Welcome to the Misadventures of Widowhood blog!

Welcome to my World---Woman, widow, senior citizen seeking to live out my days with a sense of whimsy as I search for inner peace and friendships. Jeez, that sounds like a profile on a dating app and I have zero interest in them, having lost my soul mate of 42 years. Life was good until it wasn't when my husband had a massive stroke and I spent the next 12 1/2 years as his caregiver. This blog has documented the pain and heartache of loss, my dark humor, my sweetest memories and, yes, even my pity parties and finally, moving past it all. And now I’m ready for a new start, in a new location---a continuum care campus in West Michigan, U.S.A. Some people say I have a quirky sense of humor that shows up from time to time in this blog. Others say I make some keen observations about life and growing older. Stick around, read a while. I'm sure we'll have things in common. Your comments are welcome and encouraged. Jean

Sunday, January 29, 2012

Widowhood: Day One

Widowhood: Day one after the funeral. I made some calls today to notify people about Don’s passing. One was to the medical supply company that rented us his oxygen machine and the backup oxygen tanks to use during power outages that never happened. Who wants to look at those big, ugly monsters sitting there no longer doing their job? Anyway, the woman on the phone says, “And when was your husband’s expiration date?”

Expiration date? I thought, We're not boxes of cereal with expiration dates stamped on our bottoms! If that were true we could have planned our lives better, darn it!

That thought got me to laughing and visualizing poor Don's bare butt with the expiration date tattooed on one cheek. No doubt Ms. Medical Supply Lady thought I was entirely too happy, given the nature of my call. I wasn't happy, of course, but I'd already used up my daily crying quota by noon and it was 2:00 in the afternoon.

How long do you suppose it will take her before it dawns on her that there’s a difference between saying, “When did your husband expire?” and “What was his expiration date?” Then again, maybe I’m the one with a warped sense of humor. Maybe she says that same thing day after day and I’m the only one who laughed and found it even funnier when she got annoyed at me for finding dark humor in trying to arrange for a pick up of medical equipment.


  1. Way across the world, here in Australia, I have been inspired for years by your Don and by yourself. He lives on in my memory, even though I never met him.

    We all make an impact on this world, and through your blog you have extended even further the scope of Don's influence.

    I've marked this new blog address, and I'm looking forward to finding out what life is like for you in the future.

  2. Thank you so much for the kind words. Blogging is so therapeutic to do and it's a real bonus when you find out what you write has touched someone you've never met.

  3. Jean, I am another Jean who just happened onto your blog and was immediately drawn in. Although I'm not a widow (I've been single since I divorced in my early 30s), the gallows humor in this post really resonated for me. I expect to come back and read more and perhaps get to know you a bit through your writing. Thanks for sharing your story. -Jean

  4. Jean, One thing that loss brings out in some of us is dark humor. I try to nurse that humor as a coping tool. Thanks for the comment! I've checked out your blog and added you to the list of blogs I follow. I look forward to reading your journey into retirement.

    the other Jean

  5. I got those big, noisy oxygen concentrators--the Bi-Pap and the nebulizer back to the medical supply company BEFORE the funeral.

  6. jan, 29th 2012 was the day my husband died. or expired.

    hugs, bee

    1. Wow, our husbands did die close to each other...just eight days apart. Welcome to the club few of us want to belong to.


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