tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post7720065072586830337..comments2024-03-28T08:55:00.522-04:00Comments on The Misadventures of Widowhood: Black Friday, Blue Thoughts Misadventures of Widowhoodhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comBlogger29125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-36339460101045073312016-12-04T13:15:59.217-05:002016-12-04T13:15:59.217-05:00Unfortunately, the chocolate factory is only six m...Unfortunately, the chocolate factory is only six miles from where I live and I go by it often. Thankfully, I don't stop as often as it yells at me to do so. I limit my stops to holidays and that's bad enough.<br /><br />Madeline Albright wrote a whole book about her symbolic jewelry. If I was young or starting over all my jewelry would be symbolic. If others cracked the "code" Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-84474902225855565132016-12-04T12:58:49.930-05:002016-12-04T12:58:49.930-05:00I know that Head and Heart dilemma -- I have it ov...I know that Head and Heart dilemma -- I have it over lots of things. My mindfulness practice, like you mention about being in the moment now of being with family and trying to stop the grasping for more, really helps. I go back and forth with it around "downsizing" this big old house. But for now I love it and can manage and for today that's enough. My heart is here. <br /><br donnajurenehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10799559087972759233noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-74092051323239947102016-11-29T20:15:07.032-05:002016-11-29T20:15:07.032-05:00Thanks for writing such a thoughtful and thorough ...Thanks for writing such a thoughtful and thorough reply. You touched on so many common threads we have in common, including a 60 year long friendship with someone on a different coast. I worry that if something happens to one of us, that person's family won't let the other person know.<br /><br />I've actually got instructions and plans made for my dog in case of a short term or a Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-45777846308240004802016-11-29T18:01:27.735-05:002016-11-29T18:01:27.735-05:00You honestly expressed what you were feeling in th...You honestly expressed what you were feeling in those moments of time you described but doesn't mean that's your permanent state, or at least that's how I rationalize some of the various moods I've experienced the past decade following my becoming a widow. I think your assessment of the amount of time you would spend with family if you moved closer is probably quite accurate joaredhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09999395062839739698noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-75714279996768540092016-11-29T08:54:22.240-05:002016-11-29T08:54:22.240-05:00Wow, you summed up my holiday pity party perfectly...Wow, you summed up my holiday pity party perfectly. Thanks for that. My blue moods never last long but sometimes they just have to be acknowledged out loud. Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-19573066671838661452016-11-29T00:43:22.975-05:002016-11-29T00:43:22.975-05:00It was a good post. You wrote what you felt and i...It was a good post. You wrote what you felt and it's OK to share feelings. I doubt anyone is happy and grateful all of the time. I think we have our "pity parties" for a little while and then get back to daily life. I was surrounded by a large family on Thanksgiving but was relieved to go home and not have to act like everything is wonderful in my life. Holidays are hard when Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-3698213664757131962016-11-28T19:20:38.390-05:002016-11-28T19:20:38.390-05:00This is a classic male/female debate. One person s...This is a classic male/female debate. One person says one thing and the other hears it differently, or defines "right here" differently. I was so afraid of getting left behind or missing the meet-up places that I would repeat directions in detail and make Don do the same. In the long scheme of things it doesn't matter who is right or wrong as long as you still have each other to Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-20982911454132754762016-11-28T18:47:00.765-05:002016-11-28T18:47:00.765-05:00On Friday My wife, daughter AmyLynn & I went t...On Friday My wife, daughter AmyLynn & I went to Devonshire Mall because I wanted to get a Christmas gift for Mary Lou. Boy was that ever a mistake. Once we got there we noticed that the parking lots were loaded with cars so Mary Lou dropped me of at the door and I thought I said I'd see them at 11:00 exactly where they dropped me off. I guess she said at 11;30 and that was our biggest Paul Pietrangelohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15997368569947980343noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-40191019274027525932016-11-28T11:42:48.776-05:002016-11-28T11:42:48.776-05:00Peggy, thank you for reading here and I agree with...Peggy, thank you for reading here and I agree with what you're saying about the election. The fact that Trump has flip-flopped on so many things since the election gives me some hope but he could easily flip-flop right back again. He will never gain my trust or respect and that does add another layer of depression to the holidays.<br /><br />Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-23988537803315594352016-11-28T01:21:05.879-05:002016-11-28T01:21:05.879-05:00I think the the time between Thanksgiving and Chr...I think the the time between Thanksgiving and Christmas are always loney, depressing. I'm always happy to get past them. I'm single, no kids, and no close relatives.<br /><br />Because of the election things are even more difficult this year. This weekend I watched 2 shows on Cspan. The original airing was a week or 2 before the election and each group of speakers Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-2015611334212495812016-11-28T00:08:48.179-05:002016-11-28T00:08:48.179-05:00You are so sweet to say that. I'm in a better ...You are so sweet to say that. I'm in a better mood now so maybe my next blog will please me more.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-28285673215911547872016-11-28T00:07:46.996-05:002016-11-28T00:07:46.996-05:00Traveling north is a good thing to avoid. They sho...Traveling north is a good thing to avoid. They should be inviting you for the Forth of July. LOL<br /><br />I've never seen that tiny dog without clothing on. Only dog I've ever known with a wardrobe to fit all occasions. Mine has one coat and one sweater and he fights it when I try to put one on him. Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-21267787765741531192016-11-27T23:04:43.049-05:002016-11-27T23:04:43.049-05:00What?
"I wish I hadn't written this po...What? <br /><br />"I wish I hadn't written this post. I didn't spend enough time on it thus it was rendered dead-on-arrival and pointless."<br /><br />I read several good points ... family, aging, pets and life. One day at a time!The Awkward Widowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03729456066739275695noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-17440038720518086532016-11-27T22:09:37.962-05:002016-11-27T22:09:37.962-05:00A pajama-wearing dog? My, my. There's always s...A pajama-wearing dog? My, my. There's always something new. I spend Thanksgiving with two friends who have five tiny dogs between them -- all rescues, and all with issues of one sort or another. Eventually, pandemonium ceased, but it took a while.<br /><br />As for family -- well, I guess I have that solved, since I don't have any to speak of. I have my aunt, who's 90, and three shoreacreshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16284698314697628805noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-23087661597507524442016-11-27T09:52:33.275-05:002016-11-27T09:52:33.275-05:00I should have labeled that photo above. It's a...I should have labeled that photo above. It's a Papillion and very tiny. Not the one at the party but it looks exactly the same. My dog's photo is in the right side bar.<br /><br />Thank you for sharing that. I run into so few woman in our age bracket who never had children and I think being childless does bring a different layer of feelings and memories to the holidays. Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-55227802834473394842016-11-27T07:32:01.767-05:002016-11-27T07:32:01.767-05:00That is such an adorable dog! But he doesn't l...That is such an adorable dog! But he doesn't look 29 lbs. your post hit home with me in that it's just harder getting older, especially being widowed and alone. I too have no children and it was my preference, but now at my later age (70), I sometimes regret not having a daughter to be close with, like I was with my Mother. But there are no guarantees. Friends can be just as important as Maryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08987527540895782339noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-88541840377764447072016-11-27T05:58:46.047-05:002016-11-27T05:58:46.047-05:00Not long after our move, my health was so louse th...Not long after our move, my health was so louse that I told H we moved just in time. It would have been so difficult at that point, but now I feel much better. I'm so happy to be on one floor. In your defense, it's much easier to take on a big move if you have a partner. Your decision to stay put for now is probably the best decision. You don't want to move and then have to move again.Bella Rumhttp://bellarum.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-21266563620099010882016-11-27T00:26:55.663-05:002016-11-27T00:26:55.663-05:00I will have that conversation with my nieces when ...I will have that conversation with my nieces when the time comes. <br /><br />My family has always divided up the leftovers after parties and get-togethers while my husband's family never did. Although there are a few of the younger ones who won't eat leftovers. Don't know how they got that way. :( Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-39931540121800420032016-11-26T22:42:02.292-05:002016-11-26T22:42:02.292-05:00I think that the more holidays you spend with your...I think that the more holidays you spend with your niece and her family,the more likely it will be that, when you are no longer able to drive there, they will be thinking,"It just wouldn't be Thanksgiving without Aunt Jean; who can go pick her up?" <br />Is your relationship with your niece such that you could have an honest discussion with her about the pros and cons of moving. YouAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-44039379771791967112016-11-26T22:16:46.202-05:002016-11-26T22:16:46.202-05:00I actually did do well, didn't I. Two invitati...I actually did do well, didn't I. Two invitations and enough leftovers to keep me eating holiday foods for three days. And you are right that family might not be around most of the time but if you're in crisis mode they show up. That's the great thing about families.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-45734855339196498932016-11-26T22:13:36.116-05:002016-11-26T22:13:36.116-05:00I think it's a great idea. I don't think I...I think it's a great idea. I don't think I could stand living without a dog to keep me company. The only thing I would advise is to get one that you can pick up by yourself to put him/her in the car. Mine is 29 pounds and it's a bit of a struggle since he doesn't always want to go. Rescues all come with their personalities formed so take a lot of time in the shelter interacting Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-29281206286853600622016-11-26T20:16:41.797-05:002016-11-26T20:16:41.797-05:00I think you did pretty well this holiday. It was d...I think you did pretty well this holiday. It was difficult for a lot of reasons, mainly the election. Reading the comments I see confirmation that living near family isn't always the answer. Young couples today are so busy you don't hear a lot out of them day to day BUT I've found they're pretty attentitive if you're sick. It's just that you go back to not seeing a lot of Lindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11586429675286969340noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-23395455579003439072016-11-26T19:01:45.966-05:002016-11-26T19:01:45.966-05:00After New Years our thighs will be punishing as we...After New Years our thighs will be punishing as we try to undo all the bad stuff we've done over the holidays.<br /><br />I've actually made the decision to stay put until driving gets to be an issue, then I will go to an independent living place closer to my family. If I can't drive it won't matter at that point where I live but it will matter for my power of attorney for me to Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-30453218282008056982016-11-26T18:44:25.557-05:002016-11-26T18:44:25.557-05:00I am very close to adopting a rescue dog. I'v...I am very close to adopting a rescue dog. I've been a widow for a year and a half, and have adjusted to living alone. I count myself lucky, have two daughters near and their families are always there for me. But I would love to have "something" that would be glad when I came home! Haven't had a dog in years but suddenly would like the company. My kids have been urging me toAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-62839212575717684202016-11-26T17:47:16.110-05:002016-11-26T17:47:16.110-05:00LOL about punishing your thighs. I did plenty of t...LOL about punishing your thighs. I did plenty of that on Thanksgiving. We even had fried oysters. <br /><br />Family. I don't know if I'd see my family (my brother and nephew and their families) more if I lived closer to them. I do wish I saw my grands more often, who live in the opposite direction of the rest of my family. I think about how far away they live. If something happens to oneBella Rumhttp://bellarum.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.com