Welcome to the Misadventures of Widowhood blog!

In January of 2012 my soul mate of 42 years passed away after nearly 12 years of living with severe disabilities due to a stroke. I survived the first year after Don’s death doing what most widows do---trying to make sense of my world turned upside down. The pain and heartache of loss, my dark humor, my sweetest memories and, yes, even my pity parties are well documented in this blog.

Now that I’m a "seasoned widow" the focus of my writing has changed. I’m still a widow looking through that lens but I’m also a woman searching for contentment, friends and a voice in my restless world. Some people say I have a quirky sense of humor that shows up from time to time in this blog. Others say I make some keen observations about life and growing older. I say I just write about whatever passes through my days---the good, bad and the ugly. Comments welcome and encouraged. Let's get a dialogue going! Jean

Wednesday, June 23, 2021

Remind me, Who's Bright Idea was it to Move?

Remember the under the counter light fixture that fell in the middle of the night? I no more than got that one put back up when a few days later the second one fell. Why did all those screws that had been holding those fixtures in place for nearly two decades decide it’s time to give up on their sworen duty to preform?  Inquiring minds want to know. It’s one of the mysteries of life that fits in the category of being an inconvenience but not a disaster so I’m trying to keep these hiccups in prospective. Over 50 houses in the neighborhood were built within two years of one another by the same builder. If I had more time I'd start a support group for people with light fixtures that killed an assortment of countertop appliances.

One of the jobs on my To-Do list to get ready to list the house was to put new numbers on my mailbox. First impressions matter and my numbers were---well, old, faded out and tattered. I took my trusty single-edged razor blade and some Goo-Gone down to the street and managed to remove the old and stubborn numbers. I’ve never learned the fine art of letting the Goo Gone sit and do its job which means I end up making any job that require Goo Gone harder than it needs to be. Someone should learn from my mistakes but apparently it's not going to be me. As I was putting the new numbers on I noticed a wasp going in a finger hole on the back flap of the box, the box where I’d been putting my project supplies. I peeked inside and sure enough they’ve got a nest in there. I’m allergic to bees so I don’t mind telling you I felt like I’d suddenly found myself in a hostage situation. One wrong move and I’d be dead in five minutes. Finally, I catapulted into action and suited myself up with a long-sleeved shirt, hat, gloves and a can of wasp and bee spray but when I pressed the button on the can that is supposed to spray liquid 18 feet it wouldn’t even reach the back of the box. So this simple To-Do job ended with a trip to the store for another can of spray and eventually I’ll have to swing by hazardous waste to drop off the can that didn’t work.

I’m sitting in front of my old laptop and making typing mistakes one right after another. I don’t get why the whole world isn’t rising up against straight-line keyboards and forcing companies to make a laptop with ergonomic keyboard built-in and banishing all the straight-in keyboards to the trash heap of bad ideas. They say there is a learning curve to learning how to use an ergonomic keyboard but I’m suffering the reverse learning curve. After only a few days I’m already feeling my carpal tunnel getting worse.

Since I'll have to go the county’s recycling center for the spray can I decided it will be a good time to go to the next building over to drop off my old Logitech Ergo keyboard along with my defunct computer tower. Once I move and get settled in to my new desk I’ll get another curved keyboard and until then I’ll limp though using the laptop like everyone else seems to do without complaining like I do. My old Ergo keyboard had developed a few skipping and sticky keys and I’d worn the lettering off the keys so badly that I had to buy the key replacement decals. Twice! And isn’t it interesting that they even sell key replacement decals for just about any device on the market. I guess it’s not so interesting, now that I think about it. You can still buy replacement letters and numbers for those old typewriters and cash registers from the early 1900s or at least you could two years ago when I bought a one cent key for a brass cash register that I was getting ready to sell. That little dime-sized disk cost a small fortune.

I’ve been so busy lately working on my To-Do List for getting the house up for sale. The carpet cleaners were here, the A/C maintenance guy, too. The son-I-wish-I-had started power washing the house but only got one side done because he had to leave to take his wife to ER. She was having severe chest pains. I hate that she/they had to spend two days in the hospital but I'm glad that instead of it being heart related it turned out to be steroid related. She’d been taking them for a case of poison ivy. Final answer to the question you’re probably asking: Yes, Tim and I are behind on our Master Plan but that’s okay. Thursday will be the very definition of a Three Ring Circus at my house. He’ll finish up the power washing (just in time for the window cleaners on Monday) while I’m inside talking to my realtor who is coming over to run some numbers by me and to see how close I am to picture taking time. Also on Thursday a woman from the East Coast is picking up my beloved oak roll top desk that she bought on e-Bay. Now, there's a lady who knows how to bring great souvenirs home from vacation. ©

41 comments:

  1. The Madness of a Move will subside, you'll get thru this, breathe!

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    1. I remember when you were going through this that I thinking the stress would kill you and since it didn't you're my roll model for the next few months.

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    2. LMAO, Yes, I remember it Well Jean, I thought it would Kill me too... proof that whatever doesn't Kill us just makes us Stronger my Friend!

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  2. Good luck! My heart goes out to you.

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  3. What kind of super meds are you on? any chance of sharing? I get panicked when I think the car battery might be flat or the help can't come or the shopping comes late. Are you just naturally brave and endlessly active or have you acquired superwoman qualities?

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    1. I wish I had super powers, don't we all. My method of getting through stuff is making lists and when things go wrong like frying my old computer or light fixtures falling is to walk away for a few hours or days and let the back of my mind come up with a solution.

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  4. Oh Jean, I'm with you when it comes to moving. There are times when it nearly overwhelms! I cannot believe another light strip came down. Too weird. It's making me second guess my decision to have them installed in our remodeled kitchen (in the itty bitty house we're moving to in the fall). So glad you didn't get stung by a wasp. They can be so fast. I want to encourage you and all of us who are working harder than usual to hang in there. Try to rest when possible. Find something to laugh about as often as possible. Breathe. Believe we'll get through the tough times. Best wishes to you Jean!

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    1. I couldn't stand not having under the cabinet lights. The new ones are much lighter than the old style I have so I wouldn't fear new ones coming down.

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  5. Sorry about your carpal tunnel acting up. I have recently learned, it never really goes away.
    I have never seen an ergo keyboard and may have to check into one. Glad you were able to dispatch the wasps safely. That had to be scary.

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    1. I will be more than ready to get a new ergo keyboard set up with my new laptop while I might write about in post. They also have great wrist support along with the right angle to type for the human body.

      I try to stay very calm and slow around bees and wasps. Better to freeze than run. The scary part was how many times I reached into that box not knowing they were they.

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  6. The details didn't matter. As soon as I read your title, I laughed, sighed, and thought, "My gosh, I'm glad it's her and not me again." There was a time when I moved so often I thought nothing of it, but with any luck my last move will be my last. Your ergonomic keyboard's interesting. I didn't know they made such things. I guess I have a straight one, and it hasn't caused me any problems, but I'm glad you've found a solution that suits you. Personally, I'm fine with my iPad in a keyboard case rather than a laptop. I sure can't stand using those pads; I have to have a real keyboard, whatever its shape.

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    1. I have trouble seeing the iPad screens and typing on tiny pads like phones and my kindle for more than a short comment or just going around the internet. Ergonomic keyboards are really comfortable for your hands, wrists, neck and backs. They've been around a long time. I don't even remember a time when I didn't have one.

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  7. You are so near the finish line and have been at this for a long time so no wonder you are hitting some rough spots! In our real estate market they are telling sellers to not bother spiffing up their home or fixing minor things as it will sell for over asking price anyway. Curious what the market where you are is doing right not? Hopefully you will get more than you imagine and go happily off to your new home.

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    1. The market is scary hit and I'm worried the bubble will burst just as mine goes on the market. All it would take is a shift in the interest rates.

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  8. I wonder if "voice activation software" would help you solve your typing problem. I don't know why I thought of it because I have never used it but I googled it and you can dictate to your computer instead of type. I wonder if you could get used to that?! It would save your wrists, hands,etc...
    Your house will sell quickly even if it is not perfect! Housing inventory is low right now and people are anxious to buy! Great for you!

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    1. I use voice activation for doing text messaging. I do like it. LOL but you have to be careful not to use it with TV going in the back ground. I'll have to try it on my new laptop.

      I'm not worried about my house selling fast, but I am worried about the timing the closing with my move-in date and how that effects where my stuff will go in between.

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  9. Don't you just hate it when one simple job turns into a whole project? I'm glad you found the wasps before they found you. My keyboard has some sticky keys, not the least of which is the space key so I bought a new one this weekend which I like a lot. Probably good. My old keyboard is missing type on so many of the letters, only a touch typist can use it. At least I know what letters to pick if I'm ever on Wheel of Fortune.

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    1. We're from the era of touch typing for sure.

      Before I junk my old keyboard I'm going to try to take off some of those keys that stick. Not to try to save them but rather as an experiment for the future. I've never had the guts to do it before.

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  10. since I am in this mode it stresses me out to read others situation as well.
    I am just going to be stress girl until this is over! Good Luck Jean

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    1. It comforts me in way to know I'm not the only one goes through the moving woes.

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  11. "Eyes on the Prize", Jean! That was my mantra during my move. Feel free to use it yourself.

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  12. Yes, I feel your pain as my own from 11 years ago! At least our condo was almost move in ready .... new buyers kept pressuring to move in SOONER. Lots of mistakes were made but nothing life threatening. I would like to have a master suite but not sure if it's worth moving for!

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    1. My move-in date or rather move out date will be the deal breaker for me.

      When those boys get a little older I'll bet you think the pain of moving where you have a master suite won't look so bad compared to sharing a bath with two teens.

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  13. I have a bluetooth keyboard for my laptop, and the space bar won't behave. Sometimes it spaces; sometimes it doesn't. Drives me batty.

    I've actually learned to modify my touch-type and use both thumbs now to space! Ridiculous!

    You're still moving forward and making progress. That's the key.

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    1. That's what I keeping telling myself. As long as I get at least something done every day, I try not to worry about the things that aren't done.

      My old Ergo keyboard is bluetooth too, and I know the problem with sticky and skipped keys is too much junk under the keys---dust, hair, food crumbs. When I replace it I'm getting a protective cover for it. Since my computer has always been in the kitchen I have/had a bad habit of eating over my keyboard and that is stopping as of now. and won't happen again.

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  14. When life gets too much I remind myself to take life one day at a time

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    1. Excellent advice for ever day. But not always easy to do.

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  15. I've watched so many of my friends going through what you are in selling their homes but with far less grace and humor. I know it's gotta be a headache but I hope you are handling as well as you write about it. I'd be doing less well. LOL

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    1. I think I'm in denial and someone with a magic carpet will make it all happen. LOL

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  16. It's just a lot, isn't it? Prepping the house, dealing with the realtor, pictures, etc.etc. All I can say is stay the course...it will get better. And I think you're safe on the real estate market.

    We are really glad to have the move behind us, but I have to say being somewhat early in the development, we are now living in a construction zone. Not just houses, either. This month they are extending sewers, other utilities and roads to the planned end of the development. They must be doing final prep for paving today or some such, as there are have beeping huge trucks and equipment going up and down our street all morning. I'll be glad when that finishes. It will also give us another stretch of walking space. But man, I'm tired of the noise. (Not a huge problem, I know, but I feel like whining. haha)

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    1. That does not sound fun, the construction zone. If all goes as planned I'll be the 5th person to move into the building with the other 40 something moving in over the next 30 days. It's going to be noisy, but I'll get a first row seat to see them unload if I want.

      Realtor l just left with his signed listing. What a day!

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  17. I'm reading this post on Thursday and wishing you well with your busy day.

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    1. A few snags but I hope they'll work out before the day is over.

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  18. "I'd start a support group for people with light fixtures that killed an assortment of countertop appliances." And this is why I love you so. Made me laugh out loud.

    I've never tried an ergonomic keyboard. I guess I'm not curious enough to move beyond my straight line one. Learning how to use new machine gadgets isn't my thing.

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    1. Not my thing either, that's why I'm struggling to type.

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  19. I've had laptops for years and never used an ergo keyboard. I had to get a cordless mouse though because I hate with a passion the touch pads on laptops. I need a mouse and mousepad. lol

    I have a phobia of bee's, wasps, hornets ect so I would have flipped my lid if that had happened to me.

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    1. Getting a mouse and pad were the first thing I did. I don't get how anyone can stand those built in pads.

      Being allergic to bees has caused me to learn how to calm myself around them.

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