tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post6400472381500329496..comments2024-03-28T08:55:00.522-04:00Comments on The Misadventures of Widowhood: Come In! Come In! Misadventures of Widowhoodhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comBlogger36125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-12793472990287858782021-05-08T18:16:58.545-04:002021-05-08T18:16:58.545-04:00I especially hate the chit-chatting neighbors outs...I especially hate the chit-chatting neighbors outside. A short conversation is fine but usually when I have an opportunity to go outside, I want to experience nature.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-10773115567803605042021-05-08T17:48:43.162-04:002021-05-08T17:48:43.162-04:00My worst nightmare is unexpected people at my door...My worst nightmare is unexpected people at my door! Even if they are friends (slight exception for relatives). My home is my retreat and unless I know you are coming, don't. I know that sounds just awful, but we introverts have to have some preparation for socializing and some idea how long the socializing will last. I have two neighbors (married) who will talk ALL DAY LONG and I endure donnajurenehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10799559087972759233noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-990823066932325182021-05-04T11:07:33.165-04:002021-05-04T11:07:33.165-04:00Times WERE different in the last century both grow...Times WERE different in the last century both growing up and as young adults. Plus I realize now much I depended on the dogs in my life to give me a 'character assessment' of the people standing at my door.<br /><br />To this day when I call someone I usually ask if they have a few minutes or is this a bad time. I've never been offended if someone says, "Can I call you back?"Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-60813857196776726942021-05-04T08:05:55.297-04:002021-05-04T08:05:55.297-04:00The times were different, and in the country quite...The times were different, and in the country quite different from the city, those years ago when your husband was growing up. <br /><br />I think clearly stating you need advance contact and don’t welcome unexpected drop-ins could be a good move right from the get-go. You can always loosen that in the future with some should you choose, but having to tighten a loose beginning could be much moreJoaredhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03155775053108104385noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-43647045565157176472021-05-03T16:53:48.772-04:002021-05-03T16:53:48.772-04:00Where I live now drops ins have not been an issue ...Where I live now drops ins have not been an issue and then the pandemic came along and none of us are getting visitors I'm guessing.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-11955541104372286052021-05-03T16:12:26.992-04:002021-05-03T16:12:26.992-04:00I don't like when people just drop in. But mos...I don't like when people just drop in. But most people know this who know me and will call first. Mary Kirklandhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04991095291522043588noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-73883481128433700562021-05-03T16:08:49.368-04:002021-05-03T16:08:49.368-04:00She's right about having a lot of public place...She's right about having a lot of public places to go when we want to find someone to chit-chat with. Every floor has a game room plus there is a large outdoor open area overlooking the lake that will have winter heaters, two restaurants and an area around the mailboxes. The the sales office will be turned into a places for groups and classes to meet and, of course the gym.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-58447438245708843922021-05-03T14:14:04.462-04:002021-05-03T14:14:04.462-04:00No one drops in on anyone else around here. I mea...No one drops in on anyone else around here. I mean, since we moved here 20+ years ago that hasn't happened. It's not the done thing. I'll admit that I like your soon-to-be neighbors preemptive approach to making sure people don't bother her. She's onto something. Ally Beanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17017098395188176477noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-31895323211144441562021-05-03T12:22:33.089-04:002021-05-03T12:22:33.089-04:00That does seem like prudent advice, since I'll...That does seem like prudent advice, since I'll be living in closer proximity to others than I ever had since living in dorm at college. Having a core group of friends is such a treasure. I'm happy that you have that.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-80298733053227648212021-05-03T10:40:26.253-04:002021-05-03T10:40:26.253-04:00If it was me, I would stay in guard dog mode, Jean...If it was me, I would stay in guard dog mode, Jean. The majority of people seem to only think of getting their own needs met rather than considering other's thoughts, feelings and schedules first. At least that's how I see it. In fact one of my first "tests" in meeting new people is how considerate they are. If they are more like the former than the latter, they proceed no The Widow Badasshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08671005744535263644noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-2052563365563649472021-05-03T08:56:12.771-04:002021-05-03T08:56:12.771-04:00It's going to be interesting and because we...It's going to be interesting and because we'll all be new in the building we'll be setting the standard for the future, I suspect. <br /><br />Cell phones do make it easy to call ahead, even if you want to stop by on a whim. Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-40914091731388460092021-05-03T08:47:39.781-04:002021-05-03T08:47:39.781-04:00I think we are much alike. Even if it is short not...I think we are much alike. Even if it is short notice, these days it seems like a call ahead is always a possibility. And especially in times of Virus. I don't mind so much going to the door and it's a neighbor who needs something. But I rarely invite in unless I'm as bored as the person who stopped by. I can see why in the case of a communal living situation, that would be a Jeaniehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17482528482559445943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-77516518554018943812021-05-02T19:07:39.476-04:002021-05-02T19:07:39.476-04:00That's the kind of neighbors I like...the wave...That's the kind of neighbors I like...the wave and smile with an occasional talk outside.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-14434381239308260642021-05-02T17:08:03.049-04:002021-05-02T17:08:03.049-04:00I am a waver - always have been. All of our old fa...I am a waver - always have been. All of our old family movies have us walking towards the camera, and I am always grinning and waving! But I don't invite a lot of people inside.Ellen D.https://www.blogger.com/profile/03776803182673252265noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-61329526962267577052021-05-02T09:03:20.233-04:002021-05-02T09:03:20.233-04:00My husband had a neighbor who would walk around th...My husband had a neighbor who would walk around the house looking in windows if he didn't answer the door. There was no hiding out or privacy when they knew he was home. Takes all kinds and I'd like your neighbor, too. Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-46650961274572277212021-05-02T08:36:26.653-04:002021-05-02T08:36:26.653-04:00Even family doesn't drop in without a text or ...Even family doesn't drop in without a text or phone call. It's common courtesy. I had a neighbor who simply did not answer her door if she wasn't expecting anyone. She didn't care if they could see her car there or her through the window. I miss her. She had a lot of sass.Nancehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17627214346956206283noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-55748494157043206672021-05-02T07:23:57.136-04:002021-05-02T07:23:57.136-04:00People borrowing trucks to move or pick up somethi...People borrowing trucks to move or pick up something was common since we always had multi-trucks and my husband was generally glad to help close friends and family. But it's interesting that few people offered money for gas/time, but there was often pizza involved so fun was involved afterward. That kind of borrowing is different than the weekly vacuum cleaner that sometimes didn't get Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-25439027774709720092021-05-01T23:40:40.573-04:002021-05-01T23:40:40.573-04:00Well, Pandemic may have Solved the dilemma of Invi...Well, Pandemic may have Solved the dilemma of Inviting people randomly inside our Homes? If someone knocks on my Door now, I have a Basket of Clean Masks right there and put one on, then don't open the Door all the way and so far it works Fine. *LOL* I'm a lot more Sociable than The Man, I don't mind Company if it's someone I know well and have an inkling of their habits and a Bohemianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03743017084098726581noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-7518668699814550072021-05-01T21:02:31.175-04:002021-05-01T21:02:31.175-04:00Following your instincts to "disengage" ...Following your instincts to "disengage" makes good sense.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-86562350126189481972021-05-01T20:43:17.015-04:002021-05-01T20:43:17.015-04:00Her advice isn't always practical at all, she ...Her advice isn't always practical at all, she has some fairly crazy notions, and I've certainly disengaged with her more and more via email/phone. Much of her advice/ideas come from her "assuming" a lot of things including monetary and of course my living alone...Catherine - Mixed Media Artist https://www.blogger.com/profile/00078469979235492814noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-46424572923621565632021-05-01T20:22:09.662-04:002021-05-01T20:22:09.662-04:00That would work! LOLThat would work! LOLMisadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-23280214771421675322021-05-01T20:20:02.024-04:002021-05-01T20:20:02.024-04:00I'm the last one who should be giving advice o...I'm the last one who should be giving advice on this topic but sometimes people force us into being direct. Maybe say something like, "I don't do well with unexpected visitors anymore. Please contact me before coming over so we can set up a time that works for both of us." <br /><br />From what you're saying is sounds like she's appointed herself to check up on you for Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-23452579222866976192021-05-01T19:49:00.557-04:002021-05-01T19:49:00.557-04:00I do not like unexpected or univited guests just l...I do not like unexpected or univited guests just like my parents,who at times when seeing a certain neighbourapproaching would walk out get in the car and go out just to avoid them. Jo-Anne's Ramblingshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11418152399382818709noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-63425081122663035542021-05-01T19:37:43.857-04:002021-05-01T19:37:43.857-04:00I don't care to "drop in" or have pe...I don't care to "drop in" or have people just "drop in" either but in the last year or two a now rather "interfering person (once was good friend) drops in unexpectedly and I haven't had the heart yet to say "go away"...and if I'm not here she will email me to say "I came but you are obviously better as you weren't there" ... I'm Catherine - Mixed Media Artist https://www.blogger.com/profile/00078469979235492814noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-20721271945422378442021-05-01T18:31:17.063-04:002021-05-01T18:31:17.063-04:00Me neither on the dropping by unannounced. I think...Me neither on the dropping by unannounced. I think neighborhoods that have porches kind of have an unspoken rule that if you're on the porch it's okay to come sit with them awhile. My deck will invite conversations, I'm thinking because I'll be right near the entry way to the building...chosen for gone-bu-not-forgotten Levi.<br /><br />I'm kind of guessing with everyone movingMisadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.com