Welcome to the Misadventures of Widowhood blog!

Welcome to my World---Woman, widow, senior citizen seeking to live out my days with a sense of whimsy as I search for inner peace and friendships. Jeez, that sounds like a profile on a dating app and I have zero interest in them, having lost my soul mate of 42 years. Life was good until it wasn't when my husband had a massive stroke and I spent the next 12 1/2 years as his caregiver. This blog has documented the pain and heartache of loss, my dark humor, my sweetest memories and, yes, even my pity parties and finally, moving past it all. And now I’m ready for a new start, in a new location---a continuum care campus in West Michigan, U.S.A. Some people say I have a quirky sense of humor that shows up from time to time in this blog. Others say I make some keen observations about life and growing older. Stick around, read a while. I'm sure we'll have things in common. Your comments are welcome and encouraged. Jean

Saturday, July 9, 2022

The Air Force Pilot

We’ve been getting some outstanding speakers here at the continuum care complex as part of our Life Enrichment Program. Our latest was a pilot of an F-105 Thunderchief during the Vietnam War. Lieutenant James DeVoss’s plane was shot down during a bombing-run over Laos in 1969 and he was rescued by a group of para-rescue jumpers who found him on his back in a bamboo patch with bamboo shoots impaling him so he couldn’t move and he suffered numerous injuries caused by being ejected from the plane. “His left arm shattered, both hips were dislocated and his knees were separated. In the right knee, every tendon, every piece of cartilage, every ligament was completely torn apart. One nerve; one blood vessel with some skin around it, was all that remained to keep his lower leg alive. Another 8th of an inch, it would have ripped apart, and he would have bled to death." (Quote from a USA Today article.) We had a genuine purple heart recipient and highly decorated pilot in front of us.

For first half hour of his talk he described in great detail the training that Air Force pilots go through, not only on how to fly and how to eject from an aircraft that’s malfunctioning but he also described the training pilots get on how to survive behind enemy lines and how survive being a POW. Up until this point we didn't know about him getting shot out of the sky and my cynical side was thinking, This old guy is here to relive his glory days. But then he switched from talking about training to showing a film of his plane getting shot down and the rescue that followed and it started sinking in---how much this man had suffered through and survived. 

The para-rescue jumpers had done many missions like that one before but for some reason the Air Force decided to make a documentary of one of them and his rescue was the one that got filmed. It was that footage that the lieutenant was able to show us. I’ve never been a gun-ho supporter of the military but watching and listening to this man I gained a real appreciation for the sacrifice, courage and training pilots in the Air Force go through to serve our country.

My Mahjong teacher and her husband both served in the Air Force and sat next to me at the lecture. There were five or six others in the room who’d also been in the Air Force so you can image the quality of the questions that were asked during the Q & A part of the lecture. I asked if he’s flown planes after his years-long recovery and he did---not in the Air Force but he got certificated in some civilian crafts and taught for awhile. Afterward some of us where talking in the lobby and one woman said she wanted to ask if he had any mental therapy to deal with PTSD but she didn’t dare, felt it was too personal, and I remarked that I’ll bet doing talks like this probably helps with that and the chronic pain his wife said he still has to this day. 

But I was probably wrong. After finding him online I discovered that in 2017 he was inducted into the Michigan Aviation Hall of Fame and because of the “enshrined results” of that honor (research done) he became a Motivational Speaker. His presentation wasn’t born out of a need to tell his story but rather out of a renewed sense of wonder that he survived at all. Somewhere on his website he says he’s sharing his story to say “thanks for my everything” to the men who saved him.

Given all the crazy stuff going on in our country I don’t feel very proud of the U.S.A. right now so this was the perfect lecture to see the week of the Fourth of July. It gave me a little of that pride back again....if only temporarily. ©

35 comments:

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    1. Wow, is right. When you think of the danger everyone was in to rescued him too, it truly is a miracle story.

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  2. Thanks for this. Our eldest son went into the Air Force and his first duty station was in South Korea, mere miles from the demilitarized zone. Wow... that pilot had to have had angels on both wings of his airplane. Amazing.

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    1. Those guys get months and months of training and as I was listening to him I thought that some people truly do have better brains than the rest of us.

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  3. An amazing story amongst so many untold stories. Thanks for sharing it.

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    1. Makes me wonder how many pilots got shot down during that war and how many were recovered or rescued. The para-jumpers have skills and guts too.

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  4. Thanks for sharing this post, Jean. I think most of us would benefit from a shot in the arm when it comes to feeling national pride. The thing that I try to keep in mind, is that many of those who fought for the USA during those years, did not choose to enlist--they were drafted. I still remember young men and their loved ones dreading finding out what their number was. My husband and I became more interested in hearing war stories after our son (our adopted foster son, I talked about a few weeks ago) served in the Air Force for 20 years. He doesn't complain much, but he has issues with his wrists, knees and back due to his work. There's a little space in the cabin, behind the pilot, and that's for the navigator/weapons person (can't remember the title). That's what our boy did. All 6 feet 3 inches of him crouched down for entire flights. Some people might disagree, but I do believe it helps us to revisit our history. We can be proud of some of it, and ashamed, as well, but one thing for sure, we can learn from it.

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    1. I couldn't agree more about revisiting our history. We have to learn from our past mistakes and accomplishments. I, too, remember a night when a bunch of young guys (friends of my husband's nephew) were in the living room trying to talk a friend out of running to Canada to avoid the draft.

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  5. What horrific injuries that poor man received and according to his wife, still suffers from. Makes you proud of men like him and those who risked all to come to his aid.

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    1. Those para-jumpers work in civilian situations too to do rescues. They really have to train for every possibility.

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  6. I dated a guy for awhile who was a medic in the Marine Corps during Vietnam. He had also done a stint in the Navy. I have always been anti-war but gained a deep appreciation for the sacrifices those boys (mostly boys in those days although I also knew a young woman who served in Vietnam as a nurse) made.
    It certainly broadened my thinking. So glad you had this experience.
    Nina

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    1. I was not anti-war during the Vietnam War. It was only in the decades that followed when we learned more about the how and why we were there that I got more cynical about military in general. Those who served in the war were mostly boys right out of high school. I think all my fellow residents who were in the Air Force joined during college so they didn't get drafted into the Army and they were commissioned officers.

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  7. What an interesting story. It's really quite wonderful, the diversity of speakers and events you have there.

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    1. We have a wonderful Life Enrichment Director who fills our calendar with all kinds of stuff...far more than I even write about.

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  8. Sounds like a great speaker and a real hero. Thanks for sharing his story, Jean.

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    1. We really do get some great speakers here. I know what they cost to bring them here because of what we paid at the senor hall from the same speaker pool that makes the rounds of senior places and it surprises me our management does it for our small group.

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  9. I didn't support the Vietnam war, but I was baffled by the protesters who took their opposition out on returning soldiers. With few exceptions, they didn't ask to be sent to fight a senseless war and deserved far more respect for their sacrifices. A disproportionate of the older male homeless are Vietnam vets.
    Lyndon Johnson did some wonderful things, but him lying to us while our boys were over there fighting and dying turned my stomach. This man is living testimony to the sacrifice so many have made in wars which politicians start. I felt my heart swell for him as I was reading this post, and he's continued to serve by giving these talks. The nobility, bravery and honor displayed by him (and all the others like him) is still present in much of America.
    I don't know what to make of the extremes on both sides who are making a mockery of our great country.

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    1. The Vietnam vets have gotten a raw deal. My husband had a friend who was handling barrows of Agent Orange all through the war and had all kinds of medical problems that the Army didn't own up to causing the soldiers involved in agent Orange. He committed suicide because of his medical issues but it took over 20 years before those guys and their families got the military to admit anything and that happened just a few years after he killed himself.

      The extremes are killing our country. Democracies can't survive without compromise and we've lost that big time.

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  10. That's quite a story! I think the young men who fought in Vietnam got such a raw deal -- if they survived. I wasn't a war protester but I do remember the draft numbers being drawn and my classmates watching with fear. I agree with LS Nelson, in that I never understood treating the soldiers returning home with anger or disdain. And after watching The Vietnam War Documentary by Ken Burns, I was angry over the lives lost and the way the government lied to us. I think that was a huge part of the distrust of government that has grown since. We are in a tough space. But that Air Force pilot is a real hero. Thanks for sharing his story.

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    1. He does presentations around this area. Tuck his name in the back of your mind because you might get a chance to see him in person.

      Ken Burns is such a thorough documentary. I love everything he does but I haven't wanted to see the Vietnam War one but I think you're right about when the distrust and disenchantment about our country started when the truth started coming out.

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  11. Yes, hearing of any of the many Sacrificial Heroes who have given us all so many take for granted is always somber and makes us more appreciative that so many have given so much, some gave all. The Man's story he doesn't tell to many, most real Heroes don't. I'm always Surprised his Family seemed more Prideful of the Son who made the most Money and not the one who made the most Sacrifices for Country. It seems in America we often honor Monetary Success over real Heroic deeds. The word Hero is now thrown out and around so much that it diminishes who should be identified as one. That Pilot turned his pain into Purpose and I admire that... and what he and many others have Sacrificed. Only now does The Man ever get people Thank him for his Service, it was a long time coming, especially the Vietnam Era Soldiers who were treated so badly when they came Home.

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  12. Unbelievable. I will never understand war but I thank every single person who gives of their time and effort. A hero for sure. And especially those who rescued him.

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  13. Yup, no matter how one feels about that war no one had a right to treat the veterans the way they were treated. They were just following orders and in many cases serving their country just like their fathers and grandfathers before them.

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    1. I can't imagine what it was like for people who served in that war and who got treated so badly until recent decades.

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  14. One of my cousins has a son who flew with his father in small planes for years. Once he graduated from high school, and I think had some college behind him, he joined the Navy, and began working to become a pilot. Eventually, he ended up flying off a carrier in the Red Sea and elsewhere during the Iran-Iraq wars. Then, he came back to Texas and began training the next generation of pilots here in Texas. I had the chance to spend a Thanksgiving with he and his training-mates one year, and it was a fascinating experience. They seemed so much like boys (and some girls), and yet their dedication was obvious. The civilian leadership of the military can make some remarkably wrong-headed decisions, but from what I've seen of servicemen and servicewomen, I can't help being impressed. I got even more impressed when Kelly took us to the hangers and showed us the trainers with their 'tail hooks.' Land on a carrier, with only a wire to catch that gizmo at the rear end? Can you say adrenalin rush?

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    1. What a great experience you had. This guy said he's never met a pilot who wasn't an Adrenalin junkie.

      We have some x-serviceman and women running for office this time so I hope some get elected and bring that same kind of dedication back to our government. Tammy Duckworth has.

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  15. I like the things they offer you at your new home. That sounded like a very nice lecture. As for America. I feel the same way. Disappointed in us in every damn way sadly. Someone said to move. If my house had a leak I would not move, I'd repair it, find a way to fix it. Same here. But no one wants my opinion. :-)

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    1. Telling someone to move if they don't like what is going one in our country is so stupid. That's like saying America can do no wrong and nothing needs fixing or improving. How arrogant is that?

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  16. What a horror that man went through. And to think--his is only one story. I know there are many, many more that we will never know of.

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    1. So true. One detail he told that I couldn't get out of my mind is how the Viet Cong back then would torture prisoners by impaling them in a bamboo patch and the bamboo shoots would grow up through their bodies at the rate of 3-4 inches a day and come out the other side. He wasn't in that patch long enough for that to happen but thinking about that afterward sure would give you nightmares.

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  17. This speaker is a real winner.

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  18. I can appreciate that your pilot speaker would have made such an impression on you. The patriotism I recall from WWII days permeated our whole nation then and for some years after, but seems to have gradually decreased during the ensuing later years. I wonder if our nation's peoples will ever experience that kind of unity again. Our "wars" afterward seemed different beginning with the Korean "police action". People who went into the military may not all have enlisted prompted by the same motivations for doing so though I'm sure a sense of patriotism was instilled in our now volunteer enlistees. The realities of what they all experience doesn't differentiate when it comes down to trying to survive.

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    1. Good observations.

      Our wars now seem to be pseudo wars where two super powers fight each other but on the soil of a small country while pretending we're not really at war.

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