tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post3057319470205948146..comments2024-03-28T20:40:18.960-04:00Comments on The Misadventures of Widowhood: Sexual Attraction and Second Chances at LoveMisadventures of Widowhoodhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comBlogger22125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-65516438950335951242018-05-21T17:36:06.134-04:002018-05-21T17:36:06.134-04:00Thanks for sharing this! What a nice compliment yo...Thanks for sharing this! What a nice compliment you and the friend gave each other and I can imagine how it felt to feel that you two clicked like that. I've actually been thinking about sexual attraction---again---lately and wondering why it is that men my own age don't inspire them. LOL<br />Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-1673000234541625402018-05-21T10:48:54.508-04:002018-05-21T10:48:54.508-04:00I'm very late to this post..like about 3 years...I'm very late to this post..like about 3 years, but I had to comment.<br /><br />A few months back a widow friend of mine had her stepson and his friend come for a short visit. A whole bunch went out for dinner at a rather rowdy place with outdoor dining, a live band and plenty of drinks. I happen to sit next to the friend (who is about 50 and very attractive). And we just sort of clicked in Maryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08987527540895782339noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-72801561704051107402015-03-03T17:41:10.031-05:002015-03-03T17:41:10.031-05:00That's the same thing I did with a young guy w...That's the same thing I did with a young guy who sold pretzels at the farmer's market a year ago. He was a winker, too. If men fully understood the power of a wink, they'd be falling all over themselves to learn how to do it. You will probably one day see Starbucks guy on the silver screen. Love what you said in the last third of this comment. We are indeed human and the rest.........Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-90995279684702162242015-03-03T16:56:02.942-05:002015-03-03T16:56:02.942-05:00I swooned at my Starbucks drive-thru one day about...I swooned at my Starbucks drive-thru one day about a year ago when a movie start quality young man, likely in his 20's, made eye contact, smiled and winked at me. I mean my heart skipped a beat and pounded all the way home. I was thrilled and embarrassed and immediately got on Facebook to alert all my friends that they needed to get to Starbucks IMMEDIATELY! Of course I tried to see him donnajurenehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10799559087972759233noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-64770062229362140782015-02-25T21:46:14.443-05:002015-02-25T21:46:14.443-05:00You know what you want and what it will take to ma...You know what you want and what it will take to make you happy, Bee. More power to you!Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-76002691656599863022015-02-25T20:16:58.023-05:002015-02-25T20:16:58.023-05:00i have only started looking in the past few months...i have only started looking in the past few months really. i am lonely at night. i don't want to marry again or live with someone but i'd love to have someone in my life that makes me smile (besides TCD who works 7 days a week).<br /><br />smiles, bee<br />xoxoEmpress Bee (of the high sea)https://www.blogger.com/profile/08300140506585000934noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-74759905106766488342015-02-24T22:45:36.679-05:002015-02-24T22:45:36.679-05:00I discovered blogging as a way to deal with caregi...I discovered blogging as a way to deal with caregiver issues a long time ago and then more recently as a widow. It does help. Keeping busy is important, isn't it.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-1673087220340057072015-02-24T21:33:45.820-05:002015-02-24T21:33:45.820-05:00I just looked at the movie trailer for Runaway Bri...I just looked at the movie trailer for Runaway Bride. I'd forgotten about that film. You're right, Richard still did look pretty good. I just didn't like the character he played so I over looked the film.<br /><br />I think what our brothers and their lady friends are doing is fairly common for second time arounders.<br /><br />Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-76395337113449081132015-02-24T21:21:46.097-05:002015-02-24T21:21:46.097-05:00LOL I think my get up and go got up and went with...LOL I think my get up and go got up and went with your get up and go. Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-25867574864884233652015-02-24T21:20:21.592-05:002015-02-24T21:20:21.592-05:00Yes, I agree our loss began long before our partne...Yes, I agree our loss began long before our partner's death. I had thought (indeed, my family and friends still think) that should make the final loss easier somehow. The fact that it didn't really surprised me. But it just shows, I think, how much communication was still there, even though most of my husband's ability to use language and much of his reasoning ability had disappeared.Chartreusehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05919069110736697400noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-483133963818310212015-02-24T20:53:32.112-05:002015-02-24T20:53:32.112-05:00It seems all perfectly normal because there really...It seems all perfectly normal because there really is NO normal! Look but don't touch. Lust in your mind. We've heard these admonitions throughout our lives. For me, it's way too soon but honestly, Mr. OK to Get Me Interested in Dating Again is a figment of our imaginations. My get up and go just got up and went.The Awkward Widowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03729456066739275695noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-75083422841902779092015-02-24T19:30:40.688-05:002015-02-24T19:30:40.688-05:00Loved this.
It's companionship that I'd ...Loved this. <br /><br />It's companionship that I'd want: someone to go to the movies with, out to dinner, family gatherings, etc. A friend/buddy/confidant. <br /><br />My brother lost his wife about ten years ago and had one monstrous experience with a woman. Then he and Donna got together about seven or eight years ago. They've been very good for each other. I doubt they will ever Bella Rumhttp://bellarum.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-5204187684577062512015-02-24T18:36:32.187-05:002015-02-24T18:36:32.187-05:00Well said, Chartreuse!
Those of us who where care...Well said, Chartreuse!<br /><br />Those of us who where caregivers to our spouses before they died did get a head start on widowhood because we had to let go in stages, mourning the loss of certain aspects of our relationships before they passed. For me, it was full body hugs and in depth conversations. But the love and companionship were there to the last moment and I still miss them both. BUT IMisadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-31028183799770737212015-02-24T17:39:16.059-05:002015-02-24T17:39:16.059-05:00I've only been a widow a little over a year - ...I've only been a widow a little over a year - though sometimes it feels much longer because I had been 'losing' my husband to dementia for several years before he died. I think I'm at a stage where being near an attractive man just makes me feel sad. Especially if a man exhibits that vitality - what I suppose you'd call a 'sparkle in the eye' - I'm reminded of all Chartreusehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05919069110736697400noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-74970614075526367642015-02-24T16:36:16.048-05:002015-02-24T16:36:16.048-05:00You were a lot younger than me when you became a w...You were a lot younger than me when you became a widow so it does make a lot of sense that you went "shopping" in guy land. <br /><br />A cougar would have to be dead if it didn't pounce. That's what cougars do. No, there is still another word/phrase for the feelings grocery store guy evoked and I'm going with he was a "memory prompter" until a better term comes Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-78284835089107802982015-02-24T16:26:59.273-05:002015-02-24T16:26:59.273-05:00I've come to the same conclusion for me too, J...I've come to the same conclusion for me too, Judy, that when I see a young man who has certain characteristics it reminds me of how much fun it was to be that age again. I don't want or need to recreate that fun. I have a vivid imagination and memories that can bring me back all by myself. Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-86884370465999050022015-02-24T16:21:47.671-05:002015-02-24T16:21:47.671-05:00Dean, I've seen that attitude on widow support...Dean, I've seen that attitude on widow support sites, too, with women who tried dating and quit because the new guys just don't measure up. I've even heard those exact words, "He wasn't the one." My theory is if a widow starts dating in the first five years, it's too soon and they are going to be doing too much comparing. I know it's only two guys but both my Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-9394930900864261452015-02-24T15:32:06.836-05:002015-02-24T15:32:06.836-05:00I have finally come to the same conclusion "M...I have finally come to the same conclusion "Men are not [low maintenance]". But only after trying a few men on for size after hubby died. I couldn't conceive of writing such a handsome part of the population off, so yes, I was certainly desperate to meet other men. Now I will not go to my grave wondering if the grass is greener on the other side! (memo: the grass is indeed GowitheFlohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01842273685414939160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-8757174072849870442015-02-24T15:24:28.853-05:002015-02-24T15:24:28.853-05:00That perfection is the main reason I haven't j...That perfection is the main reason I haven't jumped back into the dating pool, lots of the women my age have some version of 'Are you the one?', 'Looking for the one' written up. I don't even want to compete against unreasonable requirements. oc1deanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02302555382262295577noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-736417017255176802015-02-24T14:33:04.897-05:002015-02-24T14:33:04.897-05:00I see nothing wrong with getting a bit of a "...I see nothing wrong with getting a bit of a "surge" when you see a handsome man. I don't see anything I would be attracted to that is my age--or even close, but boy oh--I get that smiley feeling when I see good looking and 35-40-50. Oh yeah! I really am not interested in dating any man, but I think perhaps when I see much younger, I remember how much fun it was to be that age-Judyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03399435237919718544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-19530088792145162272015-02-24T11:28:27.865-05:002015-02-24T11:28:27.865-05:00I just reread something I wrote last July titled, ...I just reread something I wrote last July titled, "The Perfect Dead Husband" and was reminded of my theory of how widows tend to blur out the day-to-day petty annoyances that couples get into and we elevate the broader core things that keeps a couple together and happy. Don had his flaws but, like any other man, but he was perfect for me and my flaws. I think widows who are looking for Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-77795411497210990082015-02-24T11:12:32.158-05:002015-02-24T11:12:32.158-05:00When we've both had/have the best there is no ...When we've both had/have the best there is no one else that can fill the bill. That's where you and I are. We've had the very best.<br /><br />Have a fabulous day. ☺Sandeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06785788498697004273noreply@blogger.com