Silly Saturday and Secrets

I’ve got a tiny, voice activated tape recorder and I used to joke that it was part of my spy equipment. Not that I’ve ever been a spy any place other than in my imagination and in the spoof obituary/booklet that I wrote about myself 2-3 years ago. So what did I use it for? The truth is boring compared to the spy lie. Back when I was shepherding my dad and then my husband around in the medical community I used that recorder to tape doctor appointments. There was no way I was going to remember what was said and neither one of the guys in my life were in a position to recall those conversations. I dug that recorder out recently, thinking I was going to put it by my bed to see if I snore. I suspect I do because there’s got to be a reason why the dog leaves the bedroom part way through the night to sleep on the couch in the living room. It’s on my night table but I’m almost afraid to power it up. I have so many vivid dreams that I’m scared I’ll record some of the conversations I have in the dark of night. What if my voice isn’t the only one I pick up? I know I’m talking to someone, I’ve woke myself up doing that.

I jumped the gun before using the recorder and bought a couple of products that are supposed to help with snoring. First I tried Theravent Snore Therapy Strips. It’s like a bandage that fits over your nostrils with mesh in the center. Wearing one makes you look like you’ve got a pig’s snout. I didn’t like the feeling of having my air flow ‘regulated’ which was its whole purpose. Next I tried Snore Stopper, a little silicone device that looks like two tiny cone-shaped baskets connected by a strip of silicone. You shove the baskets up your nose and surprise, surprise they actually stay in all night long. I’ve been a mouth breather for many years and I was actually shocked at how much air that little device helped me breathe through my nose. If it didn’t look so silly I’d be tempted to wear it in the day time. Hint to an entrepreneur: make one of these with a jewelry-like loop instead of the silicone bridge that shows when it’s inserted. I could bedazzle one myself---they come in a four pack---if I had a glue gun and some glitter, but with my luck someone would make me laugh and I’d end up snorting glitter up in places it doesn’t belong and then snoring would be the least of my troubles. My Fitbit likes the Snore Stopper. It records less restless sleep when I've got the baskets up my nose.

My house cleaner/grad student artist came this week. You can tell she doesn’t do as good of a job as my last girl because she clocks a good 30-45 minutes less time on her sheet. I don’t care. She’s so upbeat and I love our conversations plus she hugs me good-bye. We talked a little about art and I was telling her about a style change I’m thinking of making because cataracts are probably messing with my color sense. “Try it,” she says, “I tell my students the only wrong way to do art is to stop.” That advice could apply to a lot of stuff we do in life, couldn’t it.

This week my Gathering Girls pals had another one of our two hour brunches. As per the norm for our group we laughed a lot which put me in a silly mood. When our cancer patient said she sold her kitchen table, I couldn’t help asking, “You’re never going to eat again?” Everyone laughed, thank goodness. She’s lost a lot of weight and we all knew she has no appetite. Come to find out, her daughter is house-hunting for a bigger place so they can move in together thus her son has started putting some of her furniture on Craig’s list. After she left our group, the rest of us talked about the timing of a move like that. One person said no one should make an important decision like that while going through cancer treatment, another person said she’s probably scared and it gives her comfort to know she won’t be alone. I agreed with both of them but house hunting, moving and chemo piled on top of each other is a Stress Sundae if I ever saw one. 

Speaking of secret lives---I wasn’t? Well, I am now. I’ve been working on a project that I can’t share with the world thus I can’t talk about it with my blogger friends and that kills me. But trust me when I say it’s been taking up a lot of my time and won't come to an end for several months. And here you probably thought there wasn’t any details of my life that I don’t upchuck for public consumption. So why did I bring it up? I don’t know but should probably call my niece and tell her. Someone besides the dog should know in case I die before Project Get-it-Done is finish. 

Change of topics: with any luck my painter will show up today to give me an estimate and put me on his schedule to get my bedroom and bathroom painted. Spring is coming; I need my Beach-Cottage-Bedroom project behind me. When the good weather comes, I want to play……. ©