tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post7403497599835565127..comments2024-03-28T20:40:18.960-04:00Comments on The Misadventures of Widowhood: Fourth Sadiversary on Widowhood LaneMisadventures of Widowhoodhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-38727164742925801792016-06-12T10:05:37.492-04:002016-06-12T10:05:37.492-04:00Thank you for commenting! Connecting with others w...Thank you for commenting! Connecting with others who understand makes a real difference.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-33730714482406949672016-06-12T05:25:32.732-04:002016-06-12T05:25:32.732-04:00I'm a widower who's about to hit my five-y...I'm a widower who's about to hit my five-year mark in a few weeks. I'm glad I found this post.<br /><br />I like your observation: "They both take me to the same place but 'acceptance' is a glass-is-half-full way to look at where I'm at and 'resignation' is the half-empty-glass." It is a good analogy for what T. S. Eliot describes as "wavering Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-23221706077724054942016-01-20T12:28:26.715-05:002016-01-20T12:28:26.715-05:00I'm so sorry to hear about your brother. I hop...I'm so sorry to hear about your brother. I hope you are at least writing for your eyes only. Writers need that outlet when we're facing such life chancing issues.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-51331493422312362232016-01-20T12:09:54.772-05:002016-01-20T12:09:54.772-05:00I've hit a dry spell....I really and truly hav...I've hit a dry spell....I really and truly have to be more disciplined to write even when I don't feel like it, but well, the thing is, my brother is likely in his final days after a long cancer battle and I cannot write about that yet because he and his family have asked me not to (he won't see this post to YOUR blog, however). Whenever I think of something else to write about, it donnajurenehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10799559087972759233noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-89519366805547090692016-01-20T11:41:34.729-05:002016-01-20T11:41:34.729-05:00I've missed your blogs! We inspire each other....I've missed your blogs! We inspire each other. My paints are do from FedEx tomorrow! Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-47727128200031796852016-01-20T11:27:37.580-05:002016-01-20T11:27:37.580-05:00You are my inspiration. WOW is YOU! Holding you ...You are my inspiration. WOW is YOU! Holding you in tender friendship -- friend I've never met...donnajurenehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10799559087972759233noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-28005815143619546292016-01-15T10:40:08.478-05:002016-01-15T10:40:08.478-05:00I'm just the opposite. Inner doubt makes me mo...I'm just the opposite. Inner doubt makes me more creative (not less) because I push harder. Too much confidence makes me lazy and less likely to look for those tweaks that make all the difference. For me, creativity is a dragon to slay and not always a joyful process. You, on the other hand, seem to be saying you do your best stuff when you're inspired and are approaching it joyfully.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-37173841146037130142016-01-14T19:23:26.861-05:002016-01-14T19:23:26.861-05:00I've known artist's block all too well. I ...I've known artist's block all too well. I have to keep the inner critic outside the door, and instead, bring the 'inner angel' in with me. The former raises self doubt; the latter brings inspiration to express oneself most clearly. With inner confidence, creativity is a joy. (You probably have this down, as a writer.)GowitheFlohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01842273685414939160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-18851412291631094512016-01-14T15:52:45.093-05:002016-01-14T15:52:45.093-05:00I laughed right out loud at the Midwife Room. I ai...I laughed right out loud at the Midwife Room. I ain't birthing no babies in there, ma'am. I only have one wall that could be stenciled and I want to keep it open in case I want to line it up with canvases. You'll see what I mean when I do my weekend photo tour.<br /><br />The other Jean (stepintofuture) is one smart lady. Acceptance is the best way to reframe how I feel rather than Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-14869286055460286532016-01-14T13:51:22.092-05:002016-01-14T13:51:22.092-05:00I feel sad, too, in a resigned kind of way, that m...I feel sad, too, in a resigned kind of way, that moving toward family may not be all its cracked up to be. I agree with Jean - reframing resignation as 'acceptance' emphasizes this fact (and this is true for all of us): the woman you are has such intrinsic value, that any place you lay your head is fortunate to have you. <br /><br />I love the term you are using to describe your fifth GowitheFlohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01842273685414939160noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-51441645561384854852016-01-13T23:51:52.696-05:002016-01-13T23:51:52.696-05:00You make a great point about reframing my fourth y...You make a great point about reframing my fourth year as a march towards acceptance rather than resignation. They both take me to the same place but 'acceptance' is a glass-is-half-full way to look at where I'm at and 'resignation' is the half-empty-glass. <br /><br />Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-81185987053318488162016-01-13T21:54:53.101-05:002016-01-13T21:54:53.101-05:00It must have been bitter-sweet to re-read all thos...It must have been bitter-sweet to re-read all those cards and then realize you were ready to let go of them. I really appreciated your summary of your four years of widowhood. It does seem as though it would be impossible to reach contentment through desperation, so getting past the desperation is probably important. I wonder if you can reframe your "resignation" as "acceptance,&Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-86481623200908439542016-01-13T19:37:53.238-05:002016-01-13T19:37:53.238-05:00I have talked to women at the senior hall who move...I have talked to women at the senior hall who moved to be closer to their kids and, they say, it wasn't worth the effort. They either get stuck with a lot of kid and dog sitting they didn't expect or they don't see their families any more than before. It's a tough decision! Last fall I saw a couple of condos that I loved but with a dog in the winter a condo would be hard at my ageMisadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-195918872206008882016-01-13T18:16:17.367-05:002016-01-13T18:16:17.367-05:00I, too, have not experienced the loss of a spouse ...I, too, have not experienced the loss of a spouse but I understand your moving dilemma. We just went as far as putting an offer on a house (to be nearer our daughter) and then declined to pursue it. It just didn't feel right although I really liked the house, I am not really ready to leave where I am despite the fact that it is so blooming cold now that winter has decided to show up!!<br /Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-70697181669206463962016-01-13T13:26:02.332-05:002016-01-13T13:26:02.332-05:00Just keep building those good memories and don'...Just keep building those good memories and don't worry about "when the time comes..." Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-60252803137331231582016-01-13T12:46:30.291-05:002016-01-13T12:46:30.291-05:00Loss is so difficult although I've not dealt w...Loss is so difficult although I've not dealt with this kind of loss. I've said this before...I can't imagine and I'm in no hurry. Perhaps I'll get lucky and go first and never experience this heartache. Hubby always says we'll go together. Perhaps that's a good thing.<br /><br />Have a fabulous day. ☺Sandeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06785788498697004273noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-37896796165769663202016-01-13T10:39:31.204-05:002016-01-13T10:39:31.204-05:00I have Don's last pair of cowboy boots, too. A...I have Don's last pair of cowboy boots, too. After his stroke he wouldn't let me give them away and I can't do it now, either. They make me smile remembering all the good times we had when he wore them. <br /><br />Wow,"I'm going to my peace room" or "going to my sanctuary" has a great ring! I think I will do a poll.Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-34053579358606504142016-01-13T10:22:05.491-05:002016-01-13T10:22:05.491-05:00It's kind of hard for me to forget Fred's ...It's kind of hard for me to forget Fred's departure day. New Year's day. My Mother died on the Ides of March and my Daddy's funeral was on my 69th birthday. As for ridding or keeping momentos? I still have Fred's, ratty old Nike sneakers. Why those mean so much to me is beyond my knowledge, but I saw them just yesterday, in the closet, and I gave them a hug.<br /><br />Judyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03399435237919718544noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-64575734270193095902016-01-13T08:37:37.943-05:002016-01-13T08:37:37.943-05:00I'll take the hug and give it right back to yo...I'll take the hug and give it right back to you. Not sure I'd want Don's sadiversary so close to my birthday but we don't get to choose.<br /><br />We had neighbors once who had 3 kids under 12. She died 2 days before Christmas then two years later the dad killed himself on her sadiversary. Talk about a ruined holiday! You've got to keep moving forward in grief recovery---not Misadventures of Widowhoodhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17262709452281226620noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5990351249805345004.post-34185428940167145252016-01-13T01:26:21.928-05:002016-01-13T01:26:21.928-05:00You're so brave. I haven't looked at the ...You're so brave. I haven't looked at the cards since then. Maybe this year I will. Mr. Ralph's death is a Red Letter Day ... the day after my birthday! What a win/win. Celebrate getting another year older then celebrate missing my man. I do cherish waking up each day, especially in Paradise. I love having a day to remember the saddest day in my life. And remembering the best The Awkward Widowhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03729456066739275695noreply@blogger.com