tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post2493726934774939677..comments2024-03-28T08:55:00.522-04:00Comments on The Misadventures of Widowhood: If it’s Thursday This Must be Book ClubMisadventures of Widowhoodhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comBlogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-22524770174367890992016-09-16T08:26:42.700-04:002016-09-16T08:26:42.700-04:00What a cool connection! Oh my gosh, that must have...What a cool connection! Oh my gosh, that must have been a great experience. Knowing the sound of her voice would sure make a different when reading her words. It's a book I doubt anyone would ever forget reading. Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-50930121615182702232016-09-16T07:57:45.646-04:002016-09-16T07:57:45.646-04:00I saw/heard Jacqueline Woodson speak in Detroit at...I saw/heard Jacqueline Woodson speak in Detroit at the Michigan Reading Association conference. She had just written the book, "The Other Side" which was illustrated by a friend of Bill Rich's. So cool to have the author's voice in my head. Cindyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11858313725382918139noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-31215602434056163872016-09-14T08:18:09.155-04:002016-09-14T08:18:09.155-04:00That doesn't happen often, that you can be tha...That doesn't happen often, that you can be that late for a haircut and still get it. That was nice of them both. At the shop where I go I've seen them reschedule people who were 10 minutes late.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-17284658032853899432016-09-14T06:07:59.889-04:002016-09-14T06:07:59.889-04:00Glad you were able to catch the lunch the followin...Glad you were able to catch the lunch the following day. I screwed up on a hair appointment last month. I showed up twenty minutes late because I thought the apt. was at 9:30 instead of 9:00. I arrived about 10 minutes before her next appointment. She cut my hair anyway. Very nice of her. Her next appointment showed up on time and sat there and talked with the two of us. Very nice of her, too.Bella Rumhttp://bellarum.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-58308866933226159262016-09-12T09:12:15.295-04:002016-09-12T09:12:15.295-04:00My house and yard is too big to stay here when I g...My house and yard is too big to stay here when I get older. So I don't know what I'm going to do.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-63669254054598928972016-09-12T05:30:58.023-04:002016-09-12T05:30:58.023-04:00Sitill plan to live in place in my home. Provided...Sitill plan to live in place in my home. Provided therapy servíces in these retirement communities so can appreciate benefits as well as aspects that dont appeal to me. Yes, we are all part of that "circle". Seems as though theres always some sort of revolution going on somewhere with the result not always having an inmediate positive out come. <br /><br /><br />joaredhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09999395062839739698noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-73647854559884274012016-09-11T10:14:18.093-04:002016-09-11T10:14:18.093-04:00I get what you mean about not liking the metaphor ...I get what you mean about not liking the metaphor of the carousel stopping. I don't want to get off either! Joni's "We're all captive on the carousel of time" is slightly different than Danson's 'revolution carousel' where history is always being made and individuals having a part in that history from time to time. <br /><br />It's a strong metaphor to use. IMisadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-72633283383717684332016-09-11T09:50:16.390-04:002016-09-11T09:50:16.390-04:00You should have seen the chef, the events planner ...You should have seen the chef, the events planner and me when we made the connection of why no one else was there. It was pretty funny. The only thing that suffered was the homemade crackers that went with the chicken cranberry salad and melon. You could tell it had been refrigerated overnight on the plates. But now that you bring it up he should have fed me on Tuesday as well. LOL<br /><br />TheMisadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-77514575983992899562016-09-10T22:57:09.128-04:002016-09-10T22:57:09.128-04:00I just got an email this morning from one of the c...I just got an email this morning from one of the classes I signed up for in our senior thing. He sent an email to all participants because the day and date were different. He was confirming that the date was correct and the day was wrong. I noticed it but I didn't think to notify the office...clearly someone else did! It's common!<br /><br />The poem with its reference to a carousel Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-27489227526998350522016-09-10T20:52:56.106-04:002016-09-10T20:52:56.106-04:00I'm still laughing about the fact that both yo...I'm still laughing about the fact that both you and the chef got the date wrong. I hope he fed you a really nice lunch! I was reminded of the year my mother was in the nursing home. My disabled sister always said that she made a point to get to know the nursing staff; otherwise, she was afraid that someone might try to stop her when she went lurching out the door with her walker at the end ofAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-33210243502754925612016-09-10T19:36:22.569-04:002016-09-10T19:36:22.569-04:00I have a friend who oversees an aunt's care an...I have a friend who oversees an aunt's care and she has over $400,000 and they are worried she's out live her money. Those places will run through your bank accounts so fast! It's scary.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-23695536712901519062016-09-10T19:34:01.595-04:002016-09-10T19:34:01.595-04:00I felt the same way about the views, Judy! My sist...I felt the same way about the views, Judy! My sister-in-law was in two different memory care places, both in small towns. I think those small town places get better care than in the city because the help comes more from farming communities. You will be fine. I hear a train each night. Didn't take long to get used to it.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-72467167730609111232016-09-10T19:26:19.119-04:002016-09-10T19:26:19.119-04:00When my sister and I looked for a place for our Da...When my sister and I looked for a place for our Dad, we learned so much. Ended up with a HUGE spreadsheet to be able to compare apples to apples. Since he really didn't have much money, we had to find a place that would accept him as Medicaid. <br /><br />It was CRAZY the way they price things ... like if he had ten pills a day, it was $X. If we wanted to add a calcium tablet, that threw The Awkward Widowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03729456066739275695noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-46162610438754445452016-09-10T18:52:15.991-04:002016-09-10T18:52:15.991-04:00or remain unmarried as Fred and I did. If he had ...or remain unmarried as Fred and I did. If he had to go in, they couldn't take my assets and vice versa. I have known older couples who get divorced for this very reason. They still live together, but they had divided their assets equally so the State won't get it all!Judyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03399435237919718544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-91438902752354975092016-09-10T18:50:37.388-04:002016-09-10T18:50:37.388-04:00Okay--I am be prejudice, but I think the memory ca...Okay--I am be prejudice, but I think the memory care people should be in the rooms over looking the freeway and the more alive people in a room with a nice view!!! I toured one of these places a few years ago and realized, I will have to go to an old, stinky nursing home. I also realized, because my step-mother lived in one of those fancy places, that THAT was where she had spent her 1/3 of my Judyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03399435237919718544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-76958704475009184742016-09-10T15:20:23.030-04:002016-09-10T15:20:23.030-04:00What worried me is I had three "memory things...What worried me is I had three "memory things' in one week: the luncheon, a lost umbrella and a water bottle left behind. Got the umbrella back and bought another water bottle the next day so I could quit obsessing about doing that. Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-8655479828935327572016-09-10T15:00:24.023-04:002016-09-10T15:00:24.023-04:00Yep. Judging ourselves is often the place we go f...Yep. Judging ourselves is often the place we go first -- because we are worried,yes, or embarrassed (and want to be the first to make excuses by blaming age/memory). Dementia is not a given, but it's terrifying to contemplate so we worry. I get that. I just don't assume my age is the reason for all my mistakes. LOL<br />donnajurenehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10799559087972759233noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-43840358507170406072016-09-10T13:08:11.280-04:002016-09-10T13:08:11.280-04:00I have no idea what memory care around here goes f...I have no idea what memory care around here goes for but I'll bet it's over $4,500 if independent living is around $3,000. They have fees for everything you add.<br /><br />There's one good reason why a couple should own as opposed to rent and that's the fact that the state will make you run through all your cash/investments to pay if one goes to a nursing home before they kick inMisadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-29032685254914821212016-09-10T12:18:56.690-04:002016-09-10T12:18:56.690-04:00Interesting that you write about this today when a...Interesting that you write about this today when a search is actually on in Houston, TX this week for a memory care facility for a sister-in-law. I was pretty sure they were in for severe sticker shock. I'd already experienced that when another family had to put another sister-in-law in memory care recently. We simply could not afford it. Apparently they start with a base package and add Lindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11586429675286969340noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-79733912914165881022016-09-10T11:41:36.113-04:002016-09-10T11:41:36.113-04:00There really are no easy answers or right, one-siz...There really are no easy answers or right, one-size-fits-all answers for everyone. I guess we need to be grateful that there are choices out there. There is a country I read about who were experimenting with offering free apartments for young people who lived assisted living places for seniors. And the results were positive for all ages.<br /><br />My youngest niece also went to a party a day Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-38861590365341724242016-09-10T11:07:16.572-04:002016-09-10T11:07:16.572-04:00I "shopped" for assisted living places f...I "shopped" for assisted living places for my mom once upon a time. I was grateful she was able to move into one that was a converted elementary school -- an historic building beautifully reconfigured for the public rooms with a couple of apartment "wings" added. The residences with the long, long corridors and too cheerful and slightly feminine/frilly decor were so donnajurenehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10799559087972759233noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-11372257100565465722016-09-10T10:11:02.408-04:002016-09-10T10:11:02.408-04:00Touring those kinds of places in a group is far be...Touring those kinds of places in a group is far better than doing it by appointment. No follow up phone calls. I've never been to one of the estate planning dinners but I'll bet you're right about them being hard-sell. For someone on a tight budget who likes to go to places like the zoo, art gallery, etc, it's a good trade off because every things including transportation, food Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-67651795089934650912016-09-10T09:41:46.505-04:002016-09-10T09:41:46.505-04:00One of Those places I wrote about have separate bu...One of Those places I wrote about have separate buildings for the separate levels of care, the other only had separate floors and dinning rooms. They must appeal to someone. The one I went to this week just opened this summer and they are already 66% full. What worries me is you know the costs are going to keep going up and up and at some point eat up savings, they what?<br /><br />I spend way Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-88864916804257299602016-09-10T08:43:32.174-04:002016-09-10T08:43:32.174-04:00We've all mistaken what day it was or got days...We've all mistaken what day it was or got days mixed up. If they say nay, they lie.<br />I suppose it's easier to blow the sales reps off as a group. I don't like their pushy, hard-sell approach and their expectation of your soul for the price of a luncheon much like a lousy date expects sex for a meal. It does sound as if you get to visit some interesting places. (I am not referring Sharonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02743921972328074980noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-32287358582033951672016-09-10T06:56:26.292-04:002016-09-10T06:56:26.292-04:00Glad you didn't miss out on the lunch. I'v...Glad you didn't miss out on the lunch. I've heard about those 'retirement villages' with an entry fee (non-refundable), monthly charges, etc. I pray to God I never have to enter one, and that I die at home.<br /><br />Re the free lunches, I used to feast quite well on tastings offered at the supermarket, Costco, etc. when they have multiple products on offer. The tastings do me Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com