Welcome to the Misadventures of Widowhood blog!

Welcome to my World---Woman, widow, senior citizen seeking to live out my days with a sense of whimsy as I search for inner peace and friendships. Jeez, that sounds like a profile on a dating app and I have zero interest in them, having lost my soul mate of 42 years. Life was good until it wasn't when my husband had a massive stroke and I spent the next 12 1/2 years as his caregiver. This blog has documented the pain and heartache of loss, my dark humor, my sweetest memories and, yes, even my pity parties and finally, moving past it all. And now I’m ready for a new start, in a new location---a continuum care campus in West Michigan, U.S.A. Some people say I have a quirky sense of humor that shows up from time to time in this blog. Others say I make some keen observations about life and growing older. Stick around, read a while. I'm sure we'll have things in common. Your comments are welcome and encouraged. Jean

Wednesday, July 3, 2019

I Saw Yesterday, Yesterday


I was lying in bed, dead tire when I looked up to where the smoke alarm usually flashes a green light. Only this time there were green lights flashing all around the smoke alarm. Here, there and everywhere within a three foot radius of the alarm. I thought I was having a medical emergency and that I’d better turn the light on, make sure the phone was close by to dial 9-1-1 should something else develop. When I turned the light on I discovered there was nothing wrong with my vision. I turned the light off and the erratic flashing was back again. After a few more lights on, lights off I noticed a firefly was resting on the light of my smoke alarm. I got the fly swatter, not intending to kill it but to nudge it to where I could catch and release it outside. But I must have nudged too hard because it ended upside down on the floor its wing damaged, its little butt still flashing which caught the attention of the dog. I yelled at Levi not to eat it, grabbed a tissue and apologized for having to end its life. I felt bad that an innocent bug that brought forth fond childhood memories had to die at my hands. The dog felt cheated out of a treat. The firefly, I want to believe, died happy after doing a mating dance with my smoke alarm. 

The 1st (and 3rd) Mondays of the month are always my Gathering Girls lunches and sometimes we throw in a movie afterward. This week we met for Mexican food and got caught up on everyone’s activities. One of the ladies just finished up the last of her chemo treatments for ovarian cancer. But it will be a few weeks before she knows if she’s out of the woods. Over the course of her chemo she moved in with her daughter and they both put their houses up for sale, downsized their belongings and bought another house together. In the beginning, I had my doubts about her doing all that while going through a medical crisis but it’s working out well for them. She’s happy not to be living alone any longer.

 As for me, since I dominated the conversation the last time with my surprising news about buying into the Continuum Care Complex, so I did my best to keep my mouth shut this time and only asked questions about the other women’s activities. We were just getting ready to place our orders when the lights went out in the entire area with the exception of the movie theater across that street. We made the best of the sunshine coming in the windows, ate mostly taco salads and other stuff that didn’t need cooking and suffered through them trying to prepare our checks the old school way. I was probably the only one “suffering” because I hate waiting for checks and it was taking two of them forever to do the math and I just wanted to go before I ate the rest of the community chips and salsa on the table. It's a 'clean your plate' thing left over from childhood that still plagues me today. No matter what anyone was talking about I was distracted by the stupid chips on the other side of the table. Two more minutes and I would have asked someone to pass them over.

Yesterday, the movie we saw, was something I looked forward to seeing. Not only did I need the change of pace, my love of Beatles music keeps growing as I age. The title song is one that brought tears to my eyes every time I heard it for years. “Yesterday, All my troubles seemed so far away, Now it looks as though they're here to stay, Oh, I believe in yesterday…” Its melancholy tone still has the power to transport me back to a five year period when my brother and I shared care of my dad. Dad had this little organ with programed songs in it, Yesterday being one of them. I played it every day I was staying with him and I cried each time. Driving out to the boondocks to stay with dad part of the week was one of the most difficult periods of my life. At least my husband was supportive of what my brother and I were trying to do, to keep Dad in his own home/the family cottage but I can’t say the same about my sister-in-law. 

Back on topic: Rotten Tomatoes wrote this about Yesterday, the movie: “Jack Malik (Himesh Patel, BBC's Eastenders) is a struggling singer-songwriter in a tiny English seaside town whose dreams of fame are rapidly fading, despite the fierce devotion and support of his childhood best friend, Ellie (Lily James, Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again). Then, after a freak bus accident during a mysterious global blackout, Jack wakes up to discover that The Beatles have never existed... and he finds himself with a very complicated problem, indeed.”

Reviewers are all over the map on this film but I thought it was a fun movie, a light romantic comedy with a twist and lots of great Beatles music. Not nearly as good as Rocket Man but a nice way to spend the afternoon. We all had a little trouble understanding the British accents but one reviewer I read dinged the film because it didn't include a dissertation on the evils of plagiarism. That's crazy, in my opinion. If you buy the premise that a world-wide power outage could wipe the Beatles and their music out of everyone’s memory and computers is it really plagiarism for Jack to recreate their music? Damn reviewer! I don’t want to think that hard today to puzzle that out. But I do want to claim the power outrage at the strip mall where we ate is responsible for me forgetting where I parked my car at the theater. ©

29 comments:

  1. oh I'm glad you liked the movie.
    Jean,I never remember where my car is. It happened yesterday at the grocery store. I've been doing this since 1972 😉

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    1. I try to park in the same place every time which helps but at the theater someone got to it first. It's not close to the building but it's under shade of a tree and it was hot that day.

      I found out from e-mail afterward that the ladies I went with were kind of lukewarm about the film.

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  2. I'm glad to hear you liked the movie. My Hubby went to see it and wants to see it again so I may join him now that I have a second opinion!

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    1. Let me know how you like it, is you go. I can understand wanting to see it again. With the British accents I'm sure the second time around, I'd catch more of the dialogue.

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  3. I'd have asked someone to pass over the chips and salsa!! I like them (even after lunch) and why waste?! they'd only get bin-ed.

    A song that makes me teary eyed is from Hamilton "Its quite uptown". I swear the guy (Lin-Mauel Miranda) sings it sounding laden with tears and sorrow. It always tears me up and can only wonder at the genious of that man to imagine the pain and sorrow of losing a child. ~ Libby

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    1. I have not seen Hamilton, but I people who've done the bus trip to Chicago to see it says you have to listen to the CD several times before you go if you really want to enjoy it to its fullest. I'll check and see if that song is on the web.

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  4. I loved that firefly story. I'm with you -- I think the firefly died happy. I hate when I'm the unwitting angel of death for a creature like that, but in this case, you at least spared it the realization of unrequited love!

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    1. I had vertigo once thought it was returning at first.

      I really felt bad about killing the firefly. I have lots of them in my yard but never had one inside before. Once I figured out what was going on, I tried to ignore him and go to sleep but I couldn't keep my eyes off the flashing lights on the ceiling.

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  5. The firefly story cracked me up. You probably put him out of his misery since smoke alarm was never going to accept his advances.
    Glad you liked Yesterday. I think it sounded like a fun movie and how odd to see a movie about a black out when you had just eaten in the dark.

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  6. Love the firefly story. I have such good memories of chasing them with David MacIntosh on a summer night and catching them and putting them in a glass jar and then releasing them. It seems like there were so many of them back then.

    I'm with you on the chips. They would have distracted me, too. It's so hard to leave food like that alone.

    I'm interested in your experience of buying into a Continuum Care Complex. I must go back and read that post. I've surely missed your blog.

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    1. There are several posts on this topic starting back with June 5 and reading forward.

      Who doesn't have a good memory involving fireflies? No one!

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  7. Oh, how I love Beatles music! My husband dislikes it, so I have to listen to it when he's not around. I cannot understand anyone not liking it.

    Loved the firefly story!

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    1. Me neither. I took a music appreciation class in college and I remember the professor saying the Beatles music would still be around in 400 years.

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  8. I'm so out of it, I hadn't even heard of this movie. It sounds like fun, and a great excuse to sit in the theater and listen to a lot of Beatles' music.

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    1. Hollywood is putting out a lot of movies this summer based on old musicians and groups...Prince, Elton John and The Beatles. All fun.

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  9. I loved the film!! I'm a huge Beatles can do I was very happy they included so much of their music. And Himesh Patel did a phenomenal job covering their music. I really loved his acoustic versions. I'll definitely see it again, someday! I'm still trying to get out to see Rocketman. Perhaps I'll try tomorrow. I'm afraid if I wait until next Tuesday ($5 day), it will be gone. Still, a senior discount makes other days $6.75, which isn't that bad. I never buy anything to eat or drink there, that costs more than the movie!!

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    1. I don't eat or drink anything at the movies either unless I get a free one with my rewards points. Every 10th visit.

      Himesh did do justice to the music, didn't he.

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  10. Saw it the other day and I loved it! I only know where I park because it's in the first or second handicapped space.

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    1. When I go the the theater I usually park in the same place but there was already a car there which has never happened before. Glad you loved the movie, too.

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  11. Fireflies! Such a treat for living in your humid weather! When we would take Kate back to Ohio and Indiana to visit grandparents, she always brought home a jar of lightning bugs to show her friends.

    So glad the movie theater didn't lose power!!

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    1. Me too. The theater was so close by I was surprised it was on a different grid.

      I'm surprised the fireflies lived in a jar long enough to make it back home again. Few kids manage to grow up without the experience of catching fireflies.

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  12. This one is on my list, just for the music if nothing else and the premise is cute. (The firefly story is terrific!)

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    1. You've spent so much time in England you won't have trouble with the accents like I did. :)

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  13. Happy Jean on the 4th of the July. See ya my friend.

    Cruisin Paul

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    1. Thanks! I'd wish you the same but I just remembered you live in Canada.

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    2. Dah, yes, I'm a Canadian. LOL

      Cruisin Paul
      Oh Canada

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  14. I haven't seen the movie Jean, but I'd love the music. I'll remember your story if my smoke detector light goes nuts. 😁I'm sure I'll enjoy your blog very much. Me, widow, 16 yrs coming up.

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    1. I still feel bad about killing the firefly. I even tried to ignore it after I knew what it was but I couldn't.

      Love having another reader from Oz! Welcome.

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