Welcome to the Misadventures of Widowhood blog!

In January of 2012 my soul mate of 42 years passed away after nearly 12 years of living with severe disabilities due to a stroke. I survived the first year after Don’s death doing what most widows do---trying to make sense of my world turned upside down. The pain and heartache of loss, my dark humor, my sweetest memories and, yes, even my pity parties are well documented in this blog.

Now that I’m a "seasoned widow" the focus of my writing has changed. I’m still a widow looking through that lens but I’m also a woman searching for contentment, friends and a voice in my restless world. Some people say I have a quirky sense of humor that shows up from time to time in this blog. Others say I make some keen observations about life and growing older. I say I just write about whatever passes through my days---the good, bad and the ugly. Comments welcome and encouraged. Let's get a dialogue going! Jean

Saturday, February 18, 2012

Ghost in the House

A little background here first before I tell you what my ghost has been doing: I have three wedding bands and I rarely wear any of them unless I’m going somewhere and then Don usually had to remind me to put a ring on my finger. I found that gesture so sweet and sentimental on his part, but that’s another story for another day. I hate wearing jewelry and always have. One ring, a diamond incrusted band of white gold, I got on my wedding day and that is reserved for dress up events. Then I have a tungsten ring which is considered to be the most wear-resistant material on the planet and that’s the one that I wear most often. Then I have a cheap band that, at times, fits better than the other two. That band is the one that’s been hanging on the bulletin board for nearly ten years.

In all those years that ring has hung on the bulletin board it’s never, ever fallen off the pin----until after Don passed away. The first time it happened was the day the minister came to the house to plan Don’s service. After he left, I opened up my computer cabinet and that ring was sitting right in front of the monitor. I picked it up, started laughing and I said out loud: “It’s true! They DO send messages from the other side!” I’d actually forgotten the band was on the bulletin board and it took me an hour to figure out where it had come from. None the less, I took its sudden appearance as a sign that Don approved of the service I had just planned. The spirit was happy, I thought, and he’ll fly away.

Wrong. The second time the silver band appeared where I hadn’t left it I found it on the floor a short distance from the computer cabinet. This time I thoroughly examined the pin that I hung the ring on. It seems secure enough. I wiggled the door the bulletin board is attached to, moved it back and forth trying to make the ring fall off the pin. It didn’t. How in the heck had the band fallen not once but twice? Ironically---or not---I found the ring on the floor just after a friend had been here to inventory Don’s gun collection for a large annual gun show and auction. If I truly believed in spirits---and I’m heading in that direction---I’d think Don is none too pleased with my decision to get his collection into the Cadillac of local gun auctions. Why else would his spirit throw the ring on the floor at that particular time? “Sorry, buddy boy, we don’t count ghost votes in this house. Don't try to make me feel guilty!”

The third time the ring came up missing from its home of ten years I found it on top of my checkbook. I don’t even want to guess what that’s supposed to mean, assuming Don’s spirit really is sending me messages from the other side. This time I briefly considered Crazy Gluing the band to the bulletin board, but for now I think I’ll let my little house guest keep playing with my head. Or maybe I’m just afraid that if I Crazy Glue the ring to the board someday I’ll find that whole big board with the ring attached tossed around the room and then I really will believe in ghosts. ©

1 comment:

  1. Update on the ring. It's been 18 months since Don passed away and the ring has only fallen off its pin one time since I wrote this and that within the same time frame. It's still just a big mystery...but I have to believe, now, it really was Don 'talking' to me.