Thursday, December 12, 2024

How I'm Surviving the Holidays


How did is get to be December already? And why have I started my annual pilgrimage to Diet and Exercise Mountain already, a full month before I'd traditionally do it?  I've got the answer to that second question. It's the fact that I've stress-eaten myself into gaining so many pounds this year that my clothes are getting uncomfortably tight and I refuse to buy a bigger size. I'm so serious about this that I'm not entering the gingerbread house building contest this year. Aside from the fact that I can't have all that candy around tempted me night after night as I'd add layer after layer of gum drops, gumballs, life savors, pretzels, cotton candy, twisted licorice, etc., etc. on a cookie house put together with Royal Icing. I also want to give some of the others residents at my CCC a chance to place in the winner's circle this year. Between shopping for just the right candy and building a gingerbread house, then decorating it, I'd be on a sugar high for over a month and once you're riding on that tiger's back it's hard to get off. And think of the money I'm saving. Gingerbread house decorating is expensive when you do things like buy a box ice cream cones because you want one to cover in spearmint leaf-shaped confectionery. Last year a bought an entire bag of something just to get a star shaped piece of candy for the top of the aforementioned Christmas tree. I need to go get on the scales. I think I gained a pound just writing this paragraph. 

Another reason why I'm not entering to contest is it's time consuming and I'm back to feeling like I'm running out of time in my old age to finish all the things that need doing and/or I want to do. Naturally, being a self-indulgent kind of person I usually end up doing the fun stuff before things like mattress turning, closet and filing cabinet purging, starting my income taxes and fine tuning my estate plans. And being a worry wart I've accumulate a lot of necessary distractions from what our reality will be after January 20th. My upstairs neighbor says she's just not going to worry about it. Easy for her to say, she's 93 and a prime candidate to be shipped off to the glue factory and she says there's nothing we can do to change things. I don't agree but that's not the post I'm writing today.

What projects are on my agenda right now? I'm working on finishing a landscape painting that I don't like but I need to cross it off the list so I can go on to a more inspiring painting, another customized paint-by-number of one of my niece's grandsons. She asked me to do it from one of her favorite photos. When I ordered the kit from the Asian import company they made it and sent it out the same day when others I've ordered from them took several weeks to product before putting it on a slow boat from China. I think they were trying to beat the coming tariff increases this time, same as me. After that is completed I want to try to repaint some of the tiles in my new 1930's Bakelite Mahjong set that my nice gifted me a couple of weeks ago. I've watched two videos on how to restore them and it doesn't look that hard to do. The only part you can't do over and over again until you get it right is putting the tiles in the oven to 'age' the ones that are lighter in color than the rest of the set. I won't be doing that on this set but I've love items made with Bakelite my entire adult life so I'm fascinated by the change-the-color-process. I might try the process on some orphan tiles I've accumulated in my hunt for one bams.

On Black Friday I took full advantage of the sales and also bid on a 1923 wooden Mahjong set. Won it! It's missing one tile that I think I can duplicate over at the wood shop and then dink around to get the aged paint color just right. But I won't let myself play around with that project until I've condensed and purged some stuff on a bookshelf in my den closet. That's my plan: for every project I do that's fun I'll alternate it with projects that need to be done, be it deep cleaning or downsizing here in the land of I won't live forever. Do I sound manic? I would be if all the plans in my head actually come to pass. They won't. But half a list accomplished is better than nothing and without a list that's what would happen.

I did manage to carry out a project for the common good here on the continuum care campus. Our mail room cabinet where we store out of seasonal decor, Mahjong sets and boxed puzzles was in desperate need of cleaning and organizing. It's always been a fight for space as the puzzle boxes seem to breed in the dark. So I took it upon myself to move the puzzles to our library---after getting permission from the woman who man's our library. She's self-appointed but was an actually librarian before retirement and she's done wonders with our library here, doubling it's size and rotating books between ours and the library in our assisted living building on campus and the county library's donation box. Book seems to breed in the dark around here, too. It felt good making space where it was needed and giving people better access to the puzzles.

I've also started gearing up for another project in the community. Starting in mid January I'm teaching three two hour classes in how to play Mahjong followed by a month of monitoring a newbie table of players during our regular club's playing time. I teach with a lot of hand-outs so I'm set up folders for the class attendees this time around. 

But the biggest thing I'm doing to get through the season is what I'm not doing. I skipped going go the choral concert, the brass band concern, the Christmas plays and live nativity, the bus tour of city lights and I won't be enjoying cookies-by-the-fireplace Christmas morning. And I didn't join the decorating committee who spent last week decking the halls with every wreath, garland, tree, ornaments, candle sticks, nativity sets, lights, reindeer and red bows on the planet. I am, however, going to the Christmas buffet, a sing-along, a cookie decorating party and the White Elephant Gift exchange. And I just returned from seeing a ballet company of girls 13 and under who performed to music from The Nutcracker. 

There truly is something for everyone to do around here and no pressure if you want to sit out any or all parts of the festivities. Well, I shouldn't say that. I've been taking heat for a week for not building a gingerbread house this year and I'd like to punch the woman who keeps nagging me about my decision. ©

34 comments:

  1. Sounds like they offer so many activities that it is good to pick and choose now that you've been there awhile. You can't do everything so you might as well do what you enjoy the most. I have lots of jobs around the house that I need to do but I'm really good at talking myself out of them. Oh well, maybe someday...(or maybe not!) ;)

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    1. It's easy to get overwhelmed when there a lot of things need doing about a house. The thing I remind myself of is that a job list never gets finished because we keep adding things as we cross others off.

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  2. I applaud your decision to pick and choose the activities you really want to take part in. You are so right about time going faster and faster. Gosh, I looked at the calendar yesterday and realized we were two weeks from Christmas! The only good thing about time getting away from me, is that I haven't made a single Christmas treat yet, and I plan to only make a few. It's the only way I avoid gaining weight over the holidays. I smiled when I read of your decision not to take part in the gingerbread house competition. I'd be sampling every single thing, too. Plus, folks will spend a fortune on candy.

    It's great that you were able to organize the puzzles/games closet and I'll bet there will lots of interest in your Mahjong classes.

    Enjoy the season, Jean!

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  3. It sounds like you have plenty to do. It's easy to fall into the trap of feeling like you have to be doing Something all the time when there are so many activities available. It's still important to have time to yourself. I get that no one wants the residents to brood or get isolated, but everyone needs some Down Time, too.

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    1. One thing that is good around here is that everyone respects your time if you're in your apartment. It's rare anyone will knock on your door. Before I moved here someone told me that was a common think in independent living places..that your private time is respected. There are so many common places to meet up and classes to go to when you're in the mood to have people around.

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    2. That's a valuable tidbit of info! I hadn't thought about it but one of my least favorite things is having my doorbell ring unexpectedly.

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  4. It sounds like you are still doing plenty, along with all the other things you want to do. You're definitely no slacker! I'm just trying to get through the holidays. Haven't baked a thing, though I might this weekend. It goes so fast this year!

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    1. You got your holiday in a different form this year....with your big trip to England, then reliving it through your writing. It's okay to sit out doing it all this year. You do so much most years!

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  5. OK, I need a nap after reading about all your plans and the activities you are going to do, never mind the ones you have crossed off your list!!! I've never understood people who keep nagging away when you've already said no. Wanted to punch one or two, myself! Including my first husband...LOL!

    Deb

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    1. This woman is relentless in her nagging and she does it it front of others. It's embarrassing. She thinks I'm shy and she's tells people she's "tooting my horn for me because I won't do it myself." We sit at the same farm table of 12 once a week and I try to sit at the opposite end where she can't annoy me with her Project Jean.

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  6. I feel like I'm going through the motions of the season, minimally, just because the calendar tells me to. Maybe by Christmas Day the spirit will hit me. Maybe not. The only thing I've really enjoyed so far was collecting a bunch of "gently used" and even new things I bought specifically for this project to donate to our local elementary school for their Holiday Shop. The PTA organizes it all for every child at the school to "shop" for up to 4 gifts to give to their family members, wrapped and ready to go. There are a significant number of lower income students at the school and this really helps them feel good to be able to get these gifts for their parents/siblings. I'd love to volunteer on the day of the event, but it always seems to coincide with our annual winter getaway for my birthday.

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    1. There is something to say about going through the motions. It can spark the holiday spirit in us. I'm hoping mine will come when I write Xmas cards this weekend. I read about your school/shopping experience and thought it was so nice. I remember my dad's union doing that one year.

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  7. We are late starting our Christmas here. But it's easier to get in the mood having kids around (14 and 11, but still excited) I started buying them Christmas Countdown calendars when they were little. Age appropriate with little toys inside. As they got bigger I bought a heart shaped box with 24 little drawers ... and didn't realize how long I would have to search for smaller things to put in. Then I did written hints on where I hid a bit bigger surprises...this year, we are back to chocolate ... check out the See's candy countdown box. I should have gotten one for each of the five of us.

    The best part? They get to open the box of the day at breakfast. Then play with their little toy and now, to eat their candy. It puts a smile on my face and fortunately, I do not have a candy tooth! Homemade cookies? My downfall.

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    1. I love those advent/Xmas countdown boxes. One of my nieces is posting her kids opening them every day. Such a nice idea and builds great memories. for the kids. We Should have them for adults too. Never too late to buy them for your daughter and S-I-L

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  8. It's been challenging for me to get into the holiday spirit this year, and like you, I'm struggling with what is coming toward us Jan 20. I try to ignore it, but that makes me feel like Nero fiddling while Rome burned. Of course, there really is nothing I can do.
    I love the number of activities you have to choose from, and I also would be cutting back to those I want to do, not the ones someone pressures me into. One of my friends said we all need to consider activities with this filter: Does this bring you joy? Or is it an obligation that makes you feel the opposite of joy? That's my motto this year.

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    1. Sometimes I'll look around and think, "how can people be so happy when things are falling apart all around us."

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  9. Why is it that we can gain weight so easily but taking it off is so hard. You have managed to do a fair bit

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  10. This was a welcome post because my method of coping is to say 'ugh' the day after Thanksgiving, and 'ahhhhhh!' on December 26th. The family get togethers are a lovely thing, but the retail aspect of it makes me crazy. How did honoring the life of an amazing human being get so twisted around?

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    1. I know! There are so many Christmas decorations everywhere here that w look like a place that sells it. So much on the schedule , too...most not related to the spirit of the holiday.

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  11. You're doing a lot more than I am! December has always been a restful time for me, and I love it. I've been thinking of your nagging neighbor. Couldn't you just say it didn't sound like fun this year? And that you do things that feed your soul, not to impress other people? How does she decide?

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    1. I'll try that line next time she brings it up. But I don't think that will work. She does this same thing with any arty or craft class or volunteer opportunity I pass up. I've tried giving her my honest reasons for not wanting to do the gingerbread house plus I've said "No! Not doing it this year."---all most to the point of being rude. I've tried to figure out why she thinks I "don't toot my own horn" as she puts it. She bugs the heck out of me because she miss-reads who I am, in my opinion.

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  12. I really laughed at your description of yourself as the nagger's "Project Jean." That's funny, and probably a good way to cope with her. I'm rather proud of myself, since I'm going to get the mailed packages on their way this Saturday. I only have three or four to send, but I'm usually running right up against the deadline. Given the state of our postal system, I want to have a little extra time for them to arrive at their destination.

    I've heard several people say they're doing less this year, and my suspicion is that the calendar has something to do with it. Advent began on the Sunday after Thanksgiving this year, and that chopped off several of the days between holidays. It certainly doesn't feel at all like the Christmas season to me, and I sort of hate that, since it's one of my favorite times of year. But, the weather has been good enough that I finished one job to day, and have a chance to finish another before Christmas Day. That means I can take off work between Christmas and the first week of the New Year, and that's not a bad gift!

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    1. That's a great gift for yourself. I've heard a lot of people around here talking about how the holiday is going fast this year. I think part of it is because we had to sit out a few holidays because of Covid and last year we were still cautious. This year it's full stops out and lots of choices for us again. We're not used to it.

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  13. Kudos to you for saying no to things. It is a skill that I do not possess, but I am trying to obtain. I was always the yes girl and I AM TIRED. I love your reward system for your projects, too. I need to finish things instead of starting new ones.
    I am so sick to my stomach about next year. I had a hard time finding any Christmas spirit. After some sleepless nights I have now thrown myself into the festivities. I am assuming that next Christmas I will be locked in my house and I will have these memories to look back on.

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    1. I got my first Christmas card in the mail and that seemed to have flipped a switch in me. I've always loved sending cards so I shopped on line for some and am looking forward to getting them from Amazon.

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  14. Since my stroke nearly 12 years ago, Christmas is no longer what it was for me. When I was about 10 I asked my dad if there was really a Santa, and he looked me in the eye and said, "Do you want there to be a Santa?" I decided I did, and so I became Santa. Until the stroke, I always got up in the middle of the night and put out presents for everyone (including me, of course!). Now, I can't get up in the middle of the night without my caregiver, and that spoils the surprise, not to mention how grumpy it would make my poor caregiver, so I've become Secret Santa, and all year long, whenever the opportunity arises, I give whatever gifts I see a need for. It's fun, in a different way, and I still enjoy it. Did you know that homeless people really appreciate new socks? That's one of the things I've learned. And that helps me get in the holiday spirit.

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    1. Christmas changes for us all as we age, but for you more than usual. Yes, I knew that about sock and underwear too. People don't donate those sorts of things. I can see how being a Secret Santa could be lots of fun. We used to pick out someone each year to give a gift to they weren't expecting, someone who was especially nice to us that year.

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  15. You certainly are keeping busy so that should keep you out of trouble should you be inclined toward that sort of thing. Avoiding goodies this time of year is very difficult. Even if I don't buy something for myself someone will end up giving me some. Rationing consuming them then becomes my challenge once I eat one of whatever it is.

    The need for me to prepare for Christmas has decreased every year for some time now. I'm down to sending no more than 4 or 5 holiday cards at best since a couple more correspondents bit the dust as have those for whom I bought gifts. No more do I have the hectic preparation times with baking and cooking, shopping in store crowds, and more. Those activities do tend to trigger a special spirit of excitement I think. But, I keep puttering away at my erratic right-sizing activities, rather content with the situation.

    Younger neighbors surprised me the other night with a plate of all sorts of home made goodies including a slice of delicious date/walnut cake her mother brought her she had made from the grandmother's recipe. As if that wasn't enough there were a couple servings of a catered Hawaiian dinner they had received. Since I no longer cook and bake I can only reciprocate with items I can order virtually but am glad there is that option -- increased options as a consequence of Covid forcing retailers to expand their businesses.

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    1. What nice neighbors you have! I live in the wrong building to get baked goods, which is both good and bad. All the bakers on my campus live across the piazza and exchange baked goods all the time. Occasionally they'll bring stuff to the cafe. But tonight the management is doing a desert party and Wednesday a Christmas buffet. Lots of opportunities to over indulge.

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  16. It sounds like a very active Holiday Season with lots of fun things to do, so, I'd suggest do all the fun stuff until after the New Year, then make a resolution to wade thru the rest. *winks* Princess T made a Gingerbread House again, it's a Tradition of hers to do it and she seems to enjoy it and is old enuf now I don't have to get involved involuntarily. *smiles*

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    1. I miss the praise my gingerbread houses got but not the work or having the candy around. We had some cute entries this year. And the funny thing is the guy I tried 1st and 2nd places with before also didn't do one this year either.

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  17. I laughed immediately when I read "Diet and Exercise Mountain" - such an apt description! And you said "my clothes are getting uncomfortably tight and I refuse to buy a bigger size" - same here. Certainly for health I should lose weight - but even more motivational for me is the stubbornness to want to REFUSE to buy the next size of clothes!

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    1. That's been my problem since the '90s and my wardrobe is rather tacky because of it. I wish getting healthier would motivate me but doesn't. Maybe we'll meet each other at the top of the mountain this year. You never know.

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