Google came out with its list of the most searched words for 2022 and Wordle came in first. As usual I’m running behind the eight ball because it took that list for me to finally jump on the band wagon and try playing the New York Time’s daily word game, Wordle. Oh look at me, I just used not one but two worn out metaphors in the same sentence. “Behind the eight ball” is urban speak for “at a disadvantage” which is where I thought my creative, dyslexia driven spelling would put me if I followed the crowd and start doing what everyone else has been raving about doing for this past year.
Hooked that’s what I am now after a week of playing it every day. I’ve even learned how to cheat by playing as a guest on my Kindle and playing with an account on the Times site on my computer. That gives me double the guesses to solve the puzzle. After a few days of playing the game I found another site where you can play Wordle unlimited times every day. And the another 'cheat site' that is for people who play Scrabble but it’s godsend for solving Wordle. Usually I’m able to get the correct word on the third try using that WordTips site and sometimes by the fifth try not cheating at all. I don’t know if working Wordle will help me improve my spelling skills but it can’t hurt. At my age, any brain exercise I get is a good thing.
I’m not bragging when I say this but I think I do plenty of exercise for my brain. I read and discuss books with others, I play solitary and spider every day. I play Mahjong once a week. I write nearly every day and spend time on the computer with all the issues that entails when things go wrong. I don’t depend on a calculator to do the math that comes with living a normal life.
But when it comes to the other kind of exercise---the kind that requires us to move our bodies---I’m a dismal failure. And I have no excuse. I have a fully equipped workout room steps away from my apartment door and all kinds of free classes I could be working into my weekly schedule. If I’d seriously try to become a morning person I could make it to the cardio boxing, cardio drumming, sit and stretch or balance classes at the crack of too-damn-early. I did try them all when I first moved in but the afternoon Tai Chi is the only class I make it to, at least on an inconsistent basis. Don't even mention afternoon line dancing. I trip over my own feet too often to try that again---did a class and loved it in my forties.
But I’m a creature of habit if nothing else and it’s the beginning of January so I’ll bet you know where this is going. Yup, since I was in my early teens I’ve started a diet and exercise plan in the new year that will no doubt peter out by the end of February. And boy, do I ever need it this year! The holidays with all the extra foods and drinks around here put ten pounds on me since Thanksgiving and I need to get that back off before I outgrow my clothes. My first indication that I would honor this time tested tradition of all fatty-fatty-two-by-fours was when I found my jumping on the rowing machine across the hall every day. We have a TV in there so it’s been surprisingly easy to pop in there on the way home from going to the main building and I've been watching the 2023 version of Ground Hog Day, starring Kevin McCarthy trying to get enough votes to be the Speaker of the House.
I’ve also started eating lunch AND dinner again. I have/had a bad habit of going all day long without eating then from dinner on I’d make up for lost time, eating too many calories close to bedtime. I’m ordering soup for lunch and salads for dinner and I’ve already lost my first two pounds of my ten pound goal. If you saw my photo on the Christmas post you know I have far more than ten pounds to lose but right now I just want my clothes not to feel so tight.
New topic: One of my readers cautioned me not to describe my trips down to visit the Memory Care building out of respect for the residents and their families and it was easy enough to omit my infrequent interactions down there before my brother moved in. But I'm visiting several times a week now which makes it a bigger part of my life so from time to time I will be including a few of those experiences in my blog. Like today. My brother didn’t think his phone was working so I used my cell to call his landline. After he answered and we exchanged greetings I said, “Your phone is working so let's hang up now.”
“Don’t do that!” he said, “I want to talk to you.”
“I’m right here in the room with you,” I replied. “What do you want to talk to me about?”
So we had a good five minute conversation, all the time with me standing on the other side of the room and him talking into the phone.” It was crazy and funny and makes me smile every time I think about it. It's also a perfect example of the type of things I’m looking for every day to fulfill my New Year’s Resolution of finding the sweet moments in every day. My brother and I laughed a lot that day and the phone conversation was a sweet take-away.
Visiting a memory care aka dementia ward can make you sad but a visit can also make you feel good about helping someone touch bases with pieces of who they used to be. My brother and I have had some good conversations based on what I call my Show & Tells---objects, photos or readings that I bring with me. Even without a Show & Tell just helping a loved one do things like find their glasses or work their phone is a huge deal for someone who lives a small life in dementia care. ©
That's a sweet story about your brother. Thank you for sharing it. About exercise --- the only time I stream videos is when I exercise. It's a great habit.
ReplyDeleteI admire anyone who can stream exercise videos and do it on a regular basis. It's my greatest shames that I can't/haven't made that sort of thing a life-long habit.
DeleteGroundhog Day starring Kevin McCarthy. Hahaha. The number of concessions he made to get the Speaker role is going to cause complete chaos. The radicals will be leading him around on a leash.
ReplyDeleteI LOVE Wordle and do it every morning. A two or three line solution absolutely makes my day.
Finally, I am visiting my DD and family in England at the moment and am grateful they have no scale. And the weather is cold and rainy most days, so my walking is limited to trips to the grocery store when we get a break. She has a broken ankle and has graduated from a hard cast to an air boot, but there is still much for this mum to do around the house. I am hoping that helps but I have my doubts.
Hope Springs
I have no doubt having her mom around helps your daughter. You've got her back and that's a big deal. I'm sure you raised her to be self-efficient even when dealing with something like a broken ankle but we all want our mom's in times like that.
DeleteOh, yes, Kevin might be speaker but that doesn't mean a small number of radicals wouldn't be leading him around by the nose.
I'm anxious to learn if others use the Scrabble site (or others like that) to help solve Wordle.
I'm a big Wordle fan, too. Surely all those brain games help us (let's keep telling ourselves that). Some days it's just fun to get lost in word play, sudoku, etc.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on a two pound loss. I gained over the holidays and have tried to start cutting back. About the only way my husband and I can lose is by eating a healthy breakfast and a late lunch (soups/salads/simple stuff) around 2 or 3 in the afternoon. Then we try to stop eating for the day. Not always easy. However, since we've eaten through the fudge, peanut clusters and Christmas cookies, it's getting easier.
I appreciate what you share about the Memory Care Unit. Since most of my relatives died fairly young, I have very little experience when it comes to any type of care facilities. I teared up over the story of your brother telling you to stay on the phone because he wanted to talk to you. Really, really sweet. Hold onto to that memory, Jean.
My brother still has his sense of humor although the phone conversation wasn't meant to be funny. And sometimes when he smiles I see the boy I grew up with and that just does something to me inside. I should probably talk with my nieces before I write too much about him in Memory Care but I'm guessing they know my writing style well enough not to have a problem with it.
DeleteIt is nice that you and your brother can spend time together and share memories and laughs. A treat for both of you!
ReplyDeleteYes, so far the good outweighs the sad.
DeleteI love Wordle and do it every day, keeping track of my streaks. I've only lost twice, and if I forget to do the puzzle and ruin my streak, I really get annoyed. I had no idea there were cheat or help sites, but I wouldn't use them anyway.
ReplyDeleteA couple days ago, I tossed out all the remaining Xmas treats in the house to remove all temptations. I immediately felt Relief. If it's not there, I won't eat it, right?
I love the story of you and your brother and the phone. So loving and sweet. Those are the Moments That Matter.
You don't always get sweet moments while visiting a Memory Care unit, but it's important for visitors to mark them when we do get them because they will keep us going.
DeleteI wish I'd asked everyone who reads this post to share their starter word for Wordle. I'm getting better at it and don't always need the cheat site. But I have no shame in using it when needed, because I think it's actually helping to exercise my brain.
I have yet to play Wordle. I think I am the only person in Canada that hasn't played it yet š. That's such a cute story of you and your brother chatting on the phone. I say there is nothing wrong with giving us slices of life from the memory care unit. You will always do it with respect and love; I think I know that much about you.
ReplyDeleteDeb
Thanks for the last few sentences above. I felt the same way about me being the last person around not to play Wordle. But I don't understand how anyone can play just one game a day and be satisfied. I play about ten a day on the alternate site.
DeleteI'm very glad you share your information and experiences in visiting the Memory care unit. Many of us haven't had that experience and it's important that we hear about it, learn about it. Apart from your brother, you mention no people specifically (and who would know them anyway?) so I don't think privacy is an issue here in any way. You are dealing with your personal experience and if it's fine with your brother (and I suspect he doesn't care a hoot) then well done. It's enlightening and educational.
ReplyDeleteAs for wordle, I'm hooked, too. I try not to use the other sources, even if it takes me more times, though I have opened the scrabble dictionary more than once as I've neared the limit! Have you don't spelling bee too? That's my other fave!
I had described someone in Memory Care in a previous post that reminded a reader of her dad and it made her feel bad, but like you said no one knows specifically who I'd be writing about---just like here where I live.
DeleteI never here of 'Spelling Bee' and taking a quick glance at it I don't think I'm ready for that. I'm just proud of myself for trying Wordle.
I hear you about the holiday calories. Something that rings in my ears - it's not what we eat between Christmas & New Year but what we eat between New Year & Christmas. I'm more committed to movement these days after holiday indulgence. Such a touching story about your brother on the phone. My mom has dementia. One day she held out a banana & asked, "What is this?" and another day she recalled the words of Desiderata. Go figure. I play a form of wordle called wordley. My starter words are adieu and poise.
ReplyDeleteDementia really is like that, isn't it. One day you get Desiderata and the next you get the heart-wrenching stuff. The hardest part is accepting the ups and downs, knowing the over-all trajectory is not hopeful.
DeleteI have used 'adieu' but not 'poise.' I usually start 'pearl' then 'hound' but have not found either of my words on the lists of the best starter words.
Wordle is fun but I don't always get it. As for not talking about going to see your brother, if you want to share about him then why wouldn't you? How would that be disrespectful to other people in that area? I don't see the problem.
ReplyDeleteYou'll have to decide for yourself if I was disrespectful. Re-reading the post in question where I wrote about Memory Care I can see how some might see it that way. https://misadventuresofwidowhood.blogspot.com/search?q=Tim+Conway
DeleteI do Wordle every day, but since my brain tells me I should be awake from about 10:30 pm to 1:30 am, I usually do it as soon as the clock turns to midnight. I first started out with "adieu" as my starting word, but if the eventual word doesn't have a "d" in it, then you're left with no consonants to guide you. Remember when you were in school, trying to take quick notes, and you made up your own shorthand? I usually left out all the vowels when I could. So, I prefer a mix of vowels and commonly used consonants. I use "yeast." I don't use Scrabble and didn't know about it. If I'm on the last line, I might use tryhardguides Wordle solver, but since I'm competing with myself, I try not to do that. If I feel a need to veg out with more "Wordle" type puzzles, I use "Word Master" that lets you work as many five-letter Wordle-type puzzles day as you want.
ReplyDeleteI personally am glad for your glimpses of the Memory unit. My mother-in-law was showing signs of the dementia that her mother had but refusing to go to assisted living, which she still would have qualified for. She fell inside her home and broke her hip, and was unable to get up until her daily carer got there. In the hospital, she slugged nurses and my husband, bringing back memories of his childhood abuse. She tried to pull the little fingers of the nurses back and screamed all day long. The hospital gave us 24 hours to find a place for her when it was determined the fracture was stable, but it was the first of several. As the ambulance came to get her, she sobered and asked my husband, "I'm never going to go home again, am I?" We tried recording her favorite music, everything we could think of, but she continued to scream, attempting to hurt nurses and even scooting out of a chair and pretending to fall. At the time, I was going through the first of two brain surgeries, so my husband's brother often had to tend to it alone since my mother-in-law lived several hours away. I kept feeling as if we'd all gotten on a speeding train and couldn't get off. My dad died similarly, two weeks after his "forgetfulness" suddenly accelerated into full-blown dementia. Both of these people had refused assisted living because of the cost. I'm glad to see a different way, with different choices.
Thanks for all the insight on Wordle. I'm getting better and using the cheat sites less often.
DeleteI went to a support group here on campus for dementia families and they brought up how often the staff has to deal with abuse. She said they are now offering their staff support and training on how to handle it. She said for those who dealt with abuse in their childhoods it was especially hard to relive those emotions. None of us knows how we will be if we get dementia but I sure hope I'm as easy to handle as my dad was. Families like yours sure go through a lot to try to safely care for a parent in their own home and that's not always the best choice even if it's the only choice they have.
I couldn't make it through one word on Wordle because of a low tolerance for frustration, but I can spend days trying to get something to look right in a painting. Go figure!
ReplyDeletePhysical descriptions of people in cognitive decline might seem more disrespectful than recounting interactions, but it's part of the whole picture. Not talking about the burgeoning reality of dementia isn't going to make it go away. So I'm sympathetic to anyone who might be triggered by a description, but I also have read enough of you to know that wasn't your intent.
No, it wasn't my intent but hurting someone unintentionally feels the same to them. Fortunately for my writing, the people in Memory Care here are dressed nicely. I remember my dad in Hospice and my mother-in-law in a nursing home always ended up with other peoples ill-fitted clothes which added to the look of cognitive decline.
DeleteI doubt Wordle will become a life long habit but I'm enjoying the fact that I can do it at all.
Dementia is horrible for all involved saw my grandmother go through it
ReplyDeleteYou got that right!
DeleteI don't think you are EVER disrespectful in your writing. Word games forever! Wordle is still tough for me. I also do the short NYT Crossword. Have you tried WordScape? Letterpress is also fun although you need a friend (I'm willing!)
ReplyDeleteMy Mom would write a big word across the top of our piece of paper and we would all scramble to see who got the most words just using those letters. Kept all of us pretty quiet in the car!
Thank you for that first sentence.
DeleteYour mom was smart and that was probably good practice for playing Scramble.
I enjoy your vignettes of memory care. My mom was in memory care and your stories are true and heartfelt, I see nothing offensive about them. As for Wordle, my first word is usually Tears or Stare, same letters, two ways, ha! If you want more Wordle, there's Dordle (2 games), Quordle (4), Octordle (8) and Sedecordle (16). Not as hard as they sound. Good luck on healthy eating, I'm headed down that road myself.
ReplyDeleteI'm starting to see where the second word is as important than the first. Using the same letters for both in a different order makes sense if you get a few hits with the first. Thanks for the additional site to try.
DeleteI enjoy your descriptions of your living situation and your brother’s. You are visiting family, sharing observations of his world now. I love Wordle, my first word is smile (I am afraid to change it now) and second word is throw. I heard someone else’s is Prion, which I feel will never be a chosen word. I stumbled onto the site Wordle Solver by WordFinder. Even though I am getting help, I am still doing a lot of the letter solving myself, so I feel I am getting my brain exercise! Deana
ReplyDeleteI think the first word is supposed to be filled with the most frequently used letters but I have no clue about the math of letters. I like 'smile' ...a good way to start the game. A agree on getting help to solve Wordle gives us brain exercise just as much if not more than just trying to guess words.
DeleteForgive me commenting anonymous but I'm at the Emergency room with the Man and no computer access. The story with your Dear Brother made me Smile...so sweet and I've experienced some of the sweet crazy moments too with loved ones...makes for a special story to share. I'm needing exercise too but won't go until I get the shoulder looked at...but aching to go to the new Gym regularly. Loved to when we had membership years ago. Dawn the Bohemian
ReplyDeleteSo sorry your husband is in ER! To bad they don't have punch cards for frequent users with a free visit every 12th time someone in your family goes.
DeleteThe sweet moments with dementia patients don't happen as often as the other kind so I'm determined to notice and document when they happen with my brother.
I don't play Wordle as I don't know enough about it to even try it. But I do need to comment on dementia. I had a full-blown emotional break down yesterday, crying and sobbing my heart out. My husband has dementia and I realized, quite suddenly, that 'he' was no longer there--his body is there, but his persona is history. We'd gone shopping with the niece and our younger son. When we arrived back at the house, I was trying to get out of the back seat and I watched as my husband got himself out of the front seat of the car, closed the door and headed to the house. Never a glance in my direction... nothing... it's like I didn't exist. Other times, he panics when he doesn't know where I am. Even though I'm in the house, he has to know EXACTLY where I am at all times. It was such a shocking revelation to know that he's in a world to himself and nothing and no one lives there with him. I love him, but have lost him... After reading this, I realized that I left out part of the story. I had both of my hands full and was waiting for my husband to come around and help me out of the car. It never happened... it was like he'd forgot I was even in the car. I was dumbfounded... So many things--little things, big things... over and over and over again. Sorry for the rant...
ReplyDeleteDon't apologize! Rants help us let out steam and living with someone with dementia isn't easy. It's HARD watching the changes in personality, isn't it, and as your husband's caregiver everything decision large and small falls on you. I've heard of other dementia patients who have to know where their spouses are at all times. I think it's fear factor for them, the spouse helps ground them. If you live in an area that has a dementia support group for families, it might help you to go or at least find one online.
DeleteI used to play Wordle, until the NYT put it behind a paywall. Then, I did without, until I found this site. Now, I can play as many times a day as I want! I skip some days, but some days I'll play three or four in a row. Great fun.
ReplyDeleteMy favorite still is Scrabble, but I can't find anyone to play with me. They al want to play Words With Friends, and I'm just not into that. I did notice Jeanie's mention of something called Spelling Bee. I might look that one up. I loved our vocabulary and spelling drills in school, and our in-class spelling bees. That one might be double fun.
I've never played Word with Friends and I never will. Scrabble is a game I absolutely hated playing back when I was a younger and I refuse to play it now. Thanks for the new link. I'm improving at Wordle faster than I would have ever imagined.
DeleteHope you love Spelling Bee as much as Jeanie does.
@Shoreacres: Spelling Bee is behind a paywall like for Wordle. If you like to play Scrabble, here's a link to Outspell, which is just like it but you're playing against a computer and can pick the degree of difficulty. There are ads but it's free otherwise. I always play the hard choice and sometimes it's a real challenge. https://www.arkadium.com/games/outspell/
DeleteI also play Killer Wordle (killerwordle.com) where only correct letter choices show up and now Septle (septle.com) which takes 7 letters rather than 5.
I lost a couple of pounds over the holidays but it wasn't from trying to. I was on Cephalexin 3 x a day for 10 days, prescribed by my dermatologist after my Mohs surgery on my leg, and it made everything I ate taste like metal. That and the fact that I may have had Covid just before Thanksgiving, though I tested negative. My sense of taste is slowly coming back but my favorite food, chocolate, still tastes weird. Noooo!
ReplyDeleteThat's not a fun way to lose weight! But I'm kind of wishing my doctor had prescribed something for me to take after my Moh surgery. Mine is still a large, open wound and I have three weeks to go before she wanted me to send the first photo. Hope you get your taste back soon!
DeleteHe prescribed the antibiotic as a precaution, but I don't think it was really necessary. Antibiotics tend to be overused and you run the risk of developing some bugs that are resistant to them. However, I did take the full course, as prescribed, like the good girl that I am. Yucky taste and all.
DeleteI feel better now. I had a cream antibiotic.
DeleteHappy New Year Jean, like always love your blog, I l have climbed on wordle bandwagon after my niece started me on it, I usially always start with word arise then follow with canoe or mouth & then use wordhippo site to give me list of the words & then solve it in mostly 3, 4 or 5 attempts, its fun & I wait it for it to drop it at 12 on fridays or weekends otherwise first thing in the morning. my mom was diffivult patient to deal with at home though at sub acute place she is at the mercy of aids & due to language barriers she was showing lot of frustrations & sometimes very angry at us, though luckily I forced her to write one line Gods mantra in her notepad, which helped her calm down & now she is doing much better in her recovery. we all can see light at the end of the tunnel now. one of our three siblings we always try to be there with her, so things are starting to feel better & she also understands all will be well. By the way I have been doing intermittent fasting for last 2 years & have gone to my prepregnancy weight so weight I had at 28. I lost close to 40 in two years & proud of it. being just two of us at home it works out well. we only have big healthy breakfast & fruits in the afternoon & no dinner. so basically have atleast minimum of 14 hours fasting so after our fruits at 3 pm in the afternoon we directly have morning brunch at 9 am. It works out well for us, though I do have cheat day once a week where I eat dinner, and this kind of ntermittent fasting has worked for us, though we are vegetarian so eat lots of vegetables, nuts & fruits
ReplyDeleteAsha
Fasting could work for me if I learned to do it in the afternoon and evening. I don't have trouble going all day without eating but the science of fasting requires you to shift all your calories to early in the day. Congratulations on doing that and losing the weight! I need to try harder!
DeleteGlad your mom is doing a little better. Have you tried making her flash cards to help with communication/translations of common things she needs from her caregivers? I've seen little notebooks families have made up and they really help cut down on the frustration.
Canoe is a good starter word. I haven't seen mouth on any of the lists. I'll try it.
I wanted to comment on what 1st word I use for wordle. I don't always use the same word. It depends on my mood that day, but usually I'll use one of these: DREAM, CLAIM or PRIDE. It gives me a few vowels & a few other letters to work with. If none of the letters (or just 1) show up, it means I need to go in a totally different direction letter wise.
ReplyDeleteI'm having fun testing out starter words. Thanks for adding to my list.
DeleteLong time reader; first time commenter. I love your blog! I'm a geriatric social worker and one of my favorite memories is my father's insistence on a Father's Day that we visit his youngest aunt who was demented at her ALF. Your story and mine are so similiar! My sister and I were both there and hugged and kissed our aunt. Throughout the visit she kept asking "where are the girls?" "We're right here!" Every ten minutes for two hours she would ask that. It was so sweet and honestly I felt very loved. For Mother's Day we had gone on a weekend trip to a hotel we used to go to when I was a kid. Never usually did anything extra special for what my mother called "Hallmark Holidays," But that year....It turned out to be my father's last year in the only world I know. Somehow I think he knew though he was supposedly in perfect health. I can't explain how that visit and trip brought a closure I never expected. The thing about assisted living and other long term care facilities--stories are needed about them.
ReplyDeletePeople with dementia are human; we don't know what they're thinking or really how their minds work. I would never demean a person with dementia but I would want their story told. We have to learn now to understand people who have not really reverted to "childhood" but are somehow seeing another reality.
Pia Savage
Welcome and thank you for commenting! I love the term "Hallmark Holidays." Anyone whose ever seen the Hallmark channel knows exactly what that kind of weekend away would look like. Glad yours gave you an unexpected twist.
DeleteIn my limited experience with people living with dementia is no matter how far gone you think they are, they can surprise you with moments of perfect clarity, even insight. My theory is we should always assume on some level they can understand what's going on around them even if it doesn't look that way. My mom once had a medical condition where she was catatonic for 3-4 hours and when she started coming out of it the first thing she did was answer a question the doctor has asked her when he first examined her...it took that long for her brain to process what he'd asked.
I gained 5 holiday pounds when I got sick for a spell and the weather sucked so I couldn't get out for my daily walk. Grrrr.. But I have every confidence in my ability to lose it. Just not much confidence it won't happen again next year. Thanksgiving to New Years is my Binge Season! Ugh!
ReplyDeleteThis has been a terrible binge season for me. Cookies and candy all over the public areas here and too many parties. I know you'll get your five pounds off, you seem to enjoy your exercise. Me, it more like punishment.
Delete