Hissy-Fits Do Work and the Power of Leg Warmers

After the third canceled appointment by the flooring company who needed to clean up a bunch of construction glue in my apartment, I decided I needed to take a page out of my neighbor’s book and have a hissy-fit at the main office. Only instead of me going to the CEO’s office and doing it in person I sent an email because, let’s face it, I write better than I talk on my feet. It said: “I'm getting impatient about getting my floor issue resolved. I was promised back when I made my final payment in September than the construction gunk would be off before I moved in October 5th. (It goes from one wall to another and wouldn't come off with Brad's power cleaner. It was better but still a mess.) I'd like to start inviting some friends over but the minute I do is when the floor company will want to me dissemble my living area so they can do whatever needs to be done….” and so on. I didn’t say that I knew from the maintenance man that the floor company got pulled off from looking at my floor and coming up with a plan because the CEO prioritized getting new flooring down in a couple of empty condos over my floor clean up project.

Two days later the maintenance man tracked me down while I was making loom hats with the charity crafters and the floor company wanted to come in two hours to clean it. “No way can I be ready in two hours!” I said. “I have to unload a book case, my painting supply chest and my media cabinet full of photograph albums, then move everything out of the living room and roll the area rug back.” “I could help you,” he replied. “I’d rather pack that stuff up myself,” I answered. He flashed me a wide smile and said, “I told them that’s what you’d say. How about tomorrow?” “That works for me.” So I held my breath while he went back to the CEO’s office to firm up that appointment, hoping it wouldn’t get put off again. It didn’t.

The flooring company sent out a giant, line backer type black guy with rag, a pot scrubber and a gallon of stuff that smelled like oranges. And he got down on his hands and knees and cleaned from wall to wall, the entire 15" x 20" living room. The glue came up but the cleaner left a residue. Then the guy gave me his personal cell number and said if the maintenance people here couldn’t come mop it the next day that he’d come back on his own time and do it for me so I didn’t have to have my apartment torn apart over the weekend. But I lucked out and the “Environmental Specialist” aka house cleaner guy came within an hour of me dumping my problem on the concierge's desk. The fast service probably had everything to do with my floor getting prioritized after my modified hissy-fit. Mr. Eye Candy Cleaner, by the way, says he likes working here because “I feel the love. I’ve never had that at a job before.” Nothing keeps a bunch of old ladies happy better than guy who wears tight shirts over a well toned body. Just sayin' but I'm glad I didn't say that to him, oh my! At least the filter in my brain is still working.

While all this was going on, I got a call from The Cheerleader who was sitting across the table from me while we were making loom hats for charity. She’s been asked to quarantine for five days, even thought she tested negative. She’d been exposed briefly to someone who has a full blown case of covid-19. Both of us wore our masks while we were making hats and we'd both been fully vaccinated and had our booster shots but this new variation is so contagious! I guess if the CDC thought the people The Cheerleader sat with the next day were in any danger they would have called me directly...still might if she develops symptoms. She just wanted me to know what was going on because rumors fly and she feels, and I agree, that it shouldn’t be a secret who gets quarantined and why.

New topic: It’s 15 degrees here in Michigan right now and I’m freezing my tush off. Actually, that’s not true. My butt rarely gets cold but my fingers, legs, toes, ears and face sure do. I wear silk long underwear and fingerless gloves in the house. I also wear leg warmers 24/7 and I have a habit of not remembering to take them off when I hop in the shower. Removing soaking wet leg warmers is not easy and it’s a good thing I have four pair because those suckers take a long time to dry. 

I thought when I moved to this place I wouldn’t struggle to stay warm in the winters like I did in my old house with all the windows. Sandwiched in between to two other apartments I thought there’d be no heat loss here but I didn’t count on this place having the heat registers at ceiling height. Didn’t science established centuries ago that heat rises? Who decided in a cold climate like Michigan that it was a good idea to put the heat sources up high? Bean counters, that’s who! If I was smart I’d keep one of those hats made for charity and wear it in the house, too, but a google search on how much body heat I’d save if I did that debunked what our mothers told us growing up. We don’t lose half our body heat through our heads. 

We must forgive our moms for spreading that falsehood, though, because they got it from an old Army field manual. I can, however, testify in a court if necessary that wearing leg warmers to bed is far superior to wearing socks. Socks tend to come off during the night or start pinching my toes or twist around enough that they wake me up. The short, 8” style leg warmers don’t. (The longer ones I wear if I'm going to be outside.) The only negative is you’d have to take a time machine back to the ‘80s to buy the shorties. Flashdance, Foot Loose and Jane Fonda had most of us all wearing leg warmers back then. Now, only the cool kids do and old ladies who never stopped wearing them. ©