Today I got one of those chain emails after spending the
morning on the Wild West of political sites where you can debate with not only Democrats,
Republicans, Libertarians and Tea Party people but also with KKK members,
secessionists, hard-core NRA members, conspiracy theorists and survivalists
claiming to be living off the grid. And did I mention crazy people? It truly is
a site of fast-moving and diverse opinions filled with nasty name calling and
delusional thought. But I consider my time spent there akin to brain exercises
with a side order of research and debate practice thrown in. For a long time after
Don died I didn’t have the stomach for the place but the mass murders in California
this past Holiday weekend drew me back in big time. The disgusting lack of
empathy for one of the victim’s father, who showed the world his raw grief on
the media, was mind boggling and I couldn’t leave those forum threads alone.
But the world---at least mine---has a way of finding balance
when it’s needed the most thus enters the chain email I got this afternoon. It’s
titled The Law of the Garbage Truck. I have since learned there is a book by that same name written by David J.
Pollay and after reading the reviews, it's obvious the book gave birth to the chain email. Whether David wrote the original email, or someone else, the story in it is his. The book has been translated into 50 languages so I have no doubt this email has probably been around the world a few time. In case you didn't get a copy, here it is:
“One day I hopped in a taxi and we took off for the airport.
We were driving in the right lane when suddenly a black car jumped out of a
parking space right in front of us. My taxi driver slammed on his brakes,
skidded, and missed the other car by just inches! The driver of the other car whipped
his head around and started yelling at us. My taxi driver just smiled and waved
at the guy. And I mean, he was really friendly. So I asked, 'Why did you just
do that? This guy almost ruined your car and sent us to the hospital!' This is
when my taxi driver taught me what I now call, 'The Law of the Garbage Truck.'
"He explained that many people are like garbage trucks. They
run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of
disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they need a place to dump it and sometimes
they'll dump it on you. Don't take it personally. Just smile, wave, wish them
well, and move on. Don't take their garbage and spread it to other people at
work, at home, or on the streets. The bottom line is that successful people do
not let garbage trucks take over their day. Life's too short to wake up in the
morning with regrets. So ....love the people who treat you right. Pray for the
ones who don't. Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you
take it.”
I love that story, maybe because it reminds me of my one of
my father’s philosophical thoughts on how to live a happy life. Maybe I like
the story because it will help remind me not to take it personal when I’m at the Wild
West of websites and I’m being called vile names because I dare have empathy
for a grieving father. Not that I do take it personal 90% of the time. But that 10% of
the time when I do start getting too invested in a debate thread, I’m going
to remember the Law of the Garbage Truck.
And if that isn’t enough to keep me in check when I start feeling like I am starting to take it personal I will recite a great line I learned today over
at Bella Rum’s blog: “Is this the hill I want to die on?” What could be a more appropriate
question to ask myself when it might be time to retreat from the Wild West and
come play with my friends in the wonderful world of widow and old people bloggers? Some wars of words can't be won and sometimes it's better to live to fight another day. ©
I have blocked a couple FB friends because of their Garbage Truck load. I liked Bella's friends saying too. Or--"Will this matter in five years?" "Is this a matter of life or death?" I could not go to your political site--I would just end up being angry or sad or wonder why some people are such idiots. Good post here, Jean!!!
ReplyDeleteI haven't blocked anyone on Facebook but I have my setting set so I don't have the "garbage dumpers" in my daily feed.
DeleteThanks Judy! You have to be in the right mood, that's for sure to fight at that political site. There are other political sites where the management doesn't allow the fringe group people to get away with so much nastiness but in some ways I like the unfilled version. It's easier to pick out the idiots and try to get them to see the other side of the coin.
Why would anyone be miffed because the father of one of the victims was so ravaged with grief? What were their reasons?
ReplyDeleteThe NRA hard-liners see him as "the enemy" because the father mentioned Sandy Hook and asked why hasn't our law makers done anything about gun control. So they attack this father and don't seem to recognize raw grief when they see it. Some think it's all act, other don't care if he's grieving. The debates can go on for days and days and get thousands of views.
DeleteGood Grief!! The guy on campus had guns legally. I am for stricter gun laws at gun shows and that sort of thing, but, in the long run,, when you have a nut case on the loose, they will figure out someway to harm people, be it a bomb, a machete or their car. What we really need to concentrate on is getting funding for mental hospitals to be opened back up and for parents to get the help they need for their troubled children. The whole world makes me very sad!
DeleteI agree but I also think we have to hit the problem from all angles, all at once. It's such a complicated issue that it does make you sad because what ever is or can be done is going to take time and a whole generation of kids, in the meantime, are going to grow up in fear while the adult argue over solutions.
DeleteFirst time I've read the Law of the Garbage Truck. >>>Warning <<< I'm emptying my garbage truck today, this minute -
ReplyDeleteIt's a neat story, isn't it.
DeleteI LOVE this story! Hopefully I'll remember it often when someone just needs to dump. We never really know what's going on behind the scenes.
ReplyDeleteWith all the nut balls out there in society I think the Law of the Garbage Truck is a good way to treat strangers who unreasonably dump on you.
DeleteHi, Jean. I stopped by early this morning but I was interrupted before I could finish.
ReplyDeleteI love the Garbage Truck philosophy. People dump their stuff on us and move on, and sometimes we carry it all day. Not taking it personally is the way to go.
Virginia is one of the worst states regarding gun sales. You can't swing a cat around here without hitting someone who owns guns. You can buy most anything you want at gun shows. I don't think that will change anytime soon. It's frustrating. I can't believe people can find the nerve to criticize a grieving father.
Believe it, they are still ragging on Richard Martinez although I finally dropped out of the threads. It's truly disgusting the names the gun nuts call that grieving father.
ReplyDeleteWe saw that interview too. It was heart breaking to see the father grieving for his son and other people taking "pot shots" at him. It seems like empathy and understanding how people may react to something horrible have totally gone out the window.
ReplyDeleteBut we love the Garbage Truck philosophy. It definitely describes those chain email messages to a T. And Mama has a friend that constantly bombards my email with useless messages.
Love -
Hershey and Kaci
Empathy does seem to be getting lost in this day and age. Very sad!
DeleteWe haven't seen the end of Mr.Martinez. I guess he was evolved in the gun control debate before his son was killed and he is going to be a force to recon with.in the future, I think.