real bear-cat when I can't get close enough to read (or reach that last box or can at the back of the shelf). Doing more squats in my exercise routine doesn't seem to be helping much either. Frustrating!

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    1. It's been a week that you have to laugh to stay sane. LOL

      What has helped my squats the most is the leg press machine where you're basically doing a squat in a lay down position and pushing out on a plate that's attached to weighs. Feeling stronger sure improved my attitude about growing older. I don't have to accept a decline of strength and limitations on motions. Costly, though!

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    2. I just finished watching Rachel Maddow who mentioned that for the almost recent day she's had to throw out what she planned for her show because either the NY Times or the Washington Post broke news a couple of hours before the show, Instead of exhausted, I'm concerned we will forget all the awful things he is doing.

      As far the the less expensive place as compared to the Y, I think you should check it out with a staff member. I worked in a place comparable to a Y with a small gym. You might be surprised at what a small amount of machines, free weightd, bands, etc can do for you.

      Peggy

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    3. I hope you're wrong about forgetting. We can't allow his antics to be 'normalized' which could result in diminishing the office of the presidency forever. I personally think he'll keep on doing awful things at the same fast pace he's doing now. He's too old to change and his personality is totally unsuited for the job.

      I will check out the smaller gym. It seem claustrophobic to me the first time I was there. It wasn't even as big as my living/dining room!

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    1. Meetings with cocktails Mondays at 8:00.

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