Welcome to the Misadventures of Widowhood blog!

Welcome to my World---Woman, widow, senior citizen seeking to live out my days with a sense of whimsy as I search for inner peace and friendships. Jeez, that sounds like a profile on a dating app and I have zero interest in them, having lost my soul mate of 42 years. Life was good until it wasn't when my husband had a massive stroke and I spent the next 12 1/2 years as his caregiver. This blog has documented the pain and heartache of loss, my dark humor, my sweetest memories and, yes, even my pity parties and finally, moving past it all. And now I’m ready for a new start, in a new location---a continuum care campus in West Michigan, U.S.A. Some people say I have a quirky sense of humor that shows up from time to time in this blog. Others say I make some keen observations about life and growing older. Stick around, read a while. I'm sure we'll have things in common. Your comments are welcome and encouraged. Jean

Wednesday, May 22, 2024

From Barbie-Pink Gloves to the Proud Boys and The Cult

Sitting at my computer I was racking my brain for a topic to write about when down the road came an 18-wheeler flatbed with six U-Boxes and a Donkey on top. The giant U-Haul rig parked directly across from my windows. And before I get any farther along I should explain to anyone who might be confused that the Donkey was the four wheeler kind, not the four legged kind. In other words a Donkey brand forklift was attached to the back of the rig extending the normal 72 feet length of an 18-wheeler out another 5-6 feet.

I've see moving vans and trucks of all sizes and descriptions parked across from my windows. It's one of the few downsides of having a main floor apartment near a building's entry door. But like many other things this can be a two-sided coin. It's an advantage to, say, a gossipy-type person who loves to see other people's possessions paraded by her windows or it could be a disadvantage to a person who likes the tranquil view of the woods on the other side of the road and green space that, on occasions, gets blocked by a wall of metal and rubber. 

I normally don't care what is loaded or unloaded outside my windows unless it's a person into an ambulance. But the driver of this particular rig caught and held my attention. She was a petite thing with a bouncing blonde ponytail and as she jumped down from the driver's seat and walked back to the Donkey she pulled on a pair of Barbie Pink work gloves that made me smile from ear to ear. And in no time at all she had that Donkey down on the ground and whipped it around to unload one of the U-Boxes. I held my breath thinking if she didn't turn her load just right she'd end up backing into my windows but my fear was short-lived. She was good---no, she was great at her job. She handled herself with the confidence of a tattooed, biker-bar bouncer and she parked that U-Box in the designated space with the ease and precision of a Victorian era maid setting a table for high tea. And like the Amazon drivers do after delivering a package to our mail room, she took a photo of her delivered U-Box, then she drove the Donkey back to its hookup brackets and straps and she was back on the road in less than six minutes from when she arrived.

It hit me that what I was seeing was the results of the second wave of the Feminism Movement that I was a part of back in '60s and '70s. We have equal opportunities for women in the labor force now that we didn't have back then, but not without getting some societal stretchmarks from people like The Proud Boys who feel they are being left behind or out-shined by women. That's an over simplification, of course, because the Proud Boys don't just hate women. They also hate transgenders, Muslims, immigrants and they are hardcore White Supremacists. Wouldn't it be nice if they died out for lack of breeding opportunities. I can't imagine a woman as capable and confident as my Barbie U-Haul Driver being attracted to a guy who spends his weekends playing soldier in the woods and planning for an Armageddon.

Still, social anthropologists who study hate groups like this say the danger is thinking that all hardcore racists are contained in these pocket groups that can be tracked. I, for one, have a hard time taking them seriously because their very name says they are proud that they haven't matured into fully functioning men---men who take responsibility for their own life choices instead of blaming go-getters like Ms Barbie Pink Gloves and so-called 'woke' people and others who don't look like them. In the meantime we forget that the Proud Boys have aunts, uncles, parents, grandparents and other family members who have the same agenda of hate, but they keep a low profile. They are quietly running for offices on school boards, in townships and counties all over the country. They might not wear labels like the Proud Boys or even think of themselves as racists, but they are also in this culture war, while those of us on the other side are blissfully and willfully ignoring them as if they are as insignificant as a fly bussing around a family picnic table.

According to a website that tracks the Proud Boys we should be afraid of them and their extended orbit if Trump gets re-elected. Even though the January Sixth Insurrection decentralized the group when many of their leaders ended up with long prison terms, Trump is now promising to pardon them all if he's re-elected. In other words he's blowing his dog whistle again for them to stand back and stand by. 

Because the Proud Boys are equal opportunists when it comes to hating others, their members belong to a wide variety of other, more targeted hate groups as well and that's one of the main factors that helped coordinate activities that resulted in our first Insurrection at the Capital. I say "first" because it will happen again if Trump doesn't win our next election. Maybe the mobs won't be as big or maybe they're bring bigger weapons or both. But hopefully, the powers that be will be ready this time. 

<Rant On> Those of us who value democracy cannot stay complacent. We cannot stay silent! We must do what we can, while we still can, to get people to tune into what is at stake with the coming election. All the gains we've made in Equal Opportunities for women and people of color in the last 50 years will be undermined if the Democrats lose. Not to mention reproductive freedom is at stake. All the strides we've made towards cleaning up the planet will be turned back, and Trump is promising to throw out the Affordable Health Care Act along with getting rid of the regulatory agencies that protect our water, food chain and medical supplies. His plans to round up immigrants is literally right out of the 1930's Nazi handbook.

Biden may have made mistakes but he's a moral man of honor who we can trust to surround himself with good people should he die in office. Where Trump is a man with no moral compass who the first time around surrounded himself with people who are now either sitting in prison or who have come out against ever letting Trump near the Oval Office again. The polls all say that these two men are running neck to neck and that means too many people are turning a blind eye to the dangers of another Trump term. So those of us who aren't under the spell of the Trump Cult need to step up to the plate and help them see we're on the Crazy Train headed toward Fascism. We do that by speaking up whenever we are given the opportunity. We can, we must be willing to have some uncomfortable conversations with the goal of helping our Democracy to survive. The world does not need another immoral dictator. <Rant Off> 

Until Next Wednesday.  ©

37 comments:

  1. BRAVO!!!!!! Well, let me share a little story. I'm sorry to say we have plenty of men in my area who are stockpiling arms for the Armageddon. Fortunately they aren't very smart. There was a fire on a country road on Sunday. A man of the advanced age of late 60's had built a house a few years ago when he got divorced on some acreage. (first rule of rural house building, put the pond in first). No pond. Put up a huge pole barn building for his toys. And stockpiled lots of guns and ammunition. He was so talented he even had gunpowder stored for the bullets he was making for himself. Well, somehow the house or building caught fire. He wasn't home and a passerby called it in. It was fully engulfed very quickly and everything including his motorcycle and sports car and four wheelers burned flat to the ground. The gunpowder helped, but what hindered was the explosions of the bullets and firearms that kept fire fighters back and out of danger. That and the fact they had to drive a distance to fill the tankers from a community water tower a few miles away.
    As dumb as this sounds it is the second one in two years where the house had so many guns and bullets that the firemen had to step back and let it burn to the ground for safety reasons. Luckily both fires had no loss of human life or injuries so I can just stick out my tongue and say nah, nah, nah.

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    1. Hard to feel sorry for people like that. I'm sure insurance wouldn't cover fires with an illegal stock piles of gun powder and guns.

      Happened around here once too. The guy was also a tax evader and ended up losing a 400 acre farm that had been in his family for three generations. He had the money to pay taxes his taxes but he refused on principle and tens years of that, they came after him. Had an armed standoff that lasted a month before the fire. He ended up in prison and the farm getting sold to pay off his taxes.

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  2. I'm impressed by that driver! I'm a lousy driver and stick to driving a couple of blocks to the grocery store. My contribution to the world. šŸ˜Š

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  3. PS Cheerful Monk/lousy driver

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    1. I used to drive pick up trucks and our RV but I did not like driving the RV at all. This girl was totally at easy and skillful.

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  4. I smiled when I read about your little blonde sporting the pink John Deere gloves while handling big equipment. Even though our world is far from perfect, I so appreciate how far we've come...at least most women can pursue professions of their choosing. Remember that song, "I can bring home the bacon, fry it up in the pan...cause I'm a woman." We were all singing along about 40 (maybe more) years ago. Here we are, wondering what life will look like in our near future.



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    1. I do remember that song. Fondly. This Pink Gloved cutie was a great reminder that we have come a long way even though in recent years our progress as women is under attack.

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  5. We have a couple of trucking companies here that are owned and operated by women. One of them has pink semis. I always smile and feel proud when I see them on the road.

    You know that I share your sentiments when it comes to Politics. And wasn't the outcome of the Georgia vote for Fani Willis wonderful?

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    1. Yes, I love the way Georgia is progressing. The guy Fani had the affair with is being interviewed tonight on either CNN or MSNBC.

      I would smile at pink semis too!

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  6. Well ranted. I did smile at your line about the Proud Boys: "Wouldn't it be nice if they died out for lack of breeding opportunities." The problem is, as you went on to elaborate, they're the tip of the iceberg. Hate can be a family value, quietly simmering behind smiling faces that encourage their Proud Boys to act out. And to procreate with the *right* people.

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    1. And those 'right people' would be the M.T. Greens of the world. Very scary!

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  7. I agree with your rant and hope Biden wins in November. Thanks for speaking up!

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    1. It's not easy but it's now or never in my opinion when we must do it.

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  8. Rant on, Jean! Rant on! As a very concerned northern neighbour, I can’t believe that the Orange Turd has ANY followers let alone enough for people to worry he could get into office again. I guess this explains Hitler et al….people never learn!!!

    Deb

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    1. His whole circle of people who would be serving in his cabinet and the Oval Office, should he get re-elected, has ties back to Nazism and White Power groups. The dog whistles his campaign puts out there are more like fog horns this time around. That newspaper/campaign ad with the Nazi language in it was was no accident.

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  9. I enjoyed Miss Merry’s comment as much as your post! No, those trumpers are not the sharpest knives in the drawer! I have noticed, however, that they are not showing up in droves at the trial and the orange genius is p*ssed. The most enthusiastic are either in jail or maybe a lightbulb went off when they saw what could happen to those poor suckers.
    Having been an observant high school teacher, I categorize trumpers with the poor low self esteem saps who’d quiver every day in the wake of bullies. Then, one magical day, they’re tapped on the shoulder and invited to be a friend of the bully. The only cost is to sell your soul. Assume the same hate, target the vulnerable, adopt the same despicable behavior, constantly play to “an audience of one,” and be naive enough to assume protection from your hero in exchange for your steadfast loyalty. I’m not surprised these “low IQ individuals” exist, but the sheer number of them boggles my mind. I guess it’s because I associate with quality people who’d die of shame to be named as racist, not the growing number of them proudly identifying as such over the past 8 years.

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    1. Thanks for sharing your observations. They make a lot of sense. Let's hope the low number of supporters outside the trial is speaking volumes.

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  10. Thanks for ranting. There are SO MANY Trump lovers I'm too shy to say anything. How could anyone in their right mind vote for someone with so many felonies???? It's ridiculous.

    Pink gloved Barbie is an awesome story. I can barely back my little car up!

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    1. We all have to get over that shyness and soon!

      I put a link in my side bar to you new blog, later tonight when I have more time. Welcome back! You should have lots to write about.

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  11. Trump is a real danger and people have been bullied by him for years. The ignorance is this country is staggering. Mary

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  12. love your post you are absolutely right, how can one in their right mind vote for trump, who is not only characterless, bully &racist guy. Even though I don't like Biden's some of the policies of forgiving loans & some other policies just to win, I would still not vote for Trump for what he did on Jan 6

    Asha

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    1. If it makes you feel any better the only students who qualify are students that have paid their monthly payments for 10 years and what is being forgiven are the priority, high interest rates. Lots of corporations and big businesses have gottne their interest forgiven.

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  13. Many women are as capable of men but not all and there are some men who are useless as tits on a bull, just saying. Many young men today are not as capable as their fathers or grandfathers were. Then there are men like Trump dropped on his head at birth and chocked on food as a toddler causing brain damage that he is unaware of

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  14. I second your rant -- and while I suspect you're speaking to the converted here, it's so important to be reinforced at every possible time. I am baffled why anyone would vote for him -- and yet it's far too close for comfort. Well said, Jean.

    Just today my friend Kate and I were at the gas station and I asked her, "Could you imagine your mother pumping her own gas?" and the answer was no (as was mine.) Things have changed -- and for the better.

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    1. The equalizing of changes in men and woman roles over the decades has made it possible for men to be better fathers and husbands. Couples can divide labor up in a marriage by who is better suited for cooking, child care, home maintenance and bringing home the bacon.

      There was a Trump supporter who spoke up in the comments in the last post. She/he inspired this post when she/he said Trump was not a racist. I couldn't get that out of my head how anyone could say that.

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    2. Ignorance. Just ignorance.

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  15. Thanks for the picture of the pink work gloves--I think I'll get those for my sister for her birthday. I continue to be shocked that the polls are so close for Trump, but my dad always maintained that most people are not very bright. After my stroke, I can't do the street activism anymore, these days I'm a keyboard warrior, but I'm appalled by the mainstream media, and how they pander to Trump. I have to really search out the people who are reporting what's really going on and read what they think, to balance things out.

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    1. I don't see as much pandering this time as with the last election. Still, finding reliable sources is hard!

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  16. All of our drivers but 1 UPS is a female. The one UPS is damn cute, I hope a female doesn't replace him for my sake. :-)

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    1. I know what you mean. We have a couple of those around here too that are good eye candy.

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  17. Bravo Jean, good Rant, Silence and Ambivalence is complicity IMO to enable Evil to prevail. When good people say or do nothing, what began as a Foothold soon becomes a Stronghold, and too late is just too late. The opposite of being Woke is Asleep... too many Americans are slumbering or enabling this most dangerous shift happening in our Nation.

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  18. I just want to shake a few people who think Trump was and still can be a good president!

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  19. I, too, have had those Wow! moments when I'm reminded just how much opportunities have expanded for women since we were young. Recently, my choral group did a concert of music from 1972 (including Helen Reddy's "I Am Woman") and I found myself trying to explain to younger singers what the world was like for women at that time.

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    1. It's important for us to keep telling our stories so we/younger women don't let the gains made backslide one piece at a time.

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