I love computers when they work the way they’re supposed to but
then for some reason known only to the gods of software and routers, everything
changes. My printer wouldn’t talk to my computer and I had e-Bay labels I’d have
to print the next day. No problem, I
thought. It’s happened before and I breathed down the neck of a young tech guy wearing a black leather vest full of pockets that I lusted
after---the vest not the guy---as I wrote down the steps he took to get my
printer back online. And I used those directions a couple of times since
without a hitch. This time, however, when I followed the steps---deleting the
printer and then adding it back on---it didn’t work.
Long story still sort of long, I discovered my wireless printer
wouldn’t work from my backup computer either and Detective Nervous Wretch put
two and two together and decided I was dealing with a Wi-Fi issue. Yup, the
cell phone also had that explanation point next to the Wi-Fi icon---but wait! My
Kindle was still connecting to Wi-Fi and was working! Why? I checked the settings
thinking maybe I was piggy backing off someone else’s unsecured Wi-Fi. Nope. I
spent way too much time trying to troubleshoot this and that. Found directions
that involved turning off everything but the nightlight in the garage in an
effort to reboot the whole kitten caboodle. I didn’t have the guts to do it
before my e-Bay closings in case I couldn’t get my internet connected again. So
there I was on Sunday night after my auctions closed, writing addresses out
long-hand so I could get stuff to the post office in the morning. My plan was
to enter the tracking numbers at e-Bay, plus write this blog entry and schedule it, before
trying the whole reboot thing. If it failed I’d call Sexy Vest back to the house. If no blog appears on Saturday you'll know I'm curled up in a fetal ball wondering why I couldn't have been born in the era when long-distance communication required going down to the telegraph office to watch a guy tape my messages out in Morse code.
Stink bugs: Every fall they come to the south side of my
house to embed themselves into the vinyl siding to winter over. Some years I’ve
vacuumed them up with a little insect spray so they’d die before finding a way
to walk back down the vacuum hose to make a winter resort out of my closet. For
a few years I sprayed them with soapy water using a hose attached to a garden
sprayer. The soap makes it impossible for them to fly, they die and then I have
messy windows to clean. This year Mr. Google showed me how to make a cute
little stink bug collector out of a pop bottle. So every evening when they park
their slow-moving butts on my house, I’m on sentry duty every fifteen minutes, walking my deck looking for bugs to nudge into my trap. But it took them
too long to die and I hated that. They’re only doing what Mother Nature tells
them to do and for that they have to die slow? Does that seem fair? This morning I
put a little soapy water in the bottle---duh---hoping they’d drown and they did but not before they had panic attacks before finally falling victim to my assassination attempts. Made me wonder if fires, floods and
hurricanes aren’t God’s pop bottle trap…and that random thought makes me sound like a rabid, street
corner preacher. “Repent your sins! The end is near!” I really do feel like a Supreme Being to my stink bugs. It's not fun to have the power of life or death over so many living things.
Monday was my third Mondays Lunch with my Gathering Girls pals. We carpooled to a near-by village like so many other specks on the Michigan map, that was founded in the mid-1800s on an old Indian trail next to a river. They built a mill, a blacksmith shop and a few other buildings and most are still standing today. One of those buildings was a pub back in its day and is still a pub that serves food and that's where we ate. Their menu says they are an Irish pub with a polish owner and I had a corn beef and sauerkraut sandwich on rye that was wonderful, especially paired with sweet potato fries.
Monday was my third Mondays Lunch with my Gathering Girls pals. We carpooled to a near-by village like so many other specks on the Michigan map, that was founded in the mid-1800s on an old Indian trail next to a river. They built a mill, a blacksmith shop and a few other buildings and most are still standing today. One of those buildings was a pub back in its day and is still a pub that serves food and that's where we ate. Their menu says they are an Irish pub with a polish owner and I had a corn beef and sauerkraut sandwich on rye that was wonderful, especially paired with sweet potato fries.
There were six of us around the table and as usual we had lively conversations that went from bucket list activities like going on zip lines and hot air balloon rides to serious topics like human trafficking.
One woman had been to a lecture about the sex trade recently where she learned that according to the expert who spoke,
we average 400 girls (and boys) who get caught up in the trafficking trade
every year…in just our town! Of course, we came up with solutions that ranged
from teaching young teens not to be naïve thus easy pry to castrating the guys who’d buy them. I
don’t know if the business men at the next table were
listening and cringing when it was mentioned using a dull Bowie knife to do the
task, but I was proud that I didn’t suggest cooking those balls and adding them to Purina Swine and Pig Feed. Vengeful thoughts might be fun but should never be expressed in public...Oops! ©
Stink bug trap photos from Pinterest.
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| cut |
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| reverse top inside lower part of the bottle |
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| tape |
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| add a little soapy water |
A gentle nudge and a shake causes the slow moving bugs to fall down the slippery slop of the bottle.
The expert solution is, as you know, switch everything off (including router) for few minutes, then on again.
ReplyDeleteSome kind of wasps are determined to build a nest around the house each autumn. Last year, I stood precariously on a milk crate armed with a long pole doused in insecticide, to break up their nest. They didn't like it. But, in a few hours they were back again. We both persisted, and after many days they stopped returning. But they'll be back next autumn. And, no, I didn't feel guilty in destroying their nest. We were each following Nature's code.
Your last para had me furrowing my brow. I re-read it and, although 'castigating' fits, the next sentence makes clear that it was 'castration'. Auto-correct - I have the same problem. Some messages I send to the kids are just gibberish.
Hope to see your blog on Saturday - best of luck! Libby
My wi-fi cured itself, no thanks to me. But I ended up having to re-stall my printer drivers to get that working again. I was SO proud of myself for working through the problems without having to call and pay the tech guy.
DeleteI would not feel guilty about killing wasps, either. Bees, yes. We need bees but what are wasps needed for? I'm allergic to bees though.
I can't blame it on auto-correct. I thought I had spelled castrate and I thank you for mentioning it so I could correct it before too many people had an opportunity to read my mistake.
I'd wondered about 'castigating' myself, although the comment about the advice of the 'rabid, street corner preacher [to] “Repeat your sins!' was pretty amusing. Of course -- autocorrect! I don't use it, but I've heard some great stories about texts and emails that end up making no sense whatsoever. At least here it was pretty easy to figure out what was meant.
ReplyDeleteBut -- to you points, especially about the computer. I have a friend who has called me at least three times in the past couple of years while she was in the midst of trying to sort out computer-printer communication issues, and those were remarkable conversations. She's not given to profane language in almost any situation, but that computer is what makes the 'almost' qualifier necesssary. I think she might have finally bought a new printer, but I can't remember. It may be that she just was threatening the old one with replacement if it didn't behave.
Because we don't have the kind of winters you do, we're spared the autumn incursions of insects looking for a cozy home, but drought can do it. When water is in short supply, more than a few species will come looking for water, and it's an equally irritating occurrence. On the other hand, too much water will send ants up the interior walls of my building, and that's when I find out where the uncaulked cracks are around the baseboards. That's even more irritating.
Ah, well. There's some indication that we might have a cool front in ten days, that will lower the humidity and take the temperatures down to the 80s. We're all in high anticipation.
Ants are a pain and I'm luck not to have had any for many years. Sting bugs don't do any damage to houses, they just look ugly when they are walking around between the window and screen.
DeleteI can't blame auto-correct for my mistakes. I hurried this post up by a day which means it didn't get proof-read as many times as most. I have to write something, let it sit a few days then change the font style and do a final proof reading. I catch a lot of 'wrong words' used that way. You may (or not) be shocked at my unedited posts---lots of mistakes in spelling---and that's why I consider writing a blog therapy for my brain/dyslexia.
My printer gets into a snit about three times a year for some reason and refuses to talk to anyone. No idea why. Then, all it wants to do is scan, not print. And throw an error message that it is Low On Toner, despite having no such problem.
ReplyDeleteI think it's a Messenger-Infiltrator Machine, part of the Vanguard. Pretty soon, the rest will activate, and take over entirely.
I think my printer issues has something to do with Windows updates that no longer recognize the printer. It acts the same as yours...will scan from the machine but not talk to anyone. Enough to drive you crazy. And they want us to trust driver-less cars on the highways!
DeleteOkay let's start with, That is some headline! :-)
ReplyDeleteI too am seeing the stink bugs, You are making me rethink how I handle them!
Everyone I kill is one less breeding in my siding.
Delete" the vest not the guy " oh ya, you want me to believe that one Jean. LOL When I have a problem with my computer, the people in charge always tell me to turn off my router for a few minutes and then turn it back on. Guess what? It doesn't always work.
ReplyDeleteAn Irish pub that's owned by a Polish guy. I bet he also gives people spaghetti & meatballs. Now that would be a hoot.
What are stink bugs? What do they look like and do the stink?
Those people who destroy the lives in young boys & girls in the sex traffic life should be placed naked on the ground tied and then place the red fire ants all their bodies and play rock & roll music constantly over & over again. What do you think Jean? To easy for them?
Well have a great day my friend. See ya.
Cruisin Paul
The bug at the top in the photo is a sting bug. They say they smell when you kill them if you squash them but it isn't strong enough to bother me. Some years they come but the hundreds, this year they haven't been so bad. It's fun to catch them in the pop bottle but not fun to watch them die.
DeleteYour punishment people in the sex traffic trade needs the addition of honey or whatever the fire ants like to eat.
Ew! I hate all bugs that come inside without an invitation! We've been lucky so far this year ... no stink bugs. It's even worse in Maui where it never gets cold enough to kill nests of bugs. EW!
ReplyDeleteIt always seems technology throws me into a whirl when I HAVE to get something done! Never when I am printing things out for the boys ...
I'm surprised at how many areas of the country that get stink bugs. They haven't been bad this year here in Michigan.
DeleteThat stink bug trap is brilliant except that you have to do the deed yourself. A little soap in the water is smart for it breaks the surface tension and they will just sink. They get in my guest house and earn their name when they die. They do stink.
ReplyDeleteThere is another version of that same bottle that you somehow put a small battery light underneath and leave it outside overnight. From what I've read it really works great. A soapy pan of water with a desk lamp shining on it at night works too.
DeleteI've totally given up on printers, cost and headaches. Now I just save whatever I want printed in an email, go to the library, log into email and pay 15 cents a page. I don't print much anymore.
ReplyDeleteThat is a great backup plan for me to keep in mind for when I'm in a bind! Thanks for sharing that. Printers are SO frustrating!
DeleteGreat idea! And my library gives you ten FREE pages per day!
DeleteOh, I feel your computer pain.
ReplyDeleteStink bugs. They'll be here and soon. I try to flick them outside because I hate to kill them (because they stink). I think your method sounds good so long as we don't watch. A friend wrote an article once that got translated -- badly -- and retranslated -- badly -- in which it referred to stink bugs being a big problem in the Decrease Peninsula of Michigan. The link is down now. I wish I'd printed it out!
Thanks for your visit. Yes, dad's hat is right where it belongs and that feels so good for all of us!
I'm glad I don't live in that part of Michigan. LOL
DeleteOnce I added water to the bottle they die much quicker---hours rather than days---and I'm good with that now.
Boy, I tell ya.....you can waste HOURS trying to troubleshoot an issue with a printer. I always try the shut 'er down option first, but my heart sinks when that doesn't work. I'm still using Windows 7 and my laptop is too old to upgrade to 10, so don't know if that would help. But I sort of doubt it.
ReplyDeleteI think they come with frustration built in.
I couldn't even figure out how to turn off the router without researching where the button was. LOL But I worked my way through a lot of issues and got both computers and the printer back working. What a relieve! I was so proud of myself.
DeleteEgads! An assassin in our midst! Does castration come under the category of cruel and unusual punishment?
ReplyDeleteThe people who kidnap kids/teens and sell them for sex slaves aren't so much motivated by sex but rather money, I'm imagining. It's very cruel to sell another human being and even if they get away they have mental issues later on so, no I don't think castration is especially cruel, given the crime. We're not talking 'normal' pimps here. But would it stop them is the question.
DeleteI was being rather facetious and flippant with my question, but what you describe is certainly a serious issue. I don't know if castration would alter the behavior of such people whose motivation is money, but I doubt it. As for the others, like my nemesis, I'm not even sure it would have inhibited him. I think there's psych stuff going on even though they can be family men, function well, in some of our most trusted and admired professions.
DeleteThat's the thing that makes it hard, people are capable of being both bad in secret but good, even admired in public. Castration is one of those things that probably does more good for victims than it works to stop crimes. Crimes involving sex are as much (or more)about power as they are sexual gratification.
DeleteYou get funnier and funnier, Jean! You should really think about a book or newspaper column for your adventures in living.
ReplyDeleteThanks for making me smile...Deb
You mean blogging doesn't count as a by-weekly column? Darn! I thought it did. LOL
DeleteI was thinking more of a wider audience for you, using technology that doesn't require Sexy Vest to keep you operational, only the death of some trees...LOL!
DeleteAren't you sweet. If I was skinny, I'd buy one of those vests. I've wanted a pocket vest for decades, every since I saw a photographer for National Geographic wearing one. I'd probably hate it if I had one, like I do purses with too many pockets because I can never remember where I put stuff.
Delete