The point I'm trying to make is that I'm rarely offended by what an author thinks a reader needs to know to carry a plot forward but when an author crosses over to write gratuitous sex scenes it's pretty easy for me to spot and that can get pretty boring. I quit reading Susan Stoker's military romances, for example, because she included S&M in two books and I don't care how much she tried to justify her characters liking the Fifty Shades of Grey antics in the bedroom, I don't believe they belong in any book marketed as 'Romance.' It's not mentally healthy nor good for women (or men) to be sold a bill of goods that whatever happens between two consenting adults is just fine and dandy. It's not. Don't even try to tell me about safe words and how pain and pleasure are supposedly only a fine line apart. I'm never going to buy it.
Our book club here on the continuum care campus is reading a coming-of-age book that no one seems to be enjoying and no one is owning up to having picked it for our reading list. It was the conversation at our Monday dinner table and I was shocked to learn that two women in the club were offended by the description of the sexual scenes. One woman quit reading Maame after the first one (Chapter 5) where the protagonist lost her virginity and another lady was considering doing the same after the second one (chapter 7). I was totally confused because I couldn't recall either scene and I when I got home, I searched the book and I found out that neither scene was more than a page of description and rather bland description at that. What did that say about me that I read them and they didn't even register, much less register as something that could easily offend anyone. I was even more confused by the third and final sexual encounter which was a four on a scale of ten for hotness. I was braced for a down and dirty, page after page affair based on the negative comments I'd heard. Didn't happen. But I was happy that the main character finally got some pleasure out of these consensual encounters. All in all it was forgettable book.
Our December/January book club selection (discussed in February) was The Covenant of Water by Abraham Verghese. It was over 700 pages long which is why we allowed two months instead of one to read it. It's a family saga style book that covers three generations and I've never liked that kind of book. Every day for two months I spent an hour in India and at first I was enjoying the expert writing and colorful descriptions of a part of the world and a culture I knew little about. But about three-forths of the way through the novel it felt like I was back in the work force with a quota to make every day. I ended up quitting the book about 125 pages short of finishing. I just didn’t care anymore. The others in book club told me I missed the best part.
We also read The Book of Lost Names by Kritin Harmel which was based on a true story about a young woman who used her art talents to forge documents for Jewish children who were being smuggled out of harm's way during WWII. I loved that book. I also loved The Beekeeper of Aleppo by Christry Lefteri which was about another part of the world I knew little about---the Syrian War, the refugee camps the displaced population lived in and what it took to immigrate to a safer part of the world. In both of theses books the authors were able to make you care about their fictionalized characters. When reading stories based on real events I'm often amazed at what the human spirit can endure and come out the other side with most of their marbles still intact.
Other book Club sections: An Immense World by Ed Yong is a book that I'm sure I wrote about already and How the Word is Passed: A Reckoning with the History of Slavery Across America by Clint Smith which I'm sure I haven't written about. All I have to say about the latter book is that it's always interesting in book club when we read something that involved black history or a black point of view that our resident Trump fan feels obligated to defend racism. Gotta give her credit for standing up for her beliefs no matter how out of touch with reality and common sense they are.
Other than book club selections I've read three popcorn romances by Pippa Grant---books you read in a hurry and quickly forget. But based on the reaction the ladies in my book club had toward the sex scenes in Maame I'd never share this author's books around here. Reading Pippa Grant's descriptions would put a few ladies into cardiac arrest. ©
Until next Wednesday.
Our book group has had some dire books too, I usually try to read them, but give up if after 50 pages I am not enjoying it.. life too short to read books I don't like.. is my mantra!
ReplyDeleteI usually try my best to read an entire book but I don't feel guilty if I don't make it. I love our book club discussions, though. You learn a lot about each other in them.
DeleteSometimes I wonder about women like that. Methinks they doth protest too much, you know?
ReplyDeleteI wonder about that large party of society in general that can accept violence in movies and books easier than consensual sex. Where I live I'm pretty sure it's the influence of the church and giving into temptation that feeds into it.
DeleteYes...you can bet it's the local church influence. Shocked! Shocked, I tell you. LOL.
DeleteI think I've given up on book club. It's not that I don't want to read new books, but I have (and I counted a few days ago) 78 books sitting in front of me that I want to read before I die. And I know that pile will get bigger (probably in a couple of weeks when I do beloated Christmas with my book friend!) I just don't have time to read the way I'd like. I never get it why people get totally bent out of shape on certain scenes. If they offend you, skip over them. Most of the time, not that important. Or not "your book." Move on!
ReplyDeleteHaving read your blog posts where you review the books you've read I can see why you don't like book clubs. You have a genre and part of the world you gravitate towards. It's your happy place. Nothing wrong with that but the whole point of a book club---at least the ones I've been in---is to get us out of your reading comfort zones. For me it works.
DeleteMy goodness to the gracious it sounds like your bookclub has a few prudes. I suppose they all do. I'm with you about family saga style books that covers three generations. When I was a teenager I found them heartwarming but now I find them beleaguered. Don't need to know how family members evolve and are in dysfunctional relationships and seem to put up with each other despite knowing better. I'm more cynical now.
ReplyDeleteI can't help it, I find prudish old women amusing as all get out. We have a guy here who is too and he's even more fun to watch when someone says something that offends his tender sensibilities.
DeleteI'm glad you mentioned not liking family sagas either. I was the odd man out in book club on that opinion.
The most interesting thing about your post is the way it highlights my own preferences. Like fantasy and sci-fi, I have no taste for romances and such. To each her own and all that. I suppose that's part of the reason book clubs don't appeal. I have a stack of books waiting to be read that I suspect never would land on a group's list. Of course, time's an issue as well. When I have 'spare' time I'm pretty careful about how I use it.
ReplyDeleteWe get our books from the libraries Book Club in a Bag Program so it's a curated list we pick from---books that are best sellers and award winning stuff. I like that we don't have to buy books outside our comfort zone to try them.
DeleteI can see why you think I prefer romance books, given what I wrote above. But just because I default back to what got me into reading in the first place---when I'm looking for a diversion from every day life--- doesn't mean romance is still my favorite genre like it was in my forties when I was first learning to love reading. I'm just as likely to pick up a dystopia book or bibliography of an artist or politician. Because of my dyslexia I was a poor reader who struggled with books all through school, didn't enjoy them at all until I followed my mom into the romance genre. Add to the mix I made my living for twenty years off from wedding flowers when I collected stories from brides and grooms about how they met, romance has been a default part of my life.
Currently reading The Dictionary of Lost Words by Pip Williams, a fictional story of the writing of the Oxford dictionary & the coming-of-age of Esme in the early 1900s. The composition of the dictionary was like history; it depends who writes it & Esme discovered words in common use by women & classes that didn't make the dictionary. A good read. Would also recommend The Five Invitations: What Death Can Teach Us About Living Fully by Frank Ostaseski, a hospice worker's reflections on his work with the dying. Also finished a book last month by J K Rowling - The Casual Vacancy, revealing the family & community dynamics in an English community when a local politician dies suddenly. What appeals to someone is so subjective.
ReplyDeleteThe Dictionary of Lost Words is a book our club picked to read later this year. It sounds fascinating. The Five Invitations I read in my long-ago book club and thanks for the reminder. It would be a good one to recommend here. I've read one of J K Rowing Harry Potter books but didn't know she wrote for adults. Apparently the Casual Vacancy is her first. She's got such a creative mind, I can see her doing well outside of writing fantasy.
DeleteI recently picked up some 1970 era Janet Daileys at a book sale for fun. I used to read them when my kids were babies because they had no plot and you could set them down and lose what page you were on. And it didn't matter. I started two of them and they were so awful. A man in his 30's, an innocent 19 year old - he is constantly threatening to "put her over his knee" for her immature behavior. I tore them into pieces so no one else would have to read them.
ReplyDeleteI just finished Let Us Descend by Jesmyn Ward. It was one of the most amazing books I have read in a while. She is a two time national book award winner and it was an Oprah Book Club selection in 2023. It's a novel, the story of a young woman slave who is sold from a plantation and marched to the slave markets of New Orleans. It is harrowing and heart wrenching with some hope and redemption, and written so beautifully. I am a fast reader. For this book I would read 3 pages at a time, one page to remember how I left it, and two new pages, one word at a time to savor the meaning. One of the reviews on the back call it prose. I would recommend it to any book club.
Romances have come a long way since Janet Dailey was popular. Good for you for destroying those books. So many young girls read romances that I feel romance authors have a responsibility to not give girls/women the impression that it's okay to be treated in an abusive way by someone who supposedly loves them.
DeleteLet Us Descend sounds like my kind of book. I just added to my wish list at Amazon. Thanks for the recommendation. I love books where the author can make the words come off the pages like a song. Thanks.
I have to agree with the ones who told you you gave up on The Covenant of Water too soon, Jean. A book your club might enjoy (the non-Republicans, that is) is James by Percival Everett - a retelling of Huckleberry Finn from the perspective of Jim, the enslaved man. If it is not already on your schedule, you might want to consider it.
ReplyDeleteDeb
I still have the' Covenant of Water' on my Kindle so maybe I will try it again.
DeleteWhat an interesting idea for a book 'James' sounds like. I'll add to my list of things to recommend. Thanks! We don't really recommend so much as we each get to pick one or two books for the following year based on how many show up at the meeting where we reserve them off of the Book Club in a Bag menu.
I've been reading, or I should say listening to, Historical Fiction. I'm still hungup on Medieval Books (and movies). I'm not sure where this came from, maybe Game of Thrones or the Viking tv series. The bad thing about it is that nobody I know watches them so there is nobody to discuss with.
ReplyDeleteI used to read a lot of historicals and I loved Medievals too. Jude Deveraux, Francine Rivers, Julie Garwood comes to mind but I'm not sure if they all wrote Medivals. 'A Knight in Shining' is a time travel that goes between medieval times and modern. I've listened to that one at least six times. I set it on a timer under my pillow to help me sleep. I credit that book with turning me time travel books and movies.
DeleteI love historical romance books. Really? Any romantic story. Even with a little humor. Thanks for sharing your secret!
ReplyDeleteOkay, I'm confused. What secret did I share? I'm pretty sure I've written about reading romances a couple of times and I know you've been following my blog since almost the beginning.
DeleteI read a variety of books and they must grab me in the first few chapters if I am going to finish them. To be fair that is not the best idea as sometimes it takes a while to get to the meat of the story. As far as romance books goes I can move past the detailed sex description as have never thought they needed to go into such detail. I mostly read for pleasure but occasionally I read books that go along with a study I am doing. At times I have more than one book that I am reading, especially if one pertains to a class I am doing as I need something lighter after reading in the study book. We are blessed to have a lovely library in our small town that offers lots of classes and learning experiences that are well attended. JJ
ReplyDeleteI agree with you about some romance books going into more detail than they need to. It actually gets boring and I've been know to skim past those scenes. I admire you being able to have two books going at a time. If I've ever been able to do that I don't remember. We do have a good library system in Michigan don't we---assuming you are who I think you are.
DeleteI also loved The Beekeeper of Aleppo; it's such a beautiful novel and gives us an inside look at the refugee experience.
ReplyDeleteThe book put a human face on refugees in a way I haven't read before. I would read it again.
DeleteI wonder what the people in your book club think of Trump.
ReplyDeleteI know the answer to that...of the twelve we have two Trump supporters and a third that dropped out because there are mostly liberals in the group and she didn't like our list of books. I'm guessing liberals read a wider range of topics than conservatives. One of the women who quit reading the book because of the sex scene is a 45/47 fan.
DeleteThat's what I figured, which is funny considering his background.
DeleteHi, Jean, been reading you for a while but first time commenting. I really enjoy your blog and your trenchant, yet kind (umm maybe not right word. Humane? Wry?) observations about life. I like your book reviews - alot - and I thoroughly agree with your assessment of the Covenant of Water. I think the editor could have cut AT LEAST 125 pages off - and you are being very generous - I would have gone with 200 pages gone, but I am a journalist and used to writing short and to the point. On the other hand, Verghese's first book "Cutting for Stone," has been more skilfully edited and his lyrical writing is on full display. I would highly recommend. I love that you read romances, I just read an Emily Giffin book, which looked like Chick Lit on the library shelf and which I swore I would never read for various snobbish reasons, and THOROUGHLY ENJOYED IT. Also, this book https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/206305528-lessons-in-chemistry?ref=nav_sb_ss_1_4 is lovely, and I think you might like it. And I hope I am not overstepping by saying that, but I know you will let me know if I am, and I love that about you. Please, please keep writing. I love to read your stuff and you encourage me to resurrect my moribund blog. I am 70 and you make me hope I still matter dammit!
ReplyDeleteThank you for reading and commenting! I you do resurrect your blog makes sure to let me know and I'll list it in my side bar.
DeleteMy book club read 'Lessons in Chemistry' and we all enjoyed it. I have not heard of Emily Griffin but I just added her to my list of authors to check out. I struggle find a topic to write about when I wrote this one and it turned out to have a bonus of adding to my list of books and authors to explore.
I mostly read mystery books. I really don't care for romance novels at all. I do like historical fiction and will read some non-fiction- I liked reading "The Woman They Could Not Silence" - a book by Kate Moore that tells the true story of Elizabeth Packard, a woman who was wrongfully committed to an insane asylum by her husband in the 1860s. Those stories of people overcoming hardships are inspiring.
ReplyDeleteI think I read that book or at least one with the same theme. Married men back in those days had lots of power over their wives and could get their wives committed very easily.
DeleteOMG, the Puritans in the Club, I'd be inclined not to even be thinking about the Books Sexual encounters and Imagining what a frigid uptight Sex Life those Book Club Ladies must have had?! *LMAOROTF* I probably could never belong to a Book Club becoz I don't possess the Attention Span to get thru a Book that has to be Read and doesn't just have great Images. *Winks* Even the good Books, I've rarely ended up finishing, I'll just have to wait for the Movie to come out. *Smiles* I think it's great you have a Book Club tho' and can get different perspectives on the same Book everyone Reads and might feel differently about. The MAGA Racist feeling the Need to defend Racism, and injustices to Human Beings based on something as superficial as appearance or differences, well, that has to be an Interesting Eyebrow Raising Monologue??? Does anyone say anything to her? I'm guessing probably not... since, her kind rarely feel Shame or Change for the better... so it's rather pointless. And it can be surprising how biased some folks can be and yet in other ways seem perfectly decent, such a dichotomy.
ReplyDeleteIt's that dichotomy that keeps us all civil to one another plus the fact that we live so close together that picking a fight with one another would harm the entire community too much. There are a few of us in book club who might say a sentence or two to push back, but that's as far as we go. But behind her back we agree it is pointless.
DeleteYes, Diplomacy and keeping Harmony is preferable in any Community if it can be Managed. We kept to ourselves a lot in the previous Community due to having nothing in common with them and really not intending to be a part of who they just were. In a Retirement Community I do suspect that most Residents just want a Peace to their Days, to just exist without the Drama or Headaches that are avoidable and not necessary. And, it can dispel being Lonesome that can afflict so many Seniors in the Isolation that happens when you're not a part of a Community you can Connect to at some level.
DeleteYup, you get it.
DeleteJanet Dailey! I couldn't remember the name of the author I saw my Dad reading several times. I had NO idea she was a romance writer, or that my Dad was a fan. Just another conversation I wish I'd had with him. Sigh.
ReplyDeleteBack in his day I'm guessing it was rare for guys to get into reading romance genre books. Now it's not at all.
DeleteI have never been interested in mushy romance novels or those where sex plays a major role. I just couldn't get into the stories
ReplyDeleteThere is something out there for everyone.
DeleteThe Covenant of Water was disappointing to me. His first book, Cutting for Stone, is one of my all time favorites. But, as someone mentioned in an earlier comment, this one really needed editing. Way too long and could have told the same story in way fewer pages. But I did slog through to the end.
ReplyDeleteAs for the whole S&M/Fifty Shades genre, I agree with you re: anyone being hurt, safe word or not. When blogging was in its very early days, my DD was blogging and became online friends with a young woman who got involved with a threesome (a married couple). It was clear by her stories and a few photos that she was being beaten and had convinced herself it was erotic. After she broke free from that mess, she met someone online out West and was moving out to join another couple. After a bit, she just disappeared and wasn't heard from again. Whenever I hear of violence sold as sex, I think of her. I hope she is alive, but some days I wonder.
I quit my book club for some of these very reasons.i suggested a book. The women all shook their heads when the found the topic was a true story about a mother who told her son he was the color of water. When he was taunted fir not being black or white. I enjoyed the book. A quick read. I saw the author on Oprah. I remember he said if he knew this little book would become so successful, he'd have done a better job writing it.Now was this great literature. No. But I found the story interesting and we were looking for a quick read before everyone was beginning their summer vacation. But these women went ballistic on the topic and the fact that this wasn't what the defined as good literature. Oh well, I liked the book regardless of what they thought!
ReplyDeleteI find it hard to believe that any book club would turn down a book that had bee featured on an Oprah show. The books she features are books that have themes that can spur great discussions. Pretty snobby of them. Their loss.
DeleteI'm not a fiction reader but I spent 2023 reading ALA's list of 50 banned books. I learned a lot and was not offended by anything I read. I'm currently reading Griffin Dunne's memoir, The Friday Afternoon Club (Dominick's son) a terrific book you would probably enjoy but would likely offend your easily offended club members. ;-)
ReplyDeleteI admire you for reading books from the banned books list. I've read a few just to support the authors. I just read a review of The Friday Afternoon Club. Looks really interesting, thanks for the recommendation.
DeleteMaame was so much more then sex scenes and as you said I don't even remember them.
ReplyDeleteWe had our discussion of Maame yesterday and it was a better discussion than any of thought it would be---the guided questions helped. Of the 12 of us, two didn't finish it and one like the book. the rest of of neither loved it or hated it.
DeleteI usually don't comment when I'm this late, but you've hit on my favorite topic. I came to romance books very late in life. I've always been a reader, lots of mysteries and science fiction, then kids books (aloud) when I had small children, then a lot of nonfiction, then I had the stroke. I couldn't cope with nonfiction for some time after that, I just didn't have the bandwidth. So I went back to fiction. Soon I discovered that in the 15-20 years I had been reading nonfiction, fiction had made a lot of changes. Or, I guess, fiction writers had changed. Lots more women writers, and not just writing romances, lots deeper subjects, and lots more sex, among other things. And the romances are much better, women have power and authority, men use condoms, all good stuff. I read 4 books at once, 1 nonfiction and 3 fiction. That just works for me. My books are associated with where I read them, because I can't really carry them, so I have 1 on the table where I eat, 1 in the bathroom, 1 by my bed which needs to be light reading and not my Kindle (no screens before bed), and my nonfiction book which is by my therapy chair. Weird, but it works for me. My reading is a joke in the family, not a mean joke, but a running joke, since I get books in the mail all the time (I'm trying to cut back, really I am!). But the stroke took so much, I feel very lucky that I can still read and enjoy books. And I love it when you talk about your book club and the books you read, I've enjoyed several that you recommended.
ReplyDeleteRomance books---and I assume the same is true for other in genres---has change dramatically in the past few decades but we still can't shake the 'running joke' people have about those of us who like them. I, too, don't have the 'bandwidth' for a lot of non-fiction. I mostly listen to the books assigned for book club which works great for me.
DeleteThanks for backing up my romance reading choices. Still too many closet readers in a genre that outsells many others.