Welcome to the Misadventures of Widowhood blog!

Welcome to my World---Woman, widow, senior citizen seeking to live out my days with a sense of whimsy as I search for inner peace and friendships. Jeez, that sounds like a profile on a dating app and I have zero interest in them, having lost my soul mate of 42 years. Life was good until it wasn't when my husband had a massive stroke and I spent the next 12 1/2 years as his caregiver. This blog has documented the pain and heartache of loss, my dark humor, my sweetest memories and, yes, even my pity parties and finally, moving past it all. And now I’m ready for a new start, in a new location---a continuum care campus in West Michigan, U.S.A. Some people say I have a quirky sense of humor that shows up from time to time in this blog. Others say I make some keen observations about life and growing older. Stick around, read a while. I'm sure we'll have things in common. Your comments are welcome and encouraged. Jean

Wednesday, October 21, 2020

The Nature Strip

I have a computer folder labeled “Working on Drafts and Ideas.” But in reality the files within it are mostly a collection of random paragraphs that I’d hoped to build into full blog posts. When nothing much is going on in my life I might look through some of those files hoping I can incorporate one of those topic sparks into a 900 to 1,000 word essay. Too often than not I’ll find those ideas have or will expire soon like the following paragraph if I don't use it before I move:

“Three guys showed up this week to cut down a dead Scotch pine in my nature strip. Good looking and tan guys, not an ounce of fat on their beautiful bodies. (I might be old but I still enjoy eye candy.) I thought the tree was about hundred foot tall but the internet says they usually grow to sixty foot. Still, it was tall enough to come crashing through my bedroom in a storm, so I’m glad it’s gone. You should have seen one of the guy’s shimmy his way up to top of that tree to tie a rope around it. He had monkey-like skills. They took that tree down in four sections, ground it up into wood chips, cleaned up some dead vines along my tree line and were out of here in less than an hour. There goes $450 but it’s a bargain price compared to what I’d pay it if fell on the house and I had to have the roof, master bath and bedroom rebuilt.”

That was two summers ago and it truly was a bargain compared to what I just shelled out to have the vegetation in another part of the nature strip behind my house cut down. I have it done every 3-4 years when it starts encroaching on the yard, looking like something out of a horror film where voices whisper across the red sumac luring virgins within. At least I've been safe on that score, having given my virginity away at 25. (Don't judge. It might have been the '60s but I was old school saving it for marriage. Oops, I didn't make it.) This time it was two guys who showed up to work---boys really, in their twenties---skinny no-butt kids with long hair tied back in high ponytails and iPod buds jammed their ears. Eye candy, no way! If it wasn’t for the fact that they were being paid $500 for the task I would have put on my grandmotherly hat and baked them cookies to serve with milk. The price quote was a hundred more than I paid the last time this clear-cut was done but that last time the outfit that did the work they left too much of the sumac behind and it took them forever and four days of off-and-on work. The skinny-butt crew had it done in two hours!

This past month I’ve been running into all kinds of things that I’ll---hopefully---never have to do again like the nature strip maintenance and getting the trim painted on the outside doors. I also spent an afternoon trimming the shrubs and cutting down perennials, reveling in the fact that I should be out of this house by the time it needs doing again. And here is where I need to look skyward and apologize to my sister-in-law who, several years before she died, told me she was ready to go into a nursing home because dealing with her grass in the summer and snow in the winter was getting too much for her. I was shocked that anyone would willing want to go into a nursing home. “All you do,” I said, “is make two phone calls and write two checks! How hard can that be?” Color me with egg on my face because I’m finding myself often replaying that conversation in my head and I'm not looking like the brightest bulb in the box. Keeping up with service people---finding the good ones, having the bad ones let you down---is more than just making a couple of phone calls and writing out the payment checks.

Another file in my folder of ideas that will expire if I don’t use it before I move also involves the nature strip behind my house. There is a six by twenty foot patch back there covering with wild black berries and this is what I wrote a few summers ago: “I don’t give the wild black berries much thought except when I see the guy who works for my lawn care service picking some (with my permission). They’ve just ripened up and this week I saw something laugh-out-loud funny going on. A young squirrel was jumping up to the top of the raspberry bushes to get at the berries. The branches couldn’t support his weight so he’d ride them down to the ground, eat a few berries then jump up to retrieve another branch. At the same time a cardinal was after the same batch of berries and he was none too happy about the squirrel giving him competition.”

My nature strip does support a lot of wildlife and I will miss it after I move. It runs across the backs of all the lots in my block, ending with a lake at one end. My section of the nature strip is 175 long and varies in width with the widest part in the photo up above. Neighbors on both sides have all trees in their sections while three quarters of mine is more field-like to support birds, bees and butterflies. I’ve seen every kind of birds back there including those big enough to hunt and carry off rabbits. (It's gross but I've seen it happen.) I’ve seen possums, skunk, badgers, raccoons, rabbits, one snake and a couple house cats who seem to think the area is one big litter box and I don’t care because they also like to hunt mice.

I did it! I took a couple files from my “Working on Drafts and Ideas” folder and was able to weave them together with some current stuff going on in my life to come up with this post. Somewhere out there in the ether of writing instructors and coaches is one giving me a red ink grade for my effort. © 

 Every time I get fresh flowers from the supermarket I save the heads and throw them out in the nature strip in the fall. I never know what will survive but it's always colorful back there from year to year, from month to month. No matter what, I can always count on tiger lilies and queen Anne's lace. The first photo is early spring, the other photos are mid and late summer.





35 comments:

  1. I laughed at your description of the squirrels' antics. Thanks to my squirrel-friendly ways, the critters are passing the word, and there's no end to the entertainment. I'm a little surprised to see the fox and gray squirrels getting along, but it may be that plentiful resources (read: peanuts) is helping to make that possible.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Feeding squirrels is worth every penny. They bring so much entertainment to your yard. We are just starting to see black squirrels where I live.

      Delete
  2. Yep, you did it! You found enough to fill a blog post, make it interesting & fun to read. Pretty flowers! But, you didn't invite the eye candy to stick around?!! Highly disappointed.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Desperate times call for desperate measures when it comes to blogging.

      You know, if you talk to eye candy too long it spoils the illusion that you're still young enough handle guys like that without going into diabetic shock.

      Delete
  3. Your nature strip is so pretty with those flowers and grasses.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I really love it and am so glad I didn't have it put into grass when we built the house. A landscape planner suggested leaving it field-like for wildlife and I've never been sorry. In the early years I sowed it with wildflower seeds but after a couple of years it self seeded.

      Delete
  4. Love how you wove those notes into your post. The nature strip flowers and animal antics are wonderful.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you. I'll probably work on emptying out my 'Drafts and Ideas' file if nothing much happens over the winter.

      Delete
  5. It's the mental load of all that work that is the killer. If you could do it yourself, it would actually be easier on you, I bet.

    Love the photos. And I'm envious of your black squirrels. They are very rare here, and I love them.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My husband and I were harder workers and never---until his stroke---we never hired home maintenance help. WE could do it all including remodeling, plumbing, roofing, etc.

      There is a town 70 miles away that is known for their black squirrels and I was in my teens the first time I saw one/them. Then about five years ago I started seeing one or two every times I'd head out of the neighborhood, about a block away. Then two year ago I actually had one at bird feeder. They are so beautiful!

      Delete
  6. Beautiful nature strip and flowers! We also paid the long dollar for tree work at our previous home. It does beat having it fall on you. :-) And I'm enjoying watching the yard outside getting it's autumn tasks completed with no effort on my part. For many years I thought it was worth it. Until I didn't.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I will miss my back yard view but I'm hoping I'll be able to replace it with a short hike to the public areas of the CCC.

      I'll be lucky to get out of here without having to deal with another tree, that one won't hurt a thing if it falls. It's not dead but just keeps leaning and leaning until the weight of it takes it down---probably one winter day with the extra weight of snow.

      Delete
  7. I have reached the point of having to hire work done. Finding someone decent is a chore. That tree removal was really rather inexpensive and entertaining. I am hunting someone now to get my overgrowth around the edges.
    Cool idea to cast the flower heads to the wild. Great recycle.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The tree wasn't close enough to the house to make their job hard which is probably why it didn't cost much. We've got some great, reliable tree guys in my area.

      The kids who did the overgrowth in my nature strip had a power tool that looked like a long-handed, gas powered scythe.

      Delete
  8. Your nature strip is so beautiful and colorful and full! Love it!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You would love it Molly, especially around 4:00 when the neighbor's cat comes over to hunt back there.

      Delete
  9. I've never heard of a nature strip, but it's a lovely idea. Well, when you don't have to maintain it. I enjoyed your reality check about how difficult it is to find anyone to do things around your property. If it was only as simple as writing the two checks...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The landscape planner who suggested it said at the time that it was a new concept to use in urban developments. The idea is that each person on both sides of the back property line leaves a certain portion natural for wildlife and to get more privacy from your back lot neighbors. It works, too because you can't really talk over the distance.

      Delete
  10. your backyard with that nature strip is so beautiful, such beautiful, colorful flowers, I bet you are going to miss this view when you move to your new home. my hubby loves the yard work that's his stress buster. I am keeping list of handyman from nextdoor neigbhours app when hubby can't do it any more, till then I am going to enjoy our yard, though in new construction our living space inside home is more than our yard, so its not big of an issue, we will nee cleaning lady for inside home & yard guy for outside when hubby & I both won't be able to do. we have lot of fat gray squirrels they come on our feeder & act as if they are birds so that we don't see them lol. never seen black squirrel. I was just kidding with hubby & telling hubby the day we see mouse on our feeder, we will stop this bird feeding project which is truly entertaining for both of us right now

    Asha

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've used the Handyman app with good luck and my friend Tim actually gets work from them for kind of services he offers so I know they do back ground checks.

      It really hurt a lot when I had to quit feeding the birds because it was attracting mice, not just at the feeder but in my basement. You can move your feeders farther in your yard but then I'd have to shovel more in the winter to fill up the feeders. Now I have a water source to attract birds to my deck rail. I don't see as many birds but it does bring some in for baths and drinking.

      Delete
  11. the second wave is starting and in a pandemic it is usually the 2nd wave that kills the majority of people. You baby boomers are all going to die of corona-virus and finally the world will be able to make progress when you boomers are all dead

    ReplyDelete
  12. That Nature Strip is Magnificent, but I totally understand our Senior Logic coming into play about Maintenance being something to seriously consider. If we cannot do it ourselves we must not only find, but afford, competent Staff to hire regularly to do it for us. I'd have plenty of $$$ squirreled away for my Dental needs if I hadn't already exhausted it on Tree Doctor Arborist people for the sake of our Magnificent Trees on this new Property. And I'm glad you Called me Out on the Dental, it's Fear my Dear, but I suspect you already knew that and the Safety factor a mere handy excuse? *winks* I'm Fearful of Dentists, the cost always being in the stratosphere and taking YEARS to pay off for one visit and now it's compounded by a Plague where they would be inches from my Face while I'm not able to wear my Mask so I have a Panic Attack, literally, I almost need to be sedated to get thru just having a Crown glued back on which was no Big Deal at all. I don't know what's wrong this time but I suspect whatever it is could be very expensive and we can't afford it... so I Fear having that estimate and then realizing I just have to endure the pain because I can't afford a hefty Monthly payment for Years coupled with this new Home's expenses and still raising a Child to Maturity. I'm scheming of ways to supplement income again so I just have ready Cash set aside quickly again to replace the almost Two Grand the Trees cost me.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Okay, here's what you do: You get a bottle of whiskey and a pair of piers. You and your husband do shots until the bottle is 3/4 gone, then give your husband the piers. Next step, tell him to pour a shot of whiskey over the piers, then pull that pesky tooth. Use the rest of the whiskey for your follow-up care.

      Delete
    2. Wow you go Old School Wild West don'tcha?! *LMAO* The Native American in me would go on the Warpath with that much Fire Water and The Man would be scared for his Scalp! *winks* I think the only time I ever got truly drunk was on Scotch Whiskey at a party my Parents were actually at... they never drank and I should never have partaken, boy was I a Hot Mess after just a lightweight amount of it! I can't even stand the smell of Whiskey now, it must have given me PTSD? *LOL*

      Delete
    3. My dad used to tell stories about the denial work he had to do on his own father and they always involved whiskey and piers. LOL

      Delete
    4. Ah, the Parents hardship Stories can't be topped by us wussy Modern folk, can they? *LOL* My Dad, growing up on the Rez, never saw a Dentist until he joined the Service... due to malnutrition and lack of adequate Care he lost all his Teeth by Age 21 and had to get Dentures that the Air Force provided. I probably wouldn't have Survived his rough Childhood, in fact I know I wouldn't have. Our Parents came from tough stock or they simply didn't survive their Childhood.

      Delete
  13. I love your nature strip, but I'm so glad I don't have to maintain it! Beautiful pictures.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It doesn't take much maintenance. Other than cutting down the dead tree and the hiring the clear cuts there is nothing else to do, and the clear cuts don't have to be done at all. I just don't want it to turn into more woods.

      And I would not want to do all the work your husband does to keep a defensive area around your mountain top house and it's surrounded by a giant nature strip that goes on for miles. Spectacular views up there on your land.

      Delete
  14. That nature strip is stunning! WOW. We need to do that more so the critters have a place to call home! Today is blogging day for me and I have NOTHING!!!!! I need to start a file ... THANK YOU for blogging!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's me that needs to thank people like you who keep coming back to read. I'm not sure it would be any where near as much fun to keep a blog if it was more like a secret diary.

      Delete
  15. Look at all those pretty blooms! They're so cheerful. Did you hear the weather is supposed to go big snow soon? Next week, I think. Tree removal and big cutting is pricey. I'll have to have someone tackle some bushes I can't do myself next spring. Meanwhile, hope all's ok for now!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh, no, not snow this early!!!!! I did hear it's going to be an extra snowy and cold winter here in MI this year.

      Delete

Thanks for taking the time to comment. If you are using ANONYMOUS please identify yourself by your first name as you might not be the only one. Comments containing links from spammers will not be published. All comments are moderated which means I might not see yours right away to publish through for public viewing as I don't sit at my computer 24/7.